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Published: July 28th 2008
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Mr Alan
Weakness: Bedele Special The Unusual Suspects It seems it was over before it even began. The bags have been packed, the meters read, the crockery half-inched and the great Assosa exodus is complete. Even Marta, the final straggler bade farewell two weeks ago leaving just four Ferengi survivors in this part of Beneshangul-Gumuz.
So who were they, these intrepid Eleven, flung together as friends through circumstance for a brief but bright gathering on the extremes of Ethiopia's western borders?
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Mr Alan Skills - Evil Computer Genius
Weapon of Choice - T15 Torque Driver
Known Accomplice(s) - Princess Zara-Margaret (Wife)
Previous Life - IT Security/Networks Manager, Financial Services, UK.
Last known whereabouts - 'Fixing' PCs at the Regional Capacity Building Coordination Bureau.
Bob Skills - Demolitions Guy.
Weapon of Choice - Kerosene burner
Known Accomplice(s) - Pascal & Gerry
Previous Life - Kenya, occupation unknown.
Last known whereabouts - Recalled from Gumuz-orientated NGO in Assosa and now posted to Youth Development work in Addis.
Dee-Ana Skills - Monitoring & Evaluation
Weapon of Choice - Sawn-off empty Pringles carton.
Known Accomplice(s) - Marta, her housemate.
Previous Life - Civil Service, London
Last Kerosene Bob
Weakness: Red wine mixed with Coca-Cola known whereabouts - Recalled from Capacity Building to Addis before returning to UK. Posting to Mombasa, Kenya pending.
Missy Ellie Skills - Cunning Linguist
Weapon of Choice - Harsh words
Known Accomplice(s) - Marc (Fiance)
Previous Life - Marketing, Germany
Last known whereabouts - Recalled from Management Institute in Assosa, brief operation in Bahir Dar, before heading back to Europe.
Gerry Skills - Lethal Martial Artist
Weapon of Choice - Bamboo stick
Known Accomplice(s) - Pascal & Kerosene Bob
Previous Life - Finance, Phillipines
Last known whereabouts - Recalled from Micro Finance Bureau in Assosa. Now working out of Addis, placement to be confirmed.
Les-Li Skills - Tactical Expert
Weapon of Choice - Poisoned home-made lemon squash
Known Accomplice(s) - Worku, the Day/Night Guard
Previous Life - Headmistress, UK.
Last known whereabouts - Doing something educational at the Regional Education Bureau, Assosa.
Marc Skills - Vehicles Expert
Weapon of Choice - Bike wrench & soldiering iron
Known Accomplice(s) - Missy Ellie (Fiance)
Previous Life - IT, Germany.
Last known whereabouts - Recalled from Management Institute in Assosa, ran a cell in Bahir Dar, before heading back to Europe.
Marta Dee-Ana
Weakness: Cheese & Chive Pringles Skills - Mapping & Outdoor Terrain Expert
Weapon of Choice - Headscarf garotte
Known Accomplice(s) - Dee-Ana, Housemate
Previous Life - Teaching English, London.
Last known whereabouts - Recalled from Regional Education Bureau, went underground in Gilgel Beles before dropping off radar in Northern Ethiopia. Thought to be heading back to the UK.
Pascal Skills - Financial Genius
Weapon of Choice - Complex Mathematical Formulae
Known Accomplice(s) - Gerry & Kerosene Bob
Previous Life - Making money, Kenya.
Last known whereabouts - Recalled from Bureau of Finance & Economic Development. Currently lying low in Kenya pending future operations.
Princess Zara-Margaret Skills - Planning & Running Operations
Weapon of Choice - Virus-infected USB stick
Known Accomplice(s) - Mr Alan (Husband)
Previous Life - Communications, UK.
Last known whereabouts - Planning Global World Domination from the Regional Education Bureau, Assosa.
Steven Skills - Musical Genius
Weapon of Choice - External Hard Disk loaded with MP3s
Known Accomplice(s) - Works alone
Previous Life - IT, UK.
Last known whereabouts - Downloading a Windows Vista Upgrade at the Regional Education Bureau, Assosa.
Skweakah Skills - Catching rats & begging food
Weapon of Missy Ellie
Weakness: Yemenese Bread Choice - Pathetic mew
Known Accomplice(s) - Two scrawny kittens (identity unknown)
Previous Life - Stray cat, Assosa
Last known whereabouts - Pushing up sunflowers, Mr Alan & Princess Zara's garden.
ALL SUSPECTS HAVE ATTENDED THE HARBORNE HALL (OR EQUIVALENT) TRAINING FACILITIES AND SHOULD BE CONSIDERED EXTREMELY DANGEROUS!
If approached by suspect, consider bribery attempt using carefully identified weaknesses.
Good luck!
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Diana
non-member comment
Hiya
Hi there,not sure about the photobut good to catch up on where we are all at now. Like the - pringles reference! :-)