I wish I hadn't forgotten my camera

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06/7/22

This is going to be the most random post ever, because it was written when I just couldn’t sleep for whatever reason.

You know, for all that the Japanese education system is supposed to be top-notch (until university) there is little or no emphasis placed on higher education here, especially for women. As a woman and a college graduate, this bothers me. Yes, I learned academically at college, but more importantly I grew as a person through the whole college thing. I think it’s an experience everyone should have. Maybe that’s my American bias, and I know the opportunity is there for the Japanese, but they have to work so ridiculously hard to get it. Shiyou ga nai, ne.

I want to do some art and stuff. I need a paycheck, eh. No I don’t, I’ll just write. I’m OK at that. I’ve finally managed to get myself over the fact that my computer dumped all of my work right before I left. I’m re-doing it, and it’ll be better. Yay writing. There is no way to tell people in Japanese that I majored in creative writing—well, there is, but very few people know of it. Waseda is the only place I know of where it can be studied in Japan. But everyone at work who knows thinks it’s sugoi! In other words, pretty cool.

By the way, guys, I’m being really sentimental, but I just remembered that almost all of us have graduated (and the others are on their way)!!! We’re going to do so much. You’re the most awesome people I’ve met—I’m in awe of all of you, actually. But don’t worry, I’m not selling myself short either. I plan to knock the socks off this world.  I can only imagine what you’ll do. Haha.

06/7/24

I should probably spare you my romantic musings, but I think I’m starting to really like someone. Not someone here, by the way. I should quit talking to him so often (or corresponding, as it were). He’s such a good guy, but it would never work anyway because these things have to be mutual, and all guys I’m attracted to somehow turn out to be less than I imagined anyway—which is quite probably no fault of theirs, but of my imagination. Eh, we’ll see what happens, and it will probably be nothing. I do, after all, have a flair for melodrama and worrying about nothing.

And speaking of—OH MY GOSH, MATSUMOTO. I went there last night for an interview today (my final placement interview for the company I will work for in the fall, if all works out). It was soooo fantastic. Nagano-ken is the Japan Alps. Seriously. At Matsumoto Station there were four exits. One was called Castle exit (it led to the city’s castle), and one was called Alps exit. Enough said. Even more, they have Alps Park, and serious hiking trails out of the city and into the mountains. Really though, Tokyo keeps getting pushed down on my list of cool places—for many reasons. My current list is such: 1) Kyoto 2) Matsumoto 3) Shiga and Lake Biwa 4) Okazaki 5) Nagoya 6) Tokyo. Bet y’all wanted to know that.

The scenery in Nagano is breathtaking. Mountains, trees, rivers, traditional houses (not apartments!). I was watching it from the train—I had brought my Basho book to read (every time I read them the meaning changes—as good poetry does, I suppose. Grows with you), but I couldn’t quit watching. Until I got motion-sick, that is. I think it was motion sickness, but it might have been just regular sick, because I couldn’t eat anything that night. *shrug*

Anyway, I got to walk around the city a little bit before bed—there were shops with awesome clothes, an awesome temple, a cute Balinese restaurant, taiko (drumming) practice, and spiky, blond-haired gaijin who hit on me all within a five minute walk from my hotel. All but the last bit were great, and the last bit was ok. There was no following involved. Lol. Seriously, Matsumoto does not suffer from ugly city syndrome. So gorgeous. And surprising.

Azumino, where I would work, is the next town over, and quite serendipitously is known for its art!! I found a fantastic art/stationary/telescope shop right near the station. What could be more perfect? Astronomy, art, writing shtuff, nature, and Japanese all in one place. Sure, the winter is like Michigan’s, and they don’t really insulate or heat their houses…but what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, eh?

I had the interview early this morning, but honestly the morning started badly with my alarm not going off and me not getting up until the person who came to escort me the interview showed up at the hotel. It’s a good thing I’d put my clothes out and otherwise packed up the night before, because I was up, dressed, and checked out of my room in 10 minutes flat. We are talking a suit here, people. Crazy. But, huzzah for my first normal interactions with a youngish Japanese guy. Satake-san, I love you. Lol.

And then, of course, the interview was in Japanese. It was scary, but fun! I did have a translator for when I absolutely didn’t understand something, or couldn’t say something in Japanese, but for the most part it was ok. The entire process was elegant and formalized—so of course I felt the need to make them laugh. They are hiring a westerner, after all. I might as well be western. I am not, nor would I want to be, Japanese.  Anyway, they asked me what the hardest thing about the Japanese lifestyle was, and since I’d just climbed up and down a set of stairs in slippers that were too big and kept falling off (a big no-no—your feet can’t touch the floor) I said that the most difficult thing was that the slippers were sometimes too big. And that got Japanese businessmen laughing. Even if I don’t get the placement, I think they’ll remember me.

Mr. Satake told me that he thought my Japanese was of quite a high level, and I’m getting to the point that I don’t want to hear about my Japanese anymore. I want it better—doesn’t really matter what it currently is, eh? Besides, depending on who I talk to, my level varies from sugoku jouzu (really good) to communicative. Broad range. I don’t really think I know a whole lot.

I managed to get back on time to go to work in Kariya today (and therefore not get docked pay! Go me). While I was on the local train to Kariya, two people who I’m ninety-nine percent sure were sumo wrestlers got on the train. Their hair was ceremoniously done, and they were huge!! Humongous. that looks weird. I was pretty certain also, because someone told them ganbatte (good luck, fight well, etc). It was pretty cool.

You know, I was thinking about the Ryoanji today, and I’m not sure Zen is all it’s cracked up to be. The well that water for the tea ceremony was taken from is inscribed with ‘I learn only to be content’, and that’s all well and good, but part of life is its ups and downs, I think. I wouldn’t appreciate contentment so much but for the downs, and exhilaration can be exhausting—so I wouldn’t want exhilaration all the time, and that makes me appreciate contentment too. You might need all of the extremes of emotion in life. I’m not a philosopher, though. Nor have I thought deeply about this—I just can’t sleep.

I wish I didn’t live in the past so much, so I could just shut my mind off and sleep.  My mind shouldn’t be wrapped around things that happened a year, two, and even almost three years ago. And neither should I be worried about how things could have been better, because that boat has definitely sailed, eh? The only thing I can do is look towards the future, and other things that will happen, because life is full of lots of things to do! Maybe things will come full circle in the future anyway. No way to know. Sorry, that was really vague. I’m just musing, and don’t want to bother anyone with details. And that’s all she wrote for today, I think. I’m going to listen to the Beach Boys or some such nonsense.

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