These Temples Are Making Me Thirsty

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1948 ICT

12 February 2013

Spasso Restaurant, Bangkok(Finished in BKK airport, 0720 13 February)


I arrived in ayutthaya with a plan. Rent a bicycle, visit a temple or two, and catch the 1312 express train back to Bangkok to finish up a few things I didn't get to do. The train arrived an hour late so I had already lost a lot of time. I took a couple of steps outside of the train station to check a map and get my bearings on the direction I needed to go before I got a bike and was approached by the ubiquitous tuktuk driver offering a 3 hour tour (i know) of 6 temples for 600 baht. I was dedicated to my plan, and said no thank you and moved out into the street. I was going to rent a bike for 59 baht, I had 2.5 hours, and I had a plan. The Rough Guide to Southeast Asia said a bicycle ride was the only way to do justice to visiting the temples and who am I to argue with the experts?


F it, it's hot out. 400 baht, lets go.


Wat Yai was first, with a very well preserved reclining Buddha and a number of great statues and structures. I know most people are not ruin nerds like me so I won't go into that much detail. I any case, they were changing the robes (they keep the Buddhas robed) when I was there... I am sure a tourist thing but whatever F it still cool.


Wat Chang was up next, called that cause they have an amusement park basically around it with elephant rides. I doubt it had any real purpose before that, but good for them... Without the circus like surroundings it would pretty much be the wilmington of the unesco heritage listed site. I am sure my tuktuk driver got a cut. I had also heard not to do elephant rides because of animal rights blah blah but F it. I am riding an elephant. It's not through the pristine jungle outside Chang Mai, but I am not going there. I will take my elephant ride in the blistering sun around this one pillar Wat.
So, it's hot out. About 15 minutes in, I started getting nauseous, with tingling in my hands and feet. I must be sweating. A LOT.

I made it through the ride wondering whether I would have been dead on the street in Ayutthaya if I tried to do anything on a bicycle. The breeze on the back of the tuktuk was the only thing that sustained me today. Getting back in, my driver offer me some candy. Could be drugs, poison to steal my stuff. F it. Didn't bring a fiber one bar because they last about 5 minutes before melting into what looks like a toddler turd in thailand. I needed something.


We got to Wat Phra Mahathat and I searched the tourist shacks for any salty snack I could recognize. If I was told cutting open an orphan would reveal to me a bag of Doritos I would have gotten a knife out and used some of the tuktuk candy as bait. I settled for the sodium in a bottle of Coke, the candy having been enough of an adventure for me. I soldiered in, photographed the Buddha head wrapped in tree roots, and told me driver I needed to get back to the station quickly after going to Wat Ratburana across the street.


He took me to a random street and let me out. Eventually enough broken English conveyed to me that the minibus was faster, trains are always delayed. Bus was 60baht. Train was 350. The bus could also be a roving reaps and or kidnap machine. The train ride was bad enough I went with the rape machine. I grabbed a water and a bag of lays (no Doritos, but other options were seaweed flavored chips or taste roulette flavored chips) next door at Tesco and hopped in the bus. I was the last one on, the bus packed with 9 Thai girls and one triad looking Thai guy. Still not convinced its not a kidnap bus. Oh well. I checked my Rough Guide and this was the location to pick up buses to Bangkok. So I relaxed a bit about being in the murder van and tore open my lays so I could regain my humanity.


I was STILL pouring sweat. Half an hour into the bus ride my forearms will still pooled with sweat, and I knew I had to have been close to heat exhaustion. I have no idea how anyone does anything after drinking in thailand. This place is brutal sober. I had to have smelled terrible. I felt guilty about sitting in the van, how I wanted to use sterile wipes on my seat. I saw the two girls in front of me giggle and kind of point back at me. I had to have smelled like something that smells really bad when it's dead. F it.


Not everyone went all the way back to Bangkok though. One girl got off on the side of the highway, like we pulled onto the sulster and she rolled out. bananas. the rest of us got off at the victory monument, at the end of the skytrain line... Skipping the nasty traffic that held up the traTank shanks tuktuk driver. It only took about an hour and 15 minutes. Time to spare to re attempt the Jim Thomspon house. I eventually was able to retrace my steppes back to the canal from yesterday and found his house. It was incredible, this 6 building teak wood compound built without nails. The gardens and lot ponds a total oasis among the sky scrapers, noise and pollution of Bangkok. Howevere after another mile and change of walking I was back toouting sweat. I went into the cafe and sat down next to the Air conditioner. The Tiger beer (the first of the trip) was worth the price of that air Con.


It must have have been a much different bangkok when he lived here, likely peacefully perched on the canal rather than choked by skyscrapers and the malls if Siam Square, with the canal taxis loudly plowing through the backyard. From stone temples that survived wars almost two thousand years ago to an OSS officers teak house less than a hunderdog years old, some of Bangkok remains the same as the world evolves the rest of it. Young and old, sinking into the sea, 3 inches a year.


F it.

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