Phnom Penh: Reflections on the Killing Fields

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Sharing a tuk-tuk with some newfound friends, I find myself leaving Phnom Penh on a 40-45 minute trip to the Killing Fields of Choeung Ek: Between 1997-1978, during the Pol Pot regime, around 17, 000 men, women, children and babies were murdered here, after the Khmer Rouge had detained and tortured them at the infamous S21 prison in Phnom Penh city. In 1980, the remains of 8985 people were exhumed from mass graves at the site, of which there is a total of 129. Since then, the Killing Fields have become a memorial to the victims of the regime, and consequently the site has become one of the most a popular tourist destinations in all Phnom Penh, and perhaps all of Cambodia. I can’t help but find myself morally conflicted as I reflect on this: this is such a place of horror and trauma for the Cambodian nation and its people, so it is ethical for tourists to come and “consume” the site as part of their travels? And yet, on reflection, I conclude that a visit can be viewed in a highly ethical light; after all, the terrors and consequences of the Khmer Rouge regime were already largely ignored by the Western world for far too long, and the Killing Fields presents a unique opportunity to deeply and respectfully learn about, and hence learn from,<em style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> this dark period in Cambodia’s recent past.

Indeed, as I arrive and walk through the site, listening to the headset that provides a comprehensive audio tour, I am so grateful and thankful that I came. Though I am shaken to my very soul to see and hear about the atrocities that occurred, it endlessly enhances my appreciation for the perseverance, tenacity, integrity, and hope of the Cambodian people. As continue walking, I notice a rice farm that lies directly adjacent to the site. As I look out, I suddenly see a group of around seven children laughing, running, and playing within the field. At the same time, I hear a class of children repeating Khmer words in chorus, from what must be a near-by school. And as we ride in the tuk-tuk on the return journey to Phnom Penh, more children play on the streets and wave to us with cheerful and cheeky grins. Just as a rainbow after a storm, how beautiful is the sound of young children’s joyful voices after a tumultuous past...

A torrent of emotions therefore rushes within my on this return journey: I feel shattered, yet reinvigorated; utterly harrowed, yet filled with hope. If you’ll forgive the romanticisation, I can’t help but feel as if I’ve just straddled the space between past and present, death and life. It’s almost impossible to comprehend that while much of the rest of the world was enjoying 1970s disco music, flared pants and long hair-cuts, Cambodia was facing its darkest hour...And yet, from the midst of this darkness, has come light, healing, and hope for the future. It’s one of the most beautiful things the human race has done and continues to do as best we can: to see the light at the end of the tunnel, pave the way for future hope and change, but not forgetting to respect and reflect on the darkness that brought us here. This is manifested in many shapes and forms, and I found a visit to the Killing Fields to be one of the most poignant and precious of these, for which I am truly thankful. As we look towards the future, may we never forget to look back at the past with upmost respect and a contrite heart. But as we dwell on the past, may we also have the strength to look towards the future with eyes that are older and wiser, but simultaneously filled with a fresh, and youthful hope.

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