"Easy, tiger" is not a direct translation of "jai yen yen na"

---

There are two concepts/phrases that always come up in books and articles about Thai culture. They are “jai yen” (in Thai: ใจเย็น) and “mai pen rai.” “Jai yen” literally means “cool heart,” even though the Lonely Planet Phrasebook translates it as “Easy, tiger”. (Don't believe everything you read in LP, though it is the backpacker’s bible!) Contrary to meaning you should be cold-hearted in the western way of thinking, it means you should try to stay calm when faced with difficulties small and large, and not get worked up or get your panties in a bunch. If someone is getting worked up over something, it is acceptable to say, "Jai yen yen na!"

The opposite is “jai rawn,” which is “hot heart” (hot-headed in our parlance, rather than passionate in a good way), and should be avoided as much as possible. Angry confrontations are therefore to be avoided, also in order for both parties to ‘save face,’ which is similarly important here. (Side note: students in Thailand are not allowed to be failed, even if they do not turn in any work or pass their exams. This is also because failing would cause the student and his family to ‘lose face.’)

One way that “jai yen” manifests itself is that people will sometimes continue to smile, even when they are angry or annoyed. I’ve tried to use this one a lot here (haven’t been angry too many times, but certainly have been annoyed) and I can’t say that I’ve always been successful. It felt really strange and counterintuitive at first, but it actually feels sort of nice sometimes, when it is successful. It’s sort of like wearing a little smiley mask, but when your face is smiling it is definitely more difficult to latch onto and amplify your anger/annoyance. I have seen some Thai people actually get angry and yell—the most memorable was some sort of jilted ex-lover scenario that was playing out in the street outside the internet café one night—but it’s pretty rare and so it really stands out when it happens.

“Mai pen rai” has several different meanings and goes hand-in-hand with the “jai yen” philosophy. It can mean: “Don’t worry about it,” “It doesn’t matter,” or “It’s ok,” and is also used as a way to say you’re welcome, but more like, “Don’t mention it.” “Mai pen rai,” is to me the Thai equivalent of saying, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” If I may generalize, Thai people seem to be very patient (except when they want to get on or off the bus- what is up with the pushing here, people!! Jai yen yen na!). And I think it probably goes without saying that your overall happiness increases when you worry less about the small things and don’t get upset so easily.

This difference in cultures can make for difficult communications at times. Westerners may seem very pushy, aggressive, and uptight to Thai people while we consider ourselves to be direct and to-the-point. Thai people may come across to us as frustratingly passive wafflers who can’t give a straight answer, but they consider themselves to be polite and non-confrontational

From my cultural perspective, there are both positives and negatives to these concepts. I really like the idea of cultivating deeper peace and not getting overly excited, especially negatively, by strong emotions like anger. But the westerner in me wonders what happens when you need to express some genuine discontent about something and do not feel free to do so? What happens to those emotions? We were always taught that it was bad to bottle them up, lest they explode someday from the tension.

I am trying to embrace these concepts to the extent that I feel comfortable with given my personal culture. They come in extremely handy here as it is important not to get worked up about the everyday annoyances, since little hassles like missing the bus when it’s 5-10 minutes early one day and sitting on one the next day for an hour after the scheduled departure time are fairly common. I think I’ve laughed off a lot of situations here that I previously would have been very annoyed about and rolled with certain things and conditions that wouldn’t be acceptable at home (oh, the luxury of home, how I miss you at times!) I’m just hoping I will be able to take at least some of the “jai yen” and "mai pen rai" with me once I leave here.

---