Fireworks, names and hot water

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Two months ago, when I was in Jinan, it was snowing, one month ago here it was so cold that my hands swelled up and I could see my breath when I was lying in bed. Now, I write this having been sitting outside for the last two hours in 30 degree heat eating ice-cream in the square. Strangely, despite me having spent most of my time since last September in either Costa Rica or China I am not someone who deals with the heat very well, and worryingly I cant imagine that this is going to be like it is at home where the worst of the sun is over by the end of June, and I can look forward to overcast rainy days until a brief Indian Summer in the early autumn gets everyone all excited. The fact that this weekend I still saw people wearing coats probably indicates that there might be a fair way to go yet in terms of a maximum temperature.

If you're looking to get out of the heat, most of the restaurants and cafes here give you a glass of water when you sit down and then continue with free refills for as long as you stay. The peculiar thing is that the water is hot, almost boiling, and they seem to swear by it. The reason I've been given for this is that in the past when China's water supply was riddled with disease and bacteria - although it's hardly a life giving health drink these days either - the only way it could be drunk was by boiling it, so that's what people did, and it just stuck, despite it being about as refreshing as a sleeping pill.

That said, when it's freezing outside - particularly when someone didn't have the foresight to bring a coat thanks to an abject lack of research and an unshakeable belief that because in July it's hot in Hong Kong, that means that all of China must be hot, all year - it was nice to be given a hot drink of anything as soon as you walked into an establishment. The same cannot be said when it's 32 degrees outside, however, and it makes the questionable looks I get in work for having a bottle of cold water even more perplexing.

Another curious, different but very interesting thing about being here is the Chinese/English name situation. All of the students I teach have English names, as do almost all of the people I have met on the street and in and around the city. It seems they're generally given these names by a parent with a good grasp of English or by their first English teacher, which worryingly, on occasions, is me. Some Chinese names do have relatively similar English equivalents, but in some cases it is open forum to pick whatever names you fancy. I heard various stories about teachers naming children before I arrived, the best (although it is probably apocryphal) was the one about a teacher taking a class in it's second year of English, where all of the students had been named by the previous teacher. On his first day, the new teacher sits down to do the register -
-"Phil"
-'here'
-"Grant"
- 'here'
- "Bianca"
- 'here'
- "Ricky"
- 'here'*

One of the best things is that because the names are essentially meaningless to the children, they are not bound by trends, fashions or even by gender. Which leaves you with girls who have boys names, boys who have girls names, children named after objects and best of all, classes full of Primary school aged kids called things like Bill, Betty and Hank.

My own strategy for naming - which is more difficult than you'd think by the way. Parents get 9 months to think about this kind of stuff but I have to do it in a few highly pressurised seconds - is to just go through Everton's 1995 FA Cup winning side, who in my opinion are long overdue a tribute like this. It'll be a happy day when I get to read out a register containing the names Neville, Anders and Daniel Amokachi.

Slightly less unusual than all this is the popularity of fireworks out here. Anyone who's been to a Chinese New Year celebration in England will know how fond they are of them, and I myself have a frankly childish enthusiasm for anything like that, but there is a very real risk of becoming jaded when they're going off three or four times a day, with the regular 'midnight display' being my least favourite at the moment. I suppose 'fireworks' might be overstating them a little, 'bangers' might be more accurate as there is very rarely anything to be seen in the in terms of colours, lights and pretty things in the sky, which surely is the best part. It is all just loud noises for an extended period of time. Apparently they are used as a kind of symbolic thing when opening a new shop or restaurant to scare bad spirits away, which is all fair enough, but you do have to question what kind of establishments are opening their doors for the first time at midnight and which particular bad spirits they have to be concerned about.

On a vaguely related note, there is due to be a smoking ban in China in all public places from May 1st. For the record, this is like trying to ban drinking in pubs, football in football stadiums or mindless violence in Yates', in that it absolutely can't/won't happen. As a non-smoker I was very much in a minority in being against the smoking ban when it came in, in England. Now, I accept that I was completely wrong and that almost everywhere - the toilets at half-time at Goodison Park being the exception - is better for it. Being here only makes me realise just how much of a difference it actually makes because almost every man I have seen in any cafe, bar or restaurant smokes and whilst it's not something I enjoy or even consider to be pleasant anymore in terms of atmosphere, it does make me reminisce and remember the days of waking up with clothes stinking of smoke or being in bars in Mathew Street where there were so many people doing it that your eyes stung and your throat hurt so much it felt like you were swallowing sandpaper - a glass of hot water would probably have helped then actually.

Pura Vida

Dave

* For anyone unfamiliar with British cultural phenomena of the last thirty years, they're characters from a TV show called Eastenders.

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