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Published: November 1st 2008
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Well, what else do you do when it seems the entire Pacific ocean is raining down the whole of South East Asia and you're waiting for your train to Bangkok? You catch up with some travel bloggage!!!!
After our nice relaxing time floating down rivers on wobbly boats, jumping off waterfalls (into rock free safe to jump into lagoons), checking out mini Buddhas in caves and getting intimate with Geraldine, we headed down to Vang Vieng about halfway to the border city and capital, Vientiane. Picked up by tuk-tuk and taken to the bus station for our "VIP" bus, we were greeted by a non VIP bus that was full of smelly locals but did have a thunder box, right at the back where Lizzie and I were sat. There was air con on the bus but they turned this on for a couple of hours in the morning, when it was cool enough anyway, then turned it off for the remainder of the journey which gave the old sweat glands another workout!!!! The the views were stunning and the journey was great despite breaking down a couple of times and nearly saying goodbye to my omlette (and Lizzie her
sweet chilli chicken baguette) that we had at the bus station! 7 hours of death ride later (not 5 as the VIP ticket stated) along mountain passes and were thankful to arrive at the Vang Vieng bus depot and hopped on a tuk-tuk with some young Italian ladies (who didn't see the funny side of two dogs making babies. We thought it was funny though.) and a fellow that looked somewhat like a slimline, kind of ill, Chris Moyles.
Anyhoo, Vang vieng was even quieter than Luang Prabang although there seemed a lot more backpackers, who were all there for the hammock bars by the river and the tubing, which everyone raves about. We wandered around for about 20 minutes before we found somewhere to kip for the night (seemed to be working well just turning up in each town and then trying to find somewhere to kip......for now!!!) then we headed to a small bar where they had hammocks, sunshine, beerLao and pizza. That was us sorted for a few hours!!! We only had 2 nights here so the we decided to go tubing the next day.
Tubing is hiring a tractor inner tube for about a
fiver, getting a tuk-tuk up to the launching point about 4km upstream, then hopping in and drifting down the river until you reach the hammock bars. When I describe the tubing it doesn't actually sound that good, but we didn't realise that it was really just a pub crawl on donuts floating down the Mekong River! Awesome!!! Unfortunately we didn't have too much money as we didn't realise there were so many bars but we still managed to have a good time. A few of the bars had home made trapeze, one of them from a home made wooden crane nailed to a tree, where the platform is about 20metres up and you just swing, try and hang on, then let go when you feel like it!!! Didn't realise how much water hurt when you fall in from about 15 metres, face first but hey ho! Off to the next bar where there's a bigger one, less of a crowd to go "OOOOOOOOH!!!!! That must've hurt" when you land and a Krypton factor style zip line!!!! Lizzie was having babies about the thought of more rapids after our Zambezi adventure, but a few trickles aside, it was fairly relaxing! Down
in the valley floating along on a tractor inner tube, swinging into rivers. I miss home! Ha! The whole day was kind of like a day out at a big center parcs, with a few beers along the way and getting whiplash from jumping into (again rock free, current free, and again very safe) water from trapezes thrown in. As we came to the end of the ride down the river, the wind started to come through the valley and the rain came in again, and we wandered through the town like drowned rats back to the hotel before heading out for more pizzas!
The next day we were again booked on a VIP bus, which was again, non VIP but was still better than the previous one. Only a 4 hour journey this one and we at least got picked up from our guesthouse, and with a short stop for a tinkle and a cornetto halfway, we arrived in the middle of nowhere in Vientiane. Out with the guidebook again then! We wandered the streets for a while looking for some guest houses that fitted our modest budget, however we struggled to find somewhere so when we did
we settled for it. Remember I said it had worked out well just finding somewhere when we arrived? Well, it wasn't the greatest place, sufficed to say we checked out again ASAP the next morning and found somewhere else. We couldn't quite put our fingers on what it was about the place, but we think it was the bathroom that randomly flooded when you flushed the toilet, which in turn flooded the actual bedroom, the beetles and bugs crawling over us in the night, the squeaky rattly fan that did about as much good as a midget waving an Avon catalogue in my face or the smell of stale urine.
Before retiring back to the guesthouse from hell, we headed out for dinner at one of the many restaurants/shacks put up along the riverside then we thought we'd treat ourselves to a traditional Loas massage. We were sat down and had our feet scrubbed by two young Laos girls (probably about 18) then led into a room where we were left with what appeared to be pyjamas issued at a mental health asylum. Despite being a little snug around that J-Lo arse of mine, they were definitely my colour
and Lizzie looked stunning, so we threw them on and our ladies returned. They cracked every bone in our bodies, nearly pulled off each finger and toe but it was very relaxing. Lizzie spent most of the time giggling while I spent most of the time trying to work out calculations in my head, naming each of Aston Villa's Goalkeepers from the past 20 years and generally thinking about football.
Anyway, the Orchid Guest house for 11 of the queen's english pounds was much nicer (the bathroom didn't flood with toilet stuff) and the owner wasn't high. From here we hired some bicyles again and went to the presidential palace (which looked more like Great Yarmouth library and wasn't that impressive) and up to a golden temple (not just any temple....this one was Golden!!!!!). Turns out it wasn't made of gold but was painted gold but was still very impressive in the evening sun, before we cycled the 3 miles back to our guesthouses and off out for dinner again.
So like I said, we're now waiting for the bus to take us to the Thai border, which is about 25km away, before we catch our VIP (yep
VIP again....watch this space) sleeper train to bangkok. Kirk will be arriving at 1600 hours. Let the games begin..........
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roseyboy
non-member comment
Bangkok
All looks amazing, especially the elephant with an arse for a head. Enjoy bangkok- make sure you try a trip on a dragon boat (haggle for price!) and enjoy the ping pong shows. Oh, and for meal out try either cabbages and condoms or Gaylords (its a curry house and its not for homosexuals).