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"You can pay me back later."

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Solutions to getting friends to pay back money owed without hassle?
16 years ago, February 25th 2008 No: 1 Msg: #28499  
Just curious guys...have any of you had the issue of lending friends money on long trips or even during brief travels and find it a hassle to get that money back? If you've also had this problem too in the past, how do you go about doing it? It's such an annoyance to contact everyone to have them pay back what I let them borrow down to the exact amount...especially if there are multiple people involved...any ideas? Any input is appreciated. Thanks! Reply to this

16 years ago, February 27th 2008 No: 2 Msg: #28626  
After the ship has sailed, it is likely to be tough to get it back. Guess I would make a direct comment "Say, dude, remember the 20 bucks that I lent you in Malta ?" and hope that they are shamed into paying you.

In the future, when traveling with someone or a group, have everyone contribute to a "kitty" that handles all of the common expenses. The common money is held in a little coin purse or some such.

The kitty pays for admissions, meals, hotels, gas, whatever. If someone is short of cash, they could borrow from the kitty and put in a note saying "I owe the kitty 20 bucks. Signed, Arnold". That way, they owe everyone, not just you.

Reply to this

16 years ago, February 27th 2008 No: 3 Msg: #28702  
Hello Worldguy 😊

Good luck with that one. We loaned a friend a large sum of money around 8 years ago and he still has not payed it back despite repeated remindings.
On the other hand I once loaned my sister a large sum of money. I knew she would have trouble paying it back so did not push it. Then after 5 years she suddenly gave it all back.
I would seriously advise u to be very selective about who u loan money to and accept that they may never give it back. Only loan to very good friends and family. I have had a few incidents of strangers and people I have not known for long asking me for loans. I generally turn them down if I am not willing to give it as a gift or good deed.
All u can really do is periodically remind the people u loaned money to that they still owe it.

Mel Reply to this

16 years ago, February 27th 2008 No: 4 Msg: #28726  
Thanks for the responses wanderworld and Mell.

I have actually never heard of the term "kitty" before, but it sounds like it would work well with common expenses that every shares...like fuel for gas and what not.

Mell, my friends are all good people. 😊 They are willing to pay back, but often times, small amounts owed are just forgotten, not purposely ignored.

Are any of you familiar with MoneyExchange? I'm thinking doing collecting owed money via online transfer would be a pretty easy and convenient way for my particular situation. All transfers are free and it saves me the un-needed effort of having to approach every friend in person and ask for an exact amount. Reply to this

16 years ago, February 28th 2008 No: 5 Msg: #28754  
B Posts: 11.5K
I haven't lent money to strangers before, or if I did it was not much at all.

I've lent money to friends before and felt a bit akward about asking for it back, once a few hundred dollars which I reminded them about a couple of times then gave up on.

Money which I've lent to family members I don't push too hard to get back, if I'm ever in trouble I know they will be there for me. Eg, when my passports/travel wallet was stolen in Paris last year my sister and mother cancelled a trip to Sweden to go back to London with me because I had no source of money. I offered to pay back what their insurance didn't cover, but they wouldn't hear of it. Reply to this

16 years ago, February 28th 2008 No: 6 Msg: #28783  
Never a borrower or lender be...

I need you to pay back the full balance, today! (Sorry, that's from my script when I worked for a debt collection agency.)

I try not to lend money to anyone - and if I do, I'm not shy when it comes to asking for it back. Reply to this

16 years ago, February 28th 2008 No: 7 Msg: #28784  
HAHA, when I was travelling around Italy with two friends I had about 800 Euro's in travellers cheques on me and some cash.

Once the cash was gone I refused to cash my travellers cheques anywhere which charged a commission. I finally found an obscure bank in a little town somewhere and then had to pay back about 700 Euro's in one amount which was very annoying.

I have good friends 😊 Reply to this

16 years ago, February 28th 2008 No: 8 Msg: #28788  
B Posts: 38
One way you can do is by having the friend pays for some small things for you.

Let's say you go to a restaurant, and at the end of the meal, "Hey .. do you think you could pay for my meal for those (or part of) I let you borrow when we were in Gili Trawangan".
Or maybe hotel/hostel fee, flight to the next trip etc.

The chance is that the person forgets that s/he borrowed your money, so that would be a nice reminder to pay you back without too much confrontation.

Good luck, I know that can be annoying. Reply to this

16 years ago, February 29th 2008 No: 9 Msg: #28831  
When i was in Panama city an aquitance owed me some cash from a meal and so we went to a bar and he got me my drinks, so sometimes its easy enough to say forget giving me that 10 bucks back you can get the next round or whatever, its an easy way of asking without being too blunt. Reply to this

16 years ago, February 29th 2008 No: 10 Msg: #28859  
B Posts: 455
I find time is the key factor here... there's a window of opportunity and past then it becomes a little awkward to ask...

If it's recent just remind them and say it's needed.

If it's a past lending, bring up a conversation about how someone else owes you money and hasn't paid you back, emphasisng the stress and inconvenience this is. If they remember and have any conscience they'll hopefully be guilted into offering the money. I usually then pretend to not remember they still owed me... Reply to this

16 years ago, February 29th 2008 No: 11 Msg: #28894  
Those are funny stories. Reminds me of something that I read in a Bill Bryson book recently. He wanted someone to go along with him to hike the Appalachian Trail. A buddy that he had not heard from in years called up at the last minute to ask if he could go along.

The buddy tells Bill Bryson "I started not to call because of that 600 bucks that I owe you.". Bill says "Uh, you owe me 600 bucks ? Uh, consider it forgotten."

Then Bill spends the trip wondering just whom the guy owed the money. ??? Yikes.

Those are good suggestions to work off the debt in kind - "Hey, Slick, buy us a couple of drinks and consider the 10 bucks paid in full."

Happy Leap Day

Reply to this

16 years ago, February 29th 2008 No: 12 Msg: #28895  
Somehow, I would prefer somebody I owe money to to ask me directly for it, rather than drop hints.
Chances are if I have not payed it back it would be because I forgot. I either would not understand the hints or else would feel irritated that the person wont just stay what they mean. But maybe others prefer hints. 😉

Mel Reply to this

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