Sunstroke and the Head

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Today we rode to Khoun Si waterfall on push bikes. The ride was 35km there along a muddy Laos rode, up and down some jungle hills. Nick was quite unwell and stopped by the side of the road to be sick. I wondered if he was showing early signs of Malaria, with a recurring illness, but told him that it was probably just sunstroke. Anyhow, he had a "wild shit" in the bush and looked a bit perkier.
Laos is a strange country. It is humid, full of muddy roads and mosquitoes and everywhere is dirty. Yet, it is considered quite unacceptable for anybody to be unclean. Thus people went past us on motorbikes with frilly umbrellas above their heads and shiny skin. Kids laughed at our mud stained faces in the streets, one girl even stopped me to show to her friends.

We currently eat at a local stall each morning, seemingly run by an eight year old girl. She was a hard bargainer at first, refusing nothing less than 5000 Kip (25p) for a french stick filled with salad. After some repeat trade she offered to put in some chicken today, and we think tomorrow we might get mayonaise as well.

Days in Luang Prabang are spent in fear of being found by a man we have come to know as "****head". We gave him this name after we realised he featured in both of our top five worst people in the world. He is from South East London, and whenever he sees life he begins telling people about how many countries he has visited, and lists in detail his amazing experiences of life. All lifeforms are lucky to be shined on with his knowledge. Conversation with him is also not interactive and any sentence you say will only fuel him to talk about himself more. Luckily for me Nick has an eagle eye, and has spotted him from over 75m away. One close call resulted in us having to bury into a crowd of alarmed Laos folk for cover. In honour of the man, we will be leaving some of his best quotes at the end of each of these blogs.

Tomorrow we move onto Vang Viang. Ok, that's me done for today, the bed and Wok is calling. x

EXTRACT FROM CONVERSATION BETWEEN DAN AND ****HEAD

HEAD: Have you got a (motorbike) licence?
DAN : No, I rode for a bit in SA though.
HEAD: Roads terrible there aren't they?
DAN: Oh, you've been to SA?
HEAD: I've been to every country in Asia South of the Equator. (Continues for 31 minutes about Asian countries, even supplying his personal tips on language, eating and sleeping. Dan is trapped in boat and cannot escape).

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