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Published: July 25th 2016
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When we arrived on site we did not see the group of women who greeted us each morning with song. We quickly learned that an older woman from the village died during the night, a relative of one of the families whose home we built. Normally following a death, the entire village spends the time in mourning until the following day when the village buries the individual. Despite the tradition of everything but essentials ceasing in the village, the chief and other leaders of the village decided to let us continue building. They thought that our work was valuable and knew that we could likely finish everything we could do by the end of the day. In return, we committed to respecting the somberness of the village and to not engage in loud games (soccer and duck duck goose) with the children.
Since we spent most of the day on scaffolding finishing the walls, we could see large swaths of the village and how the people cared for the family whose loved one died. A different group of women gathered in the center of the village and began singing spirituals in the native language. These women, from a local church
that the deceased women belonged to, slowly processed to the house. Upon arrival, they sang outside the front door for a bit before sitting on the front porch with their back to the door. A group of men would occasionally take turns and sing before the women would start singing again.
Different people from the village would take turns sitting vigil on the front porch of the house of the deceased. The women often sat in the front while the men sat along the side of the house. Half of our group, led by our two team leaders, sat for a few minutes on the porch of the house, where they could here the wailing of the loved ones. The group shared their condolences before returning to the house they were working on that day. Our hosts, Faith and Chifundo (which means mercy), shared that the singing and sitting vigil would continue until the time for the funeral, which would take place Friday at 3pm. A simple coffin would be built of whatever wood could be found. At 3pm, the village would gather under the big tree in the center of the village for prayers before processing down to the cemetery for burial of the body which would be wrapped in a linen cloth and placed in the coffin. Afterward everyone would return to their homes and continue to quietness. The length of mourning beyond this point would vary based on the desire of the family and conversation with the chief.
The entire funeral and mourning period remain sorrowful and subdued. Unlike some funerals in the United States, there would be no celebration of life. While my heart aches for the family whose grandmother died in the night, it was an honor to be able to see firsthand how a village grieves the death of one of its members. Life is filled with both highs and lows and we had the privilege of seeing and being part of both. Grateful for Chifundo and Faith for helping us understand the process so we could be as respectful as possible during the sad time in the village.
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