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Postcard shot
Ariel with her board.Agonda - Local Beer - Kingfisher & mucho vodka.
“How much for a Tuk Tuk to agonda my friend?”
“400 rupees Sir.”
“400 Rupees!!! No chance mate. Miles too expensive… 300 Rupees yeah?”
“No no Sir. It’s very long way. I big family to feed.”
“Ok mate, I’ll just take this 300 Rupees and feed another driver’s family then, see ya”
“Noooo! Sir, wait, Ok then Sir….. 300 Rupees!”
After tense negotiations with our Tuk Tuk driver we squeezed our rucksacks into the back and got the hell out of Palolem. Don’t get me wrong, Palolem is a pretty nice place but recently over-commercialised and packed to the bamboo rafters with package tourists. You could be anywhere in the world.
So, in a quest for serenity and pure Indian idyllic tranquillity, we set off on the bumpy journey to Agonda beach, a short way North up the Goan coast.
Our driver (who’s apparently got a big family) dropped us on a backstreet in Agonda and pointing to the beach just shouted “Beach that way. You sleep in hut on beach!” Then he roared off up the hill, Tuk Tuk spluttering and coughing black smoke all over the place!
Best view on the beach
Us and Ravi outside Nick's hut (on the poor side!) Now, Agonda beach is a long old beach and there is only a small spattering of beach hut accommodations along its 3 km stretch. It was 35 degrees and no way we could tackle the job of finding a room with our huge rucksacks. Kelly waited in a little bar and off I went up the beach. I walked about 2 kilometres up the beach which was pretty much deserted apart from a few hippy types sat around smoking in groups on the sand. As I walked I looked out to sea and spotted the dolphins straight away. They were swimming up the coast, the same direction as me and stayed in line with me all the way up the beach. Amazing. These dolphins would become a familiar sight to us during our stay in Agonda.
After checking almost every beach hut place on the coast I finally settled on the coolest looking one in Agonda, ‘Summer Sands’. There were two types of beach hut here. The ‘poor side’ which were made of straw and had no facilities, and the ‘posh side’ which comprised of solid quality waterproof wooden huts with toilet, shower, balcony with hammock, and the most
Francis & Nickerlarse
To be fair, Nick's hut on the poor side had the best view on the entire beach. Cockney Cant! magnificent view of the relentless roaring surf . After a brief bartering session with the owner ‘DJ’ (what a geezer) and Team Robbo were in the neighbourhood! We booked in for 3 nights (we, errr, ended up staying for 6 weeks!) Oh yes, the wife was pleased…. at last Thank F*ck!
Unpacked, board shorts on, out of the hut, and heading for the surf, we bumped into some of our hut neighbours all sat around doing what everybody here seems to be doing…shmokin! Stopping for a brief chat and ‘nice to meet ya, what’s ya name and where ya come from’ session, little did we know we had just met the wart that would be stuck to our backsides for the next 6 weeks…
Entrance - Stage Left - ‘Mr. Nick Dodd’ aka ‘Snoop Dodd’ aka ‘The ‘D’‘O’ ‘Double D’ aka ‘Snowflake’ aka ‘Nickski’ aka ‘Nickerless’ aka ‘Nickerlarse’ aka ‘Ooorsuuuuum!’
Now, Nickski fancies himself as a Cockney geezer seeing as he lives in Maidstone near Essex!!?? When first meeting Nick, most people would be inclined to think ‘Oh for Gods sake, who is this Jellied Eel munching, barrow boy, Southern Fairy who calls everyone a ‘Cant!’ But, like a
Chillin in da hood
Lazy daze at Summer Sands wart, he grows on you. Needless to say, he was our best pal for our time in India and we’ll probably never get rid of him now!
We spent our first night in Agonda partying on the beach with our new neighbours, drinking Kingfisher beer til’ it came out of our ears, watching the dolphins splashing around fifty metres away, aaaah, surely this is the true Goa! The rest of the group consisted of Nick’s sister ‘Pip’ aka ‘Doctor Dodd’, a proper party head and a proper Doctor! Marc and his Swiss travelling chums, another couple from Leeds, and the two Swedes Eric and ‘Erica’ (who later became the prime subject of EricaGate and young Nick’s personal education in life that you can never trust a woman. As a friend she can be fantastic but as a girlfriend she will give you cancer of the heart!!)
Our hostess with the mostest ‘DJ’ was without doubt, the best Indian local we met in the whole of India. What a guy. Whenever you wanted something, anything, he would not let you move a muscle. “You want a beer? I will bring for you.” “You want a banana pancake with chocolate?
Nickerlarse
During one of the many late evening beach sessions I will bring for you.” You want cigarette? Rizla? Extra pillow? Chicken Tikka Massala? Hire car? Milky Coffee? French Toast? Condoms? I will bring for you!” Hence the reason we stayed here for 6 weeks.
We saw a lot of fellow travellers come and go during our 6 weeks in Agonda. Spanish, Swiss, Swedish, Brits, Aussies, Dutch, Germans, Indians, Americans, Sri Lankans, and most of all, the Polish dudes and ‘Henry’ the Kiwi Masterchef aka ‘Kingfish’ aka ‘Henski’ aka ‘Henrietta’. Henry is a horny young New Zealander who arrived in Agonda after just spending an epic 3 weeks riding a motorbike around India with a young English rose who never once ‘put out’ (in Henry’s words), not even a peck on the cheek! Needless to say that the lad was a touch frustrated. Henry brought the drinking games and the parties to our little beach community. Eleven O’ Clock in the morning, where’s Henski? He’s in the kitchen area rustling up a tray of triple strength Mojito cocktails….. Legend.
Meanwhile, on the other side of camp, our three new Polish neighbours had set their beach towels on the only three sunloungers. It looked like they meant business. And
Doctor Dodd
Nick's big sister 'Pip' looking a bit worse for wear it looked like they were here for the long-haul.
At first we were a bit unsure about the Poles, these new arrivals to our comfy paradise haven, especially the big guy ‘Yanush’. We convinced ourselves right from the word go that he was the head of the Polish Mafia! Anyway, turns out that Yanush is the nicest guy in the world and he thinks that the whole world is “Awesome” and “Amazing” “Yeah really!” “Definitely!” ‘Yanis’ as we then named him (in typically ignorant British fashion) was here with his Ex girlfriend ‘Gosha’ who he was attempting to wooo and reclaim as his own for once and for all! Good old Yanis turned out to be the maddest vodka drinking party animal we ever met. We drank vodka every night for 2 weeks solid. We drank vodka in the sun, we drank vodka in thunderstorms, we drank it for breakfast, we drank it on the beach, in the sea, in the huts, we drank it whilst swinging in a hammock, we drank a shit load of vodka! But at £3 per litre, why not?!
Anyway, to cut a long story short… Yanis never did rekindle the flame with his
Neighbours
from all corners of the globe Ex-love Gosha (who when sunburnt, looked a bit like raw salmon). Partly because Yanis went to bed early one night after we’d been drinking vodka all night for a change and left Gosha and Nick together in Nicks hut. Now I don’t know if anything actually happened between Nickski and Gosha that night (well I do really but I can’t broadcast it on the world wide web or my poor little Cockney pal might get his legs broken!) but there was a funny atmosphere for a few days afterwards and a strange smell of salmon down by the sunloungers…. Mmmm I wonder?
The surf in Agonda is pretty good at times. Our daily routine would be something like this…. Wake up at around 11am, order a banana pancake and milky coffee, have a smoke, brush teeth, pick up surf board, hit the surf! We created a whole surfing fraternity on Agonda beach, each member being given a surf legend nickname that can not be disclosed to anyone outside of the fraternity. The nightly sunset surfing sessions in Agonda will forever be imprinted in our memories. Absolutely breathtaking. True freedom.
Our beach huts were also the base for the
Eric the Swede!
doing what he does best... Agonda Turtle Protection Centre. There were dozens of turtle nests on the beach each containing up to 140 turtle eggs. We had arrived right at the end of the hatching season. A nest had hatched the night before we had arrived so we missed it. Part of the reason we stayed in Agonda so long was to hopefully wake in the middle of the night to a flurry of turtle hatchlings digging their way out of their shells and heading down the beach to the water’s edge. We left Agonda after five weeks having seen no turtles hatch and spent a couple of nights back in Palolem before remembering how ‘UnAgonda’ish’ it was and headed straight back to Agonda. The very first morning back in Agonda and we awoke to a loud banging at our hut door and DJ shouting “Mr Frank, Mr Frank, the turtles are coming!” We jumped out of bed and ran down to the beach where sure enough, around fifty turtles had just hatched. What an amazing way to start the day. We helped the baby turtles to the water’s edge and watched many of them scamper towards the water themselves, some getting smashed by the
Colin 'Triple C' the Dog
One too many for young Colin waves that were crashing in but most of them swimming straight off into the deep.
TEAM ROBBO = TURTLE CONSERVATIONISTS.
So much happened during our time in Agonda. Indian festivals with fireworks and banging drums til’ three O’ Clock in the morning, villagers battling each other with an array of different coloured paints. We ate Vegetable Vindaloo curry in the home of Vindaloo, Colin our loyal, all protecting beach dog that we renamed ‘Triple C’ meaning ‘Colin Cancer Cock’ due to the unfortunate genital disease that he clearly had! Poor little shit, the beach dogs in India just get neglected and left to fend for themselves. We went to silent disco’s, drove Tuk Tuk’s ourselves, lived through heatwaves, monsoon lightning storms, and attacks from renegade cockroaches in our rooms. We drove 60 miles through the back streets of India in the pouring rain with no windscreen wipers. We spent hours swinging in hammocks being serenaded by the acoustics of nature. We laughed, cried, smoked, choked, drank enough vodka to halt an invading Russian army, and even had ‘one for t’ road!’
Nick postponed his flight home to England and stayed with us for another 2 weeks before having
Agonda sunset
kelly capturing one of 49 sunsets in Agonda a bad day and complaining that he was sick of the locals trying to rip him off (they put the price up on a bar of Snickers from 7 pence to 8 pence and it seemed to send him to breaking point) he eventually went home after an extra 9 days, and booked another flight home.
So, at the end of the season, and the end of the Agonda Adventure, the only tenants left at Summer Sands were Team Robbo and DJ our faithful host. Total solitude in paradise. We travelled back down to Palolem one last time to visit Henski who had relocated there. After a good night out with Henski in his new ‘hood’ we were no sooner saying our tearful goodbye’s to Henski, DJ, Summer Sands, the daily dolphins, the turtles, the locals, and finally goodbye to Agonda.
The very last leg of our Round the World trip was to the Indian capital of Delhi. We spent a few days in Delhi. We had a quality hotel with room service ( which Kelly took full advantage of) and spent 2 days checking out the sights. Both of us ended up with a dodgy stomach for
the first time since Thailand, good old Delhi belly, what more did we expect?! Next thing we knew, we were on flight V1558 from Delhi to London Heathrow. Great flight but as we descended through the now strangely unfamiliar grey clouds of the British weather system, reality hit home. This is it… the end… work… bills to pay… the real world! It doesn’t seem like two minutes since……
It’s been emotional.
Life changing.
Thanks for tuning in.
Much Love.
Team Robbo.
Big shout out to Gita, Sidoo and Ravi aka ‘The Ravmeister’ - without you none of this would have been possible.
Bodhi R.I.P - You are with us... always.
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Pritam
non-member comment
Hello!
Hello Mr. Robinson! I'm an Indian, and I've lived all my life in west bengal. Your blog is truly nice! Basically a bit emotional too :-) I went to Goa in 2004 and stayed 2 weeks there. Well, I really enjoyed goa. At the end of your blog it seems you're missing goa very much. Have you seen Andaman? One of the most beautiful island in India(arguably in the world)! Do you have any plan to come back to Goa in the future?