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Published: September 20th 2007
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CHINA & MACAU
Hello me old china's.
A little off-track, I crossed from Vietnam into China. The first city I reached was Kunming, a monster of a city. Like most cities in China it is expanding at an exponential rate and has an economy that is growing almost as fast as Facebook membership. The world's 5th biggest country is the most populated. Unless you can imagine what 1 billion people looks like, China's population is unimagineable.
In the areas surrounding Kunming are a few sites worth seeing, including the exaggeratively named "1,000 Buddha cave" where I counted precisely 24 Buddha's. Despite the vastness of Chinese cities, they are still very user friendly for bicycles and thousands of people use this as the main form of transport. For example, and as everyone now knows and can sing, there are 9 million bicycles in Beijing.
The first thing I noticed about China is that it smells. Not always in a rotting flesh or sewage way (though usually), but often with the aroma of spices and authentic cooking. Chinese gastronomy is a very different fare to what we order back home. It is usually a large bowl of watery broth,
filled with noodles, vegetables and lumps of unrecogniseable meats. And not a prawn cracker to be seen. The Chinese noisily slurp this down, whilst dextrously picking out the solids with chopsticks. I've never really mastered chopstickery and furthermore never really understood why they still bother to use them. As a wise man once said, when the farmers invented the pitchfork they didn't continue to gather the crops with spears.
Next I took a train to Guilin, from where I originally intended to start the cross-China ride to Hong Kong - so not technically cheating then. The train journey itself was a scene (I caused a scene, I should say). I jumped onboard with my bike, expecting it to be like any other train. Except Chinese sleeper trains are jam-packed with beds and not much else. I had nowhere to put my bike, other than on my bed. My bed was the top bunk of three, so after much climbing and smacking unhelpful people across the heads with my back wheel, I eventually forced the bike on the mattress. Which didn't leave much space for me. I would have slept on the floor, except the sight of my bike see-sawing
at every sway of the train and the 4 nervous people in the beds below, I decided the safe thing would be to share the (single) bed with my bike. Let's just say I've had better night sleeps.
Guilin is yet another populous Chinese city. But its location amongst karsts and on the Li river maintains its attractiveness. The city's huge Seven Star park is impressive, with 7 karsts situated in a Plough-like constellation. It has a number of caves, temples, waterfalls and a well-caged Panda, who would no doubt be energetically bouncing around the wild and making lots of babies were it not lounging around in a glass box.
Over the next week I cycled south, clocking up around 600 km. The weather in southern China was incredibly humid and at the end of a long day in the saddle, I would ming more than the most merciless Chinese dynasty. Along the journey I had my fair share of dramas, eye-opening experiences and interesting encounters. I'll condense this into some sort of montage (even Rocky had a montage).
Firstly, I have to mention the toilets. I've seen and used many holes in the ground this trip, but I
was still caught off-guard by China's public conveniences. The holes are like any other, but there would be 5 holes in a row, facing another 5, all without any sort of cubicle for privacy. The locals would happy squat on their hands and do their thing unabashed. The fact that I, as a Westerner, was too uncomfortable to overcome my sanitary inhibitions was my problem, not theirs. Plus, it takes a lot of upper body strength, which helps to explain why China produce so many Olympic gold standard gymnasts. Lord Coe take note. The other issue was that it was difficult to complete the Sun crossword before the lactic acid set in.
I stopped at a pretty town called Yangshou. Whilst wandering the streets I was approached and asked if I had the time to visit the local school and run an "English corner". With little else to do, and the draw of free beer and food to tempt me, I said yes. I ended up running a full lesson, which I banked in for free accommodation in the school's dorms. What I won't do for a free meal, beer or bed is not legally publishable.
Surprisingly, China
has much more in common with the US than almost any other country. Economic growth and opportunities. McDonald's, Coca Cola, Nike stores and adverts everywhere. Plus the topography of diverse, empty scenery interspersed with large metropolises. But China does still holds onto its socialist roots, despite its commercial growth. Each morning at 7am, be it on trains, in hotels or even just walking the streets, there would be a cacophony of speakers telling everyone to get up and go to work for the state. Don't be idle and let down your fellow man. I've not learnt Mandarin in a week, the scripture was translated for me by one of the nervous looking passengers on the train.
From city to town to village I pedalled until finally reaching the border of Macau, perched on a peninsula of the Guangzhou region (formerly Canton). Macua is a former Portuguese colony, now a Chinese enclave, passed back over to China in the late 90's, Hong Kong style. Similar to Hong Kong, it remains a Special Administrative Region, basically allowing it to self-govern (for a few years). In fact Macau is a Hong Kong wannabee in almost every way. They even drive on the
left, which I cannot explain, since their influences are from Portugal and China, both of whom drive on the right. Anyone? The major difference is that Macau has opted to legalise gambling. And the Chinese love a flutter. Mega casinos are sprouting up like enormous spangly sunflowers and forecasts suggest it will overtake Vegas as the primary international gambling hub. Already MGM Grand, Steve Wynn, Pharaoh's Palace and now The Venetian have sister casino's here.
The problem is I am attracted to casinos like an iron filing to a supermagnet. Over the years casinos have been more than kind to me, so it was only fair that I gave the house a chance to break even. The first time I tried to get into one of Macau's casinos I was denied entry for looking too much like a tramp (apparently shorts and flip-flops are not the image they are looking for). Maybe this was a message from the Big Man upstairs to quit whilst I was ahead. But it's not like God's word is gospel, and he's been wrong about a few things in the past - evolution, etc.
I came armed with a fail-proof roulette strategy. It
could only fail if black didn't come up 5 consecutive spins. RED: RED: ZERO: RED. Suddenly I had a 50/50 chance of not losing my remaining travel budget. 5th spin - The ball gripped the side of the wheel until it gradually began losing momentum, bouncing into black, then red, then somewhere else, then it winked at me and settled in BLACK 17. Wahey, I was 5 dollars up (that's HK dollars - ie. 33 pence). I cashed in my chips, took a free drink for the road, and let these losers with shameful gambling habits fight their vices. Some people might say going to a casino by oneself could be seen as desperate, sad or sleazy. I say, look at my winnings.
Macau's highlights can be seen in a (long) day - the old square, the old red light district (which you may recognise from the opening scene of The Temple of Doom. It was lost on me), the old fort, the old lighthouse, Taipa island, the history museum, the Macau tower. Oh, and the casinos. With another stamp in the passport, it was time to complete the cycle ride to Hong Kong. By boat.
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Mike
non-member comment
Driving on the right
FACT...FACT...FACT...FACT All of Europe used to drive on left. When Napoleon invaded most of it, he stamped his authority by telling everyone to drive on the right. Considering he invaded Portugal too and if Macau was taken my the Portuguese before this, then that may be why they drive on the left in Macau.