Gettin' hitched

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I've just returned from a weird visa run to Laos, where I also had the privelege of attending a Lao wedding. The visa run was weird because I was told a million different things by various members of the Lao and Thai bureaucracies, and I was very worried that I would have to re-enter Thailand on a tourist visa and thus be an illegal immigrant! But in the end it all went smoothly, but with NO thanks to a certain RUDE woman at the Thai Embassy in Vientiane. Hmph.

As for the wedding... what a cultural experience. Invitations to Lao weddings are usually hand delivered, complete with a red envelope in which the attendee will place their present (money - $10 US for a Lao person, $20 US for a foreigner EVEN WHEN THEY EARN MANY TIMES LESS LESS THAN THEIR LAO COLLEAGUES!). RSVPs are not necessary.

The wedding ceremony, taking place on an auspicious date chosen by monks and/or astrologers (can't quite remember), starts in the morning at the bride's home with a bracelet ceremony. The bride, wearing a traditional Lao silk wrapped around her and gold jewellery, sits in a room, and the guests come and place their envelopes in front of her, and tie white string around her wrist. I couldn't really get out of my colleagues the symbolism of the white string. I assume it means that getting married is liked getting tied up, with no escape.

😉

After we did this - about 10:30am - we went downstairs to sit under the marquee. It was already very hot. We sat there for a very long time, sweating, listening to incredibly loud Lao music, blaring from these huge speakers. I would have thought that they might want to divert some of the power from the speakers to some fans, but apparently not. The cultural significance of loud music? Perhaps the modern variant of some quaint and cute local tradition whereby people were alerted to celebrations and suchlike through the loud and vigourous ringing of bells and playing of other musical instruments? Nope... they just think that playing really loud music is 'fun'. Mind you, none of the people I was with thought it was fun, but presumable some people do. Perhaps all the people who were guzzling Lao beer and skulling this incredibly strong and foul smelling Lao alcohol. While we were waiting and sweating, some of the young women came around with plastic cups and bottles of beer, of which they would pour a small amount into the cup and then offer it to us to down in a shot. I think this was supposed to promote a sense of camaraderie - sharing the same cup with the entire wedding party but it was not very attractive to me. I felt better able to experience camaraderie from a certain distance.

At around 12, the groom turned with his family members. They entered through a temporary archway, shaped kind of like a heart, and were greeted with shots of alcohol. They then had to exit through the other entry, only to enter again - this being the Gatekeeper ceremony. Here, the groom's party is meant to bribe the bride's party with money to allow them entry. In return, the bride's party gives them shots of alcohol. However, the groom's party can also just try to push their way through. This is not very polite though obviously the cheaper option. As the bride's party was mostly made of women, and the groom's of men, they decided to just push their way through. Consequently, alcohol was generally thrown about and over people, but they all seemed to find this fun.

Then the groom joined the bride upstairs for more tying of white string. Then they came back downstairs where their fathers and the village headman spoke at them, before finally opening the wedding feast. I ate rice and cabbage and soy sauce and noodle. Not so vegetarian-friendly. $20 US for that! PFFT! (The money given is meant to cover the cost of the wedding; this is instead of gifts of objects.) Shortly afterwards, at around 1:30, after having sweated and had our ears pummelled for many hours, we were able to leave. Indeed, a cultural experience! Not one that I really feel the need to repeat however!

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