Day Eighty Six: Nihon jin tour guide

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I'm sitting across the table from a german girl in a traditional izakaya in Ikebukuro. I'm drunk and trying to teach her how to order food in japanese. She's giggling and pushes the button for the waiter to come over, he arrives at the table bowing deeply and asks in Japanese what we would like. Ines panics and forgets everything I taught her in her minute japanese lesson and orders in english. Damn! She's giving english speakers a bad name! He doesn't know she's german! He probably just thknks she's lazy!! Bah I sneer at her drunkenly and accuse her of disgracing my name, she sneers back at me and we start to duel across the table in chopsticks. Now we're both giving gaijins a bad name. Our next two dishes have arrived on the table; fried chicken gristle and Yakitori (chicken skin skewers). hehehe I love japanese food. We start picking at the food and talking about Ines' trip - the japanese boys at the next table are very interested in us - we campi! with them enthusiastically and down our beers. I'm laughing at Ines - she comes from germany - the land of the litre stein and she's holding a beer glass that's so tiny she needs to fill it up 3 times just to finish a bottle of Asahi. Kawaii. It's so nice being out with someone who speaks less japanese than me, she keeps complimenting me. It's so nice, because I really can't speak much japanese at all and tonights the first time I've ever acted as translator for someone before. It's excellent.
The night continues and after a few hours we're completely full, drunk and out on the streets, we bid each other farewell at the station and I clamber aboard the train on my way home. The trains crowded and I'm squished up against the door wishing I had a class of water with me when I felt it. Stroke, Stroke. Oh dear. A gentle pause and then subtly, slowly it starts again. Stroke, Stroke. I roll my eyes and turn around to face the skinny pervert with his hand in my blonde tresses. I could swear at him in japanese, I do know how to. But the train is full and I can't be bothered. I hold my arms up in a cross (the japanese way of showing the word No) and say Damai (the Japanese word for No) He smiles at me with yellow crooked teeth and I turn away. Thats it. I'm going brunette tomorrow.

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Photos

Ines
with her tiny japanese beer!