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Published: April 7th 2006
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Traveling in Egypt is a game of patience and humility. When riding the overnight bus from Hurghada to Aswan remember to hold on to all 14 ticket stubs that they give you so that you can show the fare collector who comes back to check by waking you up at 1am and every 45 mins thereafter. Show them only 13 slips and you got some 'splaining to do. When riding the train from Aswan to Luxor remember to sit away from the window to avoid the shattering of glass when you pass by small villages and the children start hurling stones at the carriage. And if you plan on taking a charter bus to Abu Simbel get to bed by 6pm the night before so you can wake up at the fixed 3am departure time to line up for the police-enforced convoy. Because of a string of terrorist attacks along the Luxor-Aswan route within the last decade, National Security has made it where all foreigners are accounted for when wandering this section of the Nile Valley. At the entrance to the highway all vehicles line up at the appointed 4:30am time and what transpires is a bit like Nascar. Cars get
into starting position, the gate goes up and the race begins. Accidents are not uncommon as charter vehicles try to get to the site as early as possible to allow their customers enough time. Luckily our driver couldn't give two shits about how much time we spent there so calmly sang along to the radio as all others sped by. We still had 2 hours at Abu Simbel which was more than enough time.
Just to be clear, I don't mean to get down on these blogs as it's not how we want to portray Egypt. It's really one of the highlights of our trip and is the exact kick in the ass that we needed to keep going. The sites are spellbinding and the people are ridiculously friendly. There's this scene in "Coming to America," where Eddie Murphy stands up in a crowded NY subway and professes his love for his girlfriend whereupon fellow straphangers offer their encouragement and vocal support in a heartwarming display of communal fellowship. I always thought this scene laughable as if you'd truly made a scene on the A train you'd be ordered to to shut the f up and if people were
to band together it would only be to throw batteries at you. Neighborly camraderie- I thought it was only in movies. But this sort of thing really exists in Egypt. Carolee and I try to take the public bus in most of the cities we travel in as it puts you in touch with the common man (mah peoples), so we fumble our way around inevitably soliciting a stranger for help. In China, you point to your destination on a map and someone will try their best to direct you. In India, there will be a guy who notices the panic on your face and offer you advice before you even ask. In Egypt, you get on the bus and 9 people will ask where you're going, argue amongst themselves about the best way to get there then count down with you how many more stops until yours. It's truly a welcoming culture. Our complaints were only because the first few places obviously weren't highlights. Alexandria was our first city and first cities are always too intimidating. Cairo was a bit mechanical with its blueprint tour route. The Aqaba Coast in Sinai was just Europe in Africa (or is it
the Middle East?). But now we get to the good stuff.
The ruins of the Nile Valley. This is how we pictured Egypt and it is doesn't disappoint. Aswan is the southern most city in Egypt and claims to be the most scenic location on the Nile. For this reason the order of the day is a felucca trip (a large-masted sailing ship that can be taken for an evening cruise or a 3 day adventure up to Luxor). If you didn't know this was the thing to do in Aswan, the 80 captains along the shore will help to remind you, and add that their felucca is available and at the cheapest price! This will sound disappointing but our Rough Guide scared us enough about negotiating for a felucca that we didn't bother. That, and having done a river tour on the Li in China, and Kerala in India convinced us we weren't missing anything. Yes, this was the mighty Nile but we took a ferry across which sufficed for time on the water. Elephantine Island is just 300m across the river and is worth a visit. If taking the public ferry, don't pay attention to the ferry
operator who suggests a fare of 15 pounds. Our Rough Guide stated 25 piastres (1/4 of an Egyptian Pound)- at disembarkation, we handed him 1 EL and got off without argument. On the island, the museum is crap (comparable to a 4th Grade Science Fair complete with misspelled labels), but you have to buy a ticket to gain access to the Yebu ruins just behind which are not crap. This was the first time we viewed ruins in their original location so were quite impressed. Aswan is also popular as it's the only gateway to Abu Simbel, 3 hrs further south where sits the famed Sun Temple built by Ramses II in tribute to the god Amun. Many critics complain that it's artificial in that the whole temple was broken down and Jenga'd back up 65m above it's original location to avoid the Nile floods when the Aswan Dam was built, but it's still impressive. Queen Nefertari's temple, a bit smaller in scale, but also good, is just to east of it. The other parts of our tour included the Aswan Dam (not worth the $1 admission fee - ask to get out of the van before it enters the
gate), and Philae Temple, the cult temple paying tribute to Osiris. A lot of folks talked this one up, which was nice but I didn't think it any better than the others.
Luxor was our next and last stop in Egypt. We only had 2 days so were hurried but were reinforced with every site we visited. Probably the best place in Egypt for us. Luxor temple in the middle of town is clearly visible from the street. We balked at the 40EL admission as "we can just take photos from the street!" But buckling under the pressure of the domineering tourist agenda, we went in and were glad we did. Obelisks, colossi, huge columns and rows of hieroglyphics-- the same as everywhere else, but for some reason much more enjoyable. The Luxor museum was also the best we'd been to. The Cairo museum gets all the international hype. The Nubian museum, the regional hype. The Alexandrian museum is pretty good but is often overlooked. But the Luxor museum we thought was the best. The museum is perfect as it has maybe less than a hundred artifacts all evenly spaced for the impatient viewer to manage. And the labels
don't require you to ingest an entire history, standing there reading for 15 minutes. Three simple statements for each exhibit-- what are you looking at? where did we find it? and what does it mean to a retard like you? End. Go to the next one. We walked out of there feeling like we actually learned something. Then onto Karnak Temple, billed as the greatest site in Egypt aside from well, you know. Went to the Sound & Light show in the evening, which was meh. The lighting effects were alright but the sound and voice-over was a bit Celine Dion-- a bit breathy and overdramatic. Next day we ferried across the Nile with rented bicycle in tow to take in the Jackpot of Pharaonic finds. Valley of the Kings, Hebu Medinet, Ramesseum, Colossi at Memnon, Valley of the Queens, Deir El Bihar, etcetera...etcetera. (ok, I had to review the Rough Guide for that list but we damn near visited all of them). Even if you can't do the half hour hike from the Kings to Deir El-Bihar, at least walk to the top of the camel path across from Tut's tomb and you'll be rewarded with a gorgeous view
of the valley.
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