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Published: July 30th 2009
Recently, we're just putting in our time are our required 'summer camps.' I have lucked out and only recieved a sentence of 8 days of camp, while Cass is being locked up for three weeks. For whatever reason, her school counted our days off a bit different than my school- but, as it is with the majority of things in Korea, everything is circumstantial and we just do what we're told. Regardless, all of us weigookins, are either gearing up for, or already on our epic summer vacations. We have officially ironed out plans to spend a week in Hanoi, Vietnam with a couple day side trip sailing through the World Heritage Site nearby called Ha Long Bay. On our way home, we'll have 3 days kicking around Hong Kong, and seeing what one of the greatest cities in the world has to offer. We're both super geeked up about everything, which makes the babysitting of summer camp creep along at a snails pace. Even before that, I've got a week to ramble around southwest Korea solo, in hopes of finding a cheap ticket to the Korean vacation paradise, Jeju island, but I'm not holding my breath about that one.
So in the meantime, I've been recording some of the sillier comments, stranger situations, and other oddities I thought I'd share with you. Enjoy...
Things we just never thought we’d say, hear, witness, or be a victim of… “This map would be a whole lot easier to read if it was written in Korean.”
“Dude, I was in the middle of peeing and this guy just comes over and starts talking to me. I hope he didn’t want to shake hands.”
“You’ll totally like eating Soon Dae. It’s a bunch of flavored noodles stuffed inside pig intestines.”
“I’m not gonna lie, it took me coming to Korea to start enjoying pop music.”
“The stuff I’m flossing out of my teeth smells like bad breath.”
“It’s not healthy for my body to undergo so many hundred degree temperature differences in one day.”
I becoming on you. Excuse me? Blue eye, very becoming on you.
“I smell like spicy fermented cabbage.”
“I’m strictly a tentacle eater today.”
“I’ve been here two weeks, and I’ve already had other men hold my
hand and feed me.”
“I learned how to #2 with a jacket over my legs today.”
“So the pollution brings in warm weather.”
“Without a dryer, I’ve been collecting an absurd amount of belly button lint.”
“I’m not sure if my towel is disguised as cardboard or if this is a piece of cardboard disguised as my towel.”
“The Yeongdong Expressway runs into Kangnung.”
As seen on a T-shirt- "Let's pretend we're rabbits and do it all day long...just like the bunnies do"
“If I burn my mouth one more time on this Korean coffee, I’m going to send my tongue home in an envelope… for its own good.”
“I needed to use your pit stick because of my Korean B.O.”
“We must be safe today, the Octo-mom beat out North Korea for a spot on the yahoo front page.”
“It’s crazy how everyone scatters at the first sign of a raindrop. Umbrellas are like armor.”
“I’m a rockstar because of my armhair. People were actually petting me.”
"I don’t know why I don’t have a
six pack by now, my stomach literally hasn’t stopped sweating since April."
"I just saw a tow truck fly through a red light going 90 mph… thirty seconds later, an ambulance with sirens and lights going stopped at the same red light. Priorities??"
"This is one of those times, I wish my poo had one of those ingredient lists attached to it, cuz there are some funky creatures leaving my body today!"
"I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I’ve lived my whole life to discover No rae bongs. It's a dream."
As seen on a T-shirt- "I texted you a baby"
“All I truly know, is that Korea is the land of style over substance in every way, shape, and form.”
“Lesson #1, never speak Japanese to a Korean, even if you clearly are neither.”
Teeecha, I rubba you. You what? I rubba you. You’re rubbing me? No, I rubba you. (making a heart symbol with his hands) Oh, you love-a me. Okay, okay.
“Then I realized what had cut me… it’s from overdoing it with the tambourine in the no
rae bong. That poor cab driver, wonder what he though picking up a drunk, sweaty, white guy full of blood?”
“I’ve never given a bigger fist pump at the site of Old Spice deodorant.”
“A dream came true today; I got to watch a spider eat a dragonfly out my classroom window!”
“Air-curtain… a machine above the entry doors to my cafeteria that blasts air out the open door. What the...?”
“The sun is so ridiculously hot; apparently this is what not having any ozone feels like.”
As seen on a T-shirt- "Free hugs, if you're happy." (what if I'm only so-so happy?)
“You have cut on your hand, too? No rae bong finger must be the Korean equivalent to tennis elbow!”
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joncasssouthkorea
Jon Wick
One more...
As seen on CASSIE'S new t-shirt- "Let's be Humanism"