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How do you define success?
A pang of doubt and "what-am-I-doing-with-life" crap suddenly filled me when I caught up with a friend and learned she's already making a name for herself along the lines of our profession. It's the same with my other batch-mates.
I could be one of them but instead chose where I am now. I often tell people that we all have different paths to follow and should not actually compare what we're doing or achieved with each other. However, I could not help at times (like right now) to feel otherwise. A friend who is somehow on a similar road as I am sent me the above message when I told her my sentiments.
How do you really measure success? Is it with what you achieve in your career? financial gains? personal life? personal happiness? etc.
Anyway, I shook it off already. I'm happily back to my old self. ;) Reply to this
In life seek happiness. Life is short and you need to make the most of it.
First I would like to state that I agree with the philosopher Dag.
You are the only one who can answer this question as it is individual for all of us.
Experiences enrich your life.
I'm in the over 50 crowd (although not but much) and have a lot to say about success and how to measure it. I was raised to grow up, work hard, save for retirement and "be successful". In my family success was measure by money and position or power. I did all those things and have been successful in my career. For the most part I have enjoyed my chosen path and have been content if not happy the majority of the time. However, with that said---in my career I've had times when I wondered "is this all there is." When you are building a career there are times when it is not as fulfilling as others. (personal opinion)..... my belief is that is why they call it work and not vacation.
Years ago I told my husband that my goal was to take a year off and travel the world before I was 50.... he laughed--- but I set the goal, began to save and that is exactly what we did. It was a magnificent experience. I cannot explain the way it has enriched and changed our lives.
But it has also made us restless and we are no longer as content doing what we were doing before our travels. The flip side to that is that we earn enough money to travel to exotic lands (when we can get off work) Looking around at friends who have lost their homes, lost their jobs, lost their savings --- I am grateful to be in my chosen field because it provides stability.
I think it is good that you have had an opportunity to compare yourself to friends----- I believe that reflection and self evaluation is vital. You may come to a cross roads when "you" want to do something different. Only you will know. Just because you take one path does not mean you need to stay on that path your entire life.
I have re-invented myself several times and it keeps me fresh.
For me, I needed financial stability and I have that......and now it allows me to travel. I personally didn't want to end up 80 years old and not have a roof over my head.
We took the trip around the world because I didn't want to be 80 years old and ask why I spent my entire life focused on my career and didn't do some travel. I did not want to have regrets.
I agree that success needs to be defined by you and not society. I found my balance and I'm certain you can find yours.
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As for myself, I was like Merry Jo. I wanted financial security and professional recognition. Once I was financially secure with a pension that would adjust for inflation, which was sufficient to take care of my family and allow me to travel, I didn't want to make more money by working more years. As for professional recognition, after retiring I found that all my awards were worthless. No one will ever see all the plaques on my office wall. Reply to this
if your dream is to sit behind a desk counting numbers and pile the money in the bank, do nothing with your life but die rich - well done you are successful
if you dream to have a comfortable life (moneywise) and travel the world whenever you can and enrich your life - well done you are successful
:) Life is what you want it to be and like the others say, only you can choose, your path to success whatever that is.... Reply to this
Success is a measurement of your happiness and fulfilment not only a career level or wealthy bank account otherwise people who do what they love and don't get paid very well would be losers and they are clearly not!!!! there is a lot of people considered very successful because of their status but they have no time, love or fiends to share this status with ;-) I admire everybody who goes against what the 'system' tells them to find their own happiness and fulfilment;-)
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Having been part of the rat race, I have found that over the years, the simpler my life becomes, the more pleasure I get out of it. I think the biggest moment of clarity came when I realised that money is actually the root of all evil and can turn the meekest of people into murdering psychopaths. On this very day, I grew up and realised that the acquisition of wealth and material possessions reduces you to nothing less than a slave to the god known as 'Money' and decided that while I might need it to survive, I was no longer going to prostrate myself before this 'god' like a drooling, sub-servant sycophant!
Now, after living in Vietnam for 2-1/2 years, I can honestly say that I have never been happier or felt more contented with my lot. I'm surrounded by people who are full of joy, who smile constantly, who take pleasure from the simpler things in life and display a nationalist fervour that puts most of us to shame. While I still do shamelessly covet my Internet connection. I don't watch TV, I don't play video games and I don't waste my time on worthless, puerile pursuits. I try instead to use my time to cultivate my garden, develop a deeper understanding of the natural world around me, communicate with others and take pleasure in life itself.
If I was to pop my clogs tomorrow, I would go knowing that deep within me, I have made something of my life and that my own personal desire to find fulfillment is something that I have worked hard for and can be proud of.
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To me Success in life should never be determined by anyone except yourself as pertaining to your personal life. Everyones definition is different because we all think differently about a wide variety of topics, I would say in my own opinion Success is defined by how truly happy you are in your life...If you want to be a millionaire and bust your but to get there and make it, that's successful, If you want to wander the earth and see some of the most amazing places and meet the most amazing people that to me is successful because you are HAPPY!!! not content with life!!
thanks everyone! Reply to this
His words all ring true.
You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for work, as it is for your lovers. Your work is gonna fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work, and the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking and don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And like any great relationship, it gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking. Don't settle.
You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something -- your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
Your time is limited so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your Heart and Intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
Steve Jobs was a visionary and left his mark on the world. Reply to this
I find myself to be absolutely astonished by the way some people have reacted to his death, you would have thought that he had found the cure for cancer or another debilitating disease. While in his earlier years, he was undoubtedly a pivotal figure in bringing computing to the masses, towards the end it seems that Steve Jobs's only dream was to keep his loyal flock of iSheeple supplied with the latest, overpriced 'must have' gadgets.
He may have been an inspiration to many, but words come cheap. Unless you go through life treating others, no matter who they are, with the respect they deserve, then I really don't think that you can say that you have succeeded at all.
Sorry if you take that to heart Steve Jobs lovers, but it IS the truth! Reply to this
In response to: Msg #139247
I guess youre friend is right, those are societies definitions of success. But everyone has different needs and wants so my definition is if you want something, you work hard and achieve it, then you are successful. That might be to own a rum shack on the beach, to be a high flying corporate lawyer or to be a stay at home mum and raise 10 children... i'm sure none of those people think the other is successful but if thats what they want to do and they are happy doing it...its all good :) So i do hope the very same for you :))) Reply to this
Tam - so true. Everyones success is different. A friend said to me yesterday she was more than happy to live vicariously through my travels and had no interest in hurtling through the skies on a banned airline before a ten hour boatride. She is a homebody and loves her life. I have often felt guilty at the people I leave behind but my kids have grown up with me travelling so just see it as something their mum does. I understand people may be worried about me, but it is their choice to worry and stress instead of having a bit of faith in my ability to get myself to and from places. I could get hit by a bus tommorow without spending airfare and doing it in a foreign country - would be a lot less hassle ;)
I dont want my last dying thought to be..I wish I hadve.
I want to live boldly and that is what makes me happy, so as Andrea pointed out..if happiness is a measure of successfulness..then I guess im on the right track. Reply to this
1) Greed is good
2) Don't give to charity
3) Be Vindictive and ruthless (fire all the employees who p*ssed you off and use slave labor )
4) Don't acknowledge the existence of your love child so you don't have to pay child support
5) Steal others ideas and take credit for it
6) Screw your friends
Four words that best describe Steve Jobs - World Class VISIONARY a$$#0!e
I can't understand why so many people look up to this guy.
Ok, he designed cool gadgets ... so ?