Dripping naked by the phone

---

I have just emptied my $20AUD bottle of Johnny Walker.. what a sad state of affairs!
I felt as if I had only just fallen asleep as Michelles mobile phone alarm started blaring in my ear at 4.15 in the morning. The night’s sleep was light at best, with the toilet light glowing through the glass door of the toilet into the open layout studio room, forcing your already shut eyes to squint further if you accidently rolled over facing that way while you slept.

The light was kept on for two reasons; one to serve as a night light for what was a very navigation unfriendly layout, and the other to keep Da Nang at bay (thank you Emma for suggesting we name our additional guest!) Da Nang is a lizard; something quite popular in Hoi An from the looks of things walking through our hotel and various other buildings in town they are seen everywhere, clinging to the walls and walking upside down on the ceiling. Harmless as they are these 10 to 15cm long reptiles do initially make you jump as they dart for cover. Saving us the problem of having the shit scared out of us before even getting to sit down on the toilet we thought we’d keep him at constant bay with the light continually glowing. So far, it has worked.

At the unjoyful hour of 4.15 I rolled out from bed, and in a morning daze got myself ready to go out, Michelle not far behind me. For this morning at this pre-dawn hour was the Sunrise Photo Tour, a tour I had been looking forward to doing some months earlier when I was first made aware of it (again, thank you Emma!). At 4.45 as scheduled a small tour bus rolled up to the entrance of our hotel, the sky still dark, the hotel reception staff fast asleep on the couches unaware of our entrance into the lobby. A tall thin Frenchman entered the foyer from the car park, it was Etienne, our photographer guide.

Our tour group was a little larger than usual Etienne admitted, with our small mini bus fully complimented with eight passengers consisting of a couple and one other from Singapore, a British couple, Michelle and I and one other Australian from Adelaide. The service Etienne provided was ingenious, an opportunity to photograph the locals doing their daily duties without the worry of being unwelcome or simply in the way. Etienne’s tours have been running for years and the locals were more than used to the attention. The mini bus dropped us off at what could only be described as a local ferry terminal; mini junk boats ferrying people and motorcycles across the inlet to where the fishing trawlers came in to offload their morning catch. Once on the other side Etienne gave us a few shooting tips then encouraged us to fan out and get as much into the locals faces as possible. Not needing much encouragement everyone scattered, walking down the piers photographing the fisherman as the unloaded their catch, walking on into the smoking houses where the white bait was dried and pressed, the majority of locals didn’t seem to mind, we had complete freedom to move about. The only part of the tour that I was uncomfortable with was Etienne’s method of taking photographs of the locals, what he would pass of as confidence I sometimes considered as ignorance, and a few of my fellow tour mates shared in this trait, some even getting slapped by old ladies for being too invasive with their cameras. Etienne’s philosophy was simple, get in as close as you can, right up close so you can pick the detail of each and every last facial wrinkle. Aside from perhaps super models of the likes of Miranda Kerr, I don’t know many people which would happily accept cameras being continually shoved in their faces whilst working, although there were a few that didn’t seem to mind, there were clearly a good few that were quite frustrated and tired of it. Despite the encouragement, it was something I couldn’t bring myself to do, I respect people’s privacy too much for that and invading it for a snap, knowing that I have pissed them off in the process wasn’t fun for me at all. Watching the others in the tour go crazy, I turned around to find an old lady standing by watching the mayhem as I was, sheepishly I politely asked if I could take her photo, motioning the camera toward her, she happily accepted and I took her photo. It was a great experience overall, and among other things, along with perfecting various techniques with Etienne’s assistance I realised that his style of photography wasn’t for me, and that I was much better suited for landscape and wildlife photography. I get a real buzz out of Wildlife photography, whether it is animals in nature or insects, there is a certain satisfaction to be obtained with capturing that perfect un-orchestrated moment, like a hunter lining up game in his sights ready for the kill; there is a skill involved, something to strive for, to perfect. This is where I got the most out of the photography tour, Etienne had provided the safari game park; I could walk around anywhere without worrying that I was in the way, and then shoot in my preferred style, from a distance, not obstructing the natural course of anything or anyone, and capture a true moment and not the ones that simply look like the hopeless dazed expression of a deer looking up into oncoming head lights.

After a few hours of photographing every aspect of the fishing docks we set off back to the other side of the inlet via boat. It was now approaching nine o’clock, our hotel breakfast closed at nine thirty. Thinking the tour was over my mouth was watering over the buffet breakfast that awaited for us back at the hotel, since at 4.45am neither Michelle or I had had a chance to eat or drink anything.

You could imagine my bitter sweetness when we arrived at the other end not to see our original mini bus transfer but a row of bicycles instead. My breakfast dream was shattered, the large orange juice I has been fantasising about was gone. On the flip side though, I had never made the time to go for a bicycle ride in Vietnam before! The ride was very easy going, hunger and thirst soon went away as we all enjoyed our frolic on an old dirt trail through the Vietnamese countryside, past the rice fields heading back toward the town centre.

When we did arrive back into town we were all buggered and dying of thirst. The tour then ended and we were left to our own devices, Michelles and mine first concern was a big brunch, since we had missed breakfast at the hotel. Wanting something heavy and filling, we browsed various menus down the street from our hotel looking for a western selection, since Vietnamese food, as delicious as it was, just didn’t seem to fill you in the same way. Finally we came across a little cafe that did burgers, and right below the menu was a photo of the juiciest looking burger ever, with a rather generous looking meat patty inside. With our mouths salivating we eagerly sat down, ordered a drink and the burger and waited in anticipation. Our drinks came out promptly and we waited.. and waited.. at the point of almost leaving our burgers finally came out, and to put it lightly they were the most depressing burgers I had ever laid eyes on. Lifting up the bun to reveal the patty, rather than a juicy generous mince patty that the photo had indicated the bun contained light shavings of a meat whom authenticity of being beef was questionable to say the least. Completely gutted and very suspicious of this sick looking burger I pushed the plate away. I would of rather volunteered for a colonoscopy performed by a leper only to have the leper finish missing a finger rather than eat that miserable excuse of a burger.

I had lost my appetite, feeling somewhat defeated and annoyed I fixated a new goal, one that couldn’t let me down, a nice warm shower. We finally made it back to the hotel room at noon, and to our disappointment our room was as we had left it, room service failed to make it to our room. With the shower in sight I no longer cared and with the steaming hot water washed my disappointments away, only to have them resurface when I exited the shower to discover that house cleaning had in fact been in while we were out, doing little more than removing the towels from our room. Standing naked in our studio room, my body dripping wet, and cold from the air conditioning I saw red, picked up the phone and unloaded my frustrations onto a poor reception clerk then kept myself warm in the shower until fresh towels arrived some moments later.

The day did pick up from there thankfully and we had a lovely afternoon eating out under the stars out on the balcony top of a very popular restaurant that Wiy had suggested the previous day. The view was spectacular, from the balcony rails we could see the main street stretch out below running parallel to the canal in front of it. This was no ordinary night, for the first time since we’ve been here both sides of the canal and associated bridges were packed, tonight was the Hoi An Full Moon Festival, the canal filled with colourfully decorated candle lit lanterns, gently floating along the surface.

Outside each and every shopfront that evening was a small alter, with various offerings and burning incense paying homage to their spiritual beliefs. It was a magical experience, the candle lit lanterns floating along the river, the streets lined with various coloured lanterns, the smell of incense floating down every street from the canals right the way back to our hotel. We felt very fortunate to have experienced a once a month event in our short three day stay.

---