It was the best of times...

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...and it was the worst of times.

We have been back in Assosa for a few weeks now and life has returned to a sort of normality. There are far fewer VSOs here now, only 4 have been allowed back and Lesley has been on a sight-seeing trip around the north of Ethiopia for that last 2 or 3 weeks anyway. We have struck up a friendship with three 'new' Ferengis working on a water project funded by the Finish government - Harriet, Judith and Antero.

We also had a really nice evening catching up with Paul and Courtney, two Americans come to project manage the building of a new hospital in Kamashi. They have their work cut out, plus in Kamashi there is rarely any electricity (none for the last 4 weeks by all accounts), running water from public standpipes only and mobile phones don't work. Well that's a lie actually - there is one tree on a hill that with a bit of luck and a forward wind you can stand under and get a few bars of mobile signal. If you go to Kamashi and see a group of people gathered under a tree waving their mobiles around you know exactly what they are doing...

So back to the Addis exile, part II.

Addis is great for a couple of weeks. You get to see your VSO buddies, eat Ferengi food, buy the odd bits and pieces for the house that you can't get in Assosa and then you go home. Unfortunately in our case we could not.

Living in a hotel, out of a suitcase, having to eat out for every meal and drinking only bottled water becomes a real drag after a couple of weeks. We had no idea if or when we would be allowed back to Assosa, I had no laptop with me, no flash drives or external disks, no access my TV shows or films I downloaded through bit torrent before we left the UK. We couldn't even do those jobs that you had been putting off until a rainy day, like cataloging all the photos we had taken, doing blog updates from our field trip and so on that would have been ideal to fill up the dead time.

To be fair, VSO tried to keep us busy. Marc had gone to Gilgel Beles, via Bahir Dar with Marta - Marc to help fix the virus-ridden PCs at the Teacher Training College and Marta to help set up the English Language Improvement Programme (ELIP). Steven had decided to work for an NGO down on Hiya Hulet, electricity permitting, where he was pleasantly surprised to find broadband wireless internet and Sara has chosen to look into the Environmental elements of the VSOE Strategic Plan for Ethiopia that was currently being rewritten. Other volunteers had been given odd jobs around the new country Strategic Plan or updating the Ethiopian section on VolZone (the Volunteer resource web site).

I had been keeping myself busy anyway, in between power cuts, by taking the 5 old PCs in the volunteer room of the Programme Office to pieces and trying to rebuild two working desktops for volunteers to use. After several technically challenging days I was pleased to report two, slow but working, desktop PCs ready and waiting to allow fellow VSOs to use webmail and read/create office documents. How long they will remain functional is anyone's guess - I restricted the PCs as much as I could to prevent viruses but within days other VSOs were busy trying to circumvent the restrictions and install new software...

Then VSO assigned me the task of looking at the current diabolical speed of their office Internet connection. That's another story that will probably only interest techie nerds but for my part it allowed me to investigate some of the other communications offerings from Ethiopia Telecom and do some deeper research into VSAT satellite network technologies.

The worst of times?

The uncertainty around our future. Would we go back to Assosa? Would we get sent back to the UK? Or would we have to abandon our friends in Assosa and our newly painted and fenced house (home) for another placement in Ethiopia? After 3 or so months in Assosa we had just started to get a feel for the town and our placements and were looking to push on with our plans and objectives. It would be such a shame to have to start all over again.

We had meetings with Patricia, the British Embassy (where the military attache DID spoil us with his wife's home made flapjack!), Galeta the new VSO security guy and our Programme Manager. They all in turn spoke to the IRC (International Rescue) and the UN. We spoke to friends back in Assosa. We all met again.

After three weeks in limbo it was finally decided to only allow 4 (of the 11) volunteers back, who would go and pack up everyone else's house and test the water for 5 or 6 days, before reporting back to Addis. All Assosan volunteers in Addis were interviewed to identify who wanted to go back and of those, who were allowed to go back. It was quite a stressful time for all. Some volunteers seemed to want to beat their drums loudly about how badly Assosa would miss them if they were not allowed back, some just gave up and said they'd rather take a placement elsewhere. We had been told that the 4 or 5 allowed back permanently could expect to be recalled to Addis at any time and that if they chose to sign up for Assosa again then they would also be signing up for a period of uncertainty.

With Marta working in Gilgel Beles it meant only 4 volunteers - Steven, Lesley and us two - expressed a preference to go back anyway. It was therefore agreed that we would fly on the Thursday and come back on the Sunday, having packed up both Gerry and Pascal's and Marc and Ellie's house. But unfortunately the flights were now fully booked until the following Tuesday so we had another week of waiting in Addis. Oh dear.

Then after 5 days of rushing around clearing out houses, shifting furniture (as no VSO staff were allowed to travel to Assosa, so we had to do it ourselves), trying to grab/pay utilities bills, locking up, handing keys back AND speaking to as many people as we could about the situation in the town, we headed back to the airport with an unfeasably huge number of bags, boxes, bikes and guitars, only to hear, while we pulled up at the airport (more sedately this time), that overnight three volunteers in Addis had been injured by a drunk driver and Dave had been killed.

Our flight back was really not a happy one. We had understandably cancelled our planned 'farewell to Assosa' party at Delicious Dishes that night and instead all the Assosan volunteers, including Marta, who was back from Gigel, had a subdued final meal in the resturant at the Yonas.

My earlier blogs have talked about Dave so I won't repeat myself.

The latest update is that Holly, Pam and Oscar have made good recoveries and have been repatriated to England, Oz and the Phillipines. Dave's funeral took

place in England and two Addis volunteers, Allan and Gordon, attended. They paid for the trip themselves as VSO would not pay, though the VSO head honcho was there.

Those of us who knew Dave were pleased that the Ethiopian volunteers would be represented and both Gordon and Allan passed back news of the ceremony and subsequent wake. Apparently they got to go to Dave's old school and tell his schoolkids how much he had enjoyed his time in Ethiopia and they also visited one of his favourite pubs and met his family. It seems clear that it did the world of good for Allan and Gordon (and us by proxy) to meet the people from his 'other life' in the UK and for these people, Dave's friends and family, in turn to meet Dave's friends from his life in Ethiopia. Allan and Gordon took the book of rememberance that VSO Ethiopia and the volunteers had put together, as well as the book of photographs that had been collected. Allan forwarded me a lovely email from a woman who had been one of Dave's walking buddies back in the UK.

Sometimes I still feel a down about Dave and feel guilty about writing jokey blog entries about our time in Addis so soon after the accident. But I guess you tend to shove things under the carpet and just get on with life.

Anyway, Dave was a keen blogger (I never knew!) so I will press on and try and write on in the happy spirit with which he lived his life. In fact my buddy Joestar sent me this great little video that I play whenever I need to cheer myself up. Took about a week to download at the wrong end of a 56k modem but it was worth it. Shame this Matt guy never made it to Ethiopia - I'm sure some shoulder dancing and 'gouraggie' (?) would go down a treat on one of his dancing videos.

The best of times

No, Addis was not all bad. We had some great times. Drinking good coffee, eating cakes, drinking good wine, munching on pizza, shopping, browsing bookshops, reading books, seeing sights, going to parties, watching movies, catching Euro 2008 matches on TV and even going to the ballet!

After saying goodbye to Antennah we had the HIV & AIDS Workshop at the Global Hotel, out on the road to Debre Zeit. We took a contract cab as none of us were line taxi superstars (yet!) and time was against us sucessfully catching 2 line cabs to the hotel. We of course made the old Addis contract taxi mistake of agreeing a fare up front but then not paying immediately. Often the drivers agree a fare of say 60 birr and then when you arrive they say they made a mistake or they 'got a ticket for going through a red light' and the cost has suddenly gone up to 70 or 80 birr! You argue and complain but ultimately they usually get their 'tip' as you don't want to be a Ferengi making a scene. Besides, 'taxing' Ferengi is fair game. We are all rich after all 😉

We were asked to take our counterparts and Bekema was in Addis on an IT training course so he was able to moonlight for a day at the workshop (earning himself a great little Per Diem to boot!). The workshop was very, very interesting. We found out a few truths about HIV & AIDS in Ethiopia. In urban areas the reported infection rate is as high as 1 person in 10 - which is a very worrying statistic indeed. Even more worrying were some of the myths that people in Ethiopia believe about HIV & AIDS. Here are a few; you can't catch HIV after midnight; you can't catch HIV off a Ferengi; sleeping with a Ferengi will cure you of HIV!

Some of the practices are a bit worrying too. One group from a University suggested that HIV & AIDS rates were not improved by infection from STG (Sexually Transmitted Grades). Women sleeping with male lecturers to improve their grades, or worse, being required to sleep with teachers to avoid bad grades). Bekema also talked about the bars in Assosa that all the civil servants go and spend their money once they have been paid. Apparently Assosa, as a border town, attracts migrant workers who end up in the sex trade. The village girls that walk 20km with wood on their backs to sell in the market might get asked if they want to 'spend the night' in the town rather than walk 20km home. All of these snippits of information were coming from Ethiopian counterparts and not Ferengi 'experts' in HIV & AIDS. It was quite an eye opener! We have no HIV & AIDS policy at the Capacity Building Bureau and I was given an information pack to help me try and influence the powers that be to set one up.

AIDS is a disease that typically affects sexually active adults, i.e. those that are doing work, having babies and producing the next generation of Ethiopians. Given that the average Ethiopian only lives to somewhere around 45 years old, it means that without attention the productive, tax paying adults within the society are wiped out, leaving a nation of children (many orphans) and a smattering of old people.

Something else we found out was that George Bush recently launched a huge program of aid to tackle HIV & AIDS globally; the biggest amount of money ever pledged by one country to address the problem. Millions, if not billions of dollars. The problem is that it is only available to progams that promote abstinence as the ONLY way to avoid catching HIV & AIDS. Countries and NGOs cannot apply for the money if they also promote safe sex (with a condom) as a way of avoiding the disease!

Clearly this is completely unrealistic and yet another example of 'bad aid' to the developing world. A solid programme of HIV & AIDS awareness includes all the ways of avoiding infection, including safe sex. The world doesn't conform to middle American/England Christian values when it comes to sex; and in many countries women do not have the same rights as do women in the USA/UK/Europe. To expect men and women of the world to remain virgins until marriage and then faithful after marriage is total fantasy. We were taught about the ABC of prevention (Abstinance, Be faithful and use a Condom) a far more realistic approach to the global problem.

Anyway I am surely oversimplifying a massively complex issue - we only had a 1 day workshop - but two of the key themes that all VSOs are required to incorporate in their work worldwide are HIV & AIDS and gender issues. I will certainly be thinking hard how I can incorporate some HIV & AIDS awareness into my work at the Bureau.

OK, sorry, I'm dwelling on another dificult subject. It's hard not to over here. You wake up on a Sunday morning in a comfortable house and make yourself a lazy fried egg breakfast, turn on the BBC World Service and sit on the sofa while the sunlight streams in through the window. Another great day ahead...

Then you hear a noise and its a scabby, starving, emaciated dog hunting through the vegetable scraps in your back garden who scampers off with a whimper through the unfeasibly small gap under your corregated iron gate. You start to feel sorry for the poor animal when a severely ill woman with a hugely swollen neck knocks on your gate desperately trying to sell some of the injera she had made, just to make enough money to buy something else to go with it. You realise once again that you are in Africa. Life is a struggle for 99.9% of the people and animals here. We are lucky. We have our UK savings if necessary, we have a good local civil service wage, we have one of the better government houses in the town, we have mobile phones, email, computers, insurance policies and the safety net of medical evacuation and repatriation.

Happy Birthday To YOU!

One of the highlights of the first week in Addis was Sara's birthday! Of course, as the Ethiopian calendar is 7 years behind the western calendar she was delighted to celebrate her 29th birthday once again!

We all went out to Delicious Dishes and they put on a log fire outside. Apart from Gerry and Pascal, everyone from Assosa made it and although we didn't know it at the time, it turned out to be the last time most of us were together in one place. It was certainly the last time I saw Marc, who went off to Gigel Beles the following day and subsequently ended up in Bahir Dar before he flies back to Germany on the 17th July.

The night ended with an odd encounter. A drunk Canadian guy wandered into the compound and asked us if anyone could speak English and did they have a mobile phone? His story was he had arrived in Addis earlier in the day and was meant to be staying with his buddy somewhere past the maternity hospital on Hiya Hulet. He must have been delayed by the lure of jambo and St George and now it was very late he didn't have a clue where he was or where he should be going.

All he had was a mobile number written on the back of his hand!

I didn't lend him my phone as Karin in Nekemte had recently lost his in a scam. You lend someone your mobile just for a quick 'emergency' call when they claim the reception here is poor and wander off to get a better signal. And that's the last you see of them and your mobile phone 😊

I did call his buddy and got directions to the guy's guesthouse. No idea if he made it! It didn't look promising.

Is this place bigger than Assosa?

Erm...yes.

It has line taxis not three-wheeled tuk-tuks.

My first words after getting off the bus in Debre Zeit. We had just had a 2 hour bus journey south east out of Addis towards Nazaret (Adama) and Harar.

Bekema had offered to take us out for a daytrip on the Sunday and Debre Zeit was the intended destination. Renowned as a holiday resort with some amazing volcanic lakes we were more than happy to check it out. Particularly when Sara found out that part of the journey required a horse and cart. I was less enthusiastic as me and horses have never really got on. Besides, I always felt it was a bit cruel to subject another animal to carrying my weight. "But they LOVE it", the horsey people say. Hmm. When your bandy little legs, covered with sores and flies are struggling to propel your skinny carcass forward, I'm not sure you really want to be dragging the weight of 2 Habashas and 2 Ferengis as well! Particularly down hill.

Regardless, first up we made a line taxi trip to the end of the line, past the local Vetinary college where Bekemas brother trained and the Ethiopian Airforce Officers club (complete with swimming pool). Next up the horse and cart to the first lake. Bekema had to walk for a few hundred yards until round a bend as only 3 people maximum are allowed on a horse-drawn cart. Once out of sight of the local copper Bekema hopped on board and off we went.

The day was a bit overcast but nevertheless the lakes were impressive. In a landlocked country (since Eritrea split from Ethiopia) any body of water has a special attraction to the locals and the shoreline was busy with people swimming, sailing, fishing and just chilling to loud music.

Unfortunately, being a Sunday, there was the higher than usual number of young males who had been drinking and chewing chat all day, so we were lucky we had Bekema as our guide; otherwise we would have been the centre of attention. A few enterprising youths tried to claim that "entry" into the lakes was 20 birr a head but given they were sitting next to a half-finished crate of St George beer, we took it to be the scam it clearly was.

I have to say it was the first time ever in Ethiopia that my 'bad vibes' radar went off and I was happy to move on quickly. I'd had it before as a Ferengi in parts of Jerusalem, the West Bank and South Africa...

Time for a sharp exit.

We headed upwards away from the lake and on to what could only be described as an English country lane. The hedgerows, the overcast sky, even the birds seemed curiously familar. Until, that is, we wandered past a 15 foot high cactus plant...

Another horse and cart trip later - which I am sure we could have done quicker (and less painfully for the horse) on foot, we were back in 'town' and at a nice little hotel overlooking another of the lakes. We had walked past and could see exclusive looking homes built upon the shoreline of the lakes - owned, Bekema said, by Ethiopian musicians who had made it good, moved to America and maintained a holiday home in Ethiopia. The perfect place - lakeside and just over an hour in a decent 4x4 from Addis.

Off again in another horse and trap. This time to another lake and an uber-exclusive country club and lodge that prided itself in environmental friendliness. That said, we received some less than friendly looks from the guards as we arrived in an environmentally friendly horse and cart. Clearly, given the gleaming assembledge in the car park, most of the usual eco-loving punters arrive in 8 cyclinder BMW 4x4s and SUVs.

We were given the (admitedly) very polite good news at reception that membership was a mere 3,000 birr (2 months salary) but they would do us a day membership which included a free cup of tea for 200 birr. As it was 3.30pm already and by way of comparison the bus journey from Addis was 16 birr, we thought the money could be better spent elsewhere.

Fortunately the horse and trap driver was still refuelling (the horse was munching away happily on the lush lakeside grass) so we hopped on board and back to town, just in time to buy our first Ethiopian punnet of strawberries!

The bus ride home was memorable for three reasons. Firstly I reckon we had possibly picked the slowest moving bus south of Egypt.

Then the driver decided he would try and break the record for most paying customers ever fitted into a corporation bus (even though we were stopped by both traffic police and federal police).

And finally two women in the back seat (next to Bekema) kept us amused and perplexed with constant stream of jibber-jabber aimed at each other that culminated in what appeared to be a seizure or fit as we entered Addis via the Debre Zeit road.

We assumed that one woman was about to have a baby and was being nursed through the achingly slow 3 hour bus ride to hospital to give birth in Addis.

Bekema, looking confused, later explained to us concerned Ferengis that, no, neither were pregnant. They were actually having a long running, heated and theatrical debate over some money that one owed the other! He suspected they were both bar girls (hookers) as he had heard them utter some of the choicest swear words that he had ever heard - and this from a man who's Dad owns two bars!

Dum Diddle Lum Dum, Dum Da Dum. Dum Diddle Lum Dum, Dum Da Dum-Dum-DUM

We saw it. In all its glory. Indiana Jones is back and it was great. Any film (spolier warning) that has the hero survive a nuclear explosion inside a flying kitchen fridge is going down as a classic in my books. Even outdid Arnie's 'duck and cover' in a mud ditch in Predator and was cheesier than the same's kiss with Jamie Lee Curtis as a mushroom cloud erupts behind them in True Lies...

But better than the first couple of Indy films? No.

Bit like the second batch of Star Wars movies. I guess you watch them as an adult, rather than a kid and it's just that little bit harder to suspend the disbelief. But it passed a pleasant afternoon in Addis which was followed by several metres of beer in the 'Beer Garden' pub just down the road.

We also got to experience cinema, Ethiopian style.

You pick your seat when you purchase tickets, a bit like on-line check-in, but at the ticket booth. The assistant just swivelled the screen round and you pointed out your choice. You then hung around for 30+ minutes while the previous viewing empties and the floors are swept clean before a full monty 'bum rush' as the doors open.

Within 2 minutes of the doors opening the film starts so if you snooze you lose. There is no real indictaion which of the two doors will open first and I guess it provides the cinema staff with a few chuckles to open the 'wrong' door. Those who know the routine all huddle around the main entry door, feverishly chewing their popcorn, looking around to spot likely contenders when the doors finally open.

Of course, whatever door they pick, the cinema staff open the other and all hell breaks out as people waving tickets surge forward and the slow, the elderly and the children are trodden into a carpet of missed-mouth popcorn in the effort to get seated before the opening credits roll.

Even your man Indy would have worked up a sweat 😉

I married a geek

OK. I know it.

We went to the Mega Books bookshop and I bought a book on Network Cabling, Electrical Power Generation and the seminal book on mobile phone technology by William Lee. Even my justification that I had been meaning to buy the mobile phone book in the UK but it was £60 and here it was £4.50 cut no ice.

I married a chick

OK. I know it.

The Italian Embassy was putting on a free ballet at the National Theatre to celebrate 'Italian Day' or whatever and we had to go.

To be fair, I usually don't mind these things. They usually are a lot better once you get there. In fact it was great. Free to the public I was pleased to have had my shoes shined as we got there early to get a good seat (no cinema-esq pre-event reservation) and a well-mannered and well-dressed scrum to gain entry was predicted. In fact we arrived at the same time as the guests and I was asked if I was 'with the Ambassador's party?'.

Unfortunately I am a bad liar and so disappointed the inquisitor by admitting my proletariat standing - resulting in a 'oh that way somewhere' dismissal to the public seating.

I really can't claim to be any expert in the finer arts of dance but a number of the pieces were really very good. Even if you can't understand or admire the moves you can recognise the hard work and professionalism that goes into a 10 minute dance.

The audience was a truely mixed bag. I've not been in a room full of so many Ferengi since leaving the UK. Most of them poshed up (VSO excepted) and doing the la-de-da-ing as diplomats, businessmen and genuine guests of the Ambassador. The rest of the crowd were local Ethiopians, which was great. I'm not sure that some knew what to expect as there was a group of young lads behind who seemed delighted by the apparent state of undress of the female dancers and greatly amused by the skin tight bulging packets of their male equivalents.

Why not though? Who cares what level they enjoyed it on, so long as they enjoyed it!

The Good News

So what else? We drank good imported South African wine. And some bad South African imported wine. We ate some fantastic chocloate doughnuts. We went to a couple of good VSO parties and even a fundraising dinner to save Addis from the 'festel' (plastic bags) that litter parts of town and seem to be issued religiously with even the smallest shopping purchase.

I even spent 3 days trying to import some Cisco networking equipment I had bought on eBay from the states and had been stuck in customs at the central Addis for over a month waiting for collection. That story is one best saved for later when I have more energy and regained the will to live. It's one to warm the cockles of the heart of every beaurocrat around the globe so in true beaurocratic fashion, you can wait...or apply in writing to the usual email address 😊

And the good news?

We are back in Assosa, hopefully for good.

And the power cuts officially finished on Tuesday...

...apart from the one on Tuesday afternoon, Thursday night and all day Friday...

And just to challenge those of us living in government housing the builders of the new dirt road through our estate has sliced through the water main and we are without water for at least a week!

But, hey! so what?

Like Indy we still got the kitchen fridge...

😊

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Photos

Gordon, Al and Dave
Thanks, Kerry, for the picture.

Birfday Girl
...and who's that handsome fella next to her?

Di and 'Kerosene Bob'
Addis Exiles in arms.

Ellie and Our Lesley
Ahh, what a nice piccie!

Marc & Ellie
Still smiling and soon to be..shhh, I won't spoil the surprise!

What is it about VSOs?
There's always booze in the pictures??

What Steven said to Ruth?
Answers on a postcard please.

Hello Monkey Pants!
Now Mr & Mrs Aynsley :)

Delicious Dishes
So that's where the neighbour's fence got to...

Addis 5k, 10k or half marathon?
Can't read Amharic so haven't got a clue!

Sa's new motor
1 brake horse power & 20 miles to the apple

View from the cockpit
Lewis Hamilton, eat my dust.

Debre Zeit lake
Just don't mention the crocodiles.

Eh? This ain't Ethiopia?
Looks like the green, green grass of home!

Erm..
...is this the road to Compton Dando?

OK, maybe not...
Sa-ra! I think this one needs re-potting?

Arty shot
One for the TravelBlog connoisseur.

Here's another...
Just to prove the first one wasn't a fluke.

Sara & Bekema
Discussing t'eff, the stuff they make injera out of

A picture of a horse's arse...
...but nice hills in the background

Bag 'em & tag 'em
The Assosa Exodus begins

Brolly, bike and banjo
Don't leave home without them...

200kgs of excess baggage?
Might have trouble blagging your way past the check-in desk.