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Published: April 13th 2008
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Fun times.
I have the headache that hasn't gone away for 2 weeks straight...seems like the dr's are worried about me. Hence why they now have 4 vials of my blood. This is not a country made for waiting. In any form. Which I find ironic considering that technically the Jewish people have been waiting eons, I'm talking biblical years, for Israel to come to be. So maybe in a way, the lack of patience of the Israelis is a form of rebellion against time which is constantly threating to end.
I find it fascinating that on certain days of the year, such as Yom Ha'zichron and Yom Ha'shoah, the whole country will stop what they are doing and stand still as a whole for the duration of the siren. It's a collective time when this country, who so dearly hates waiting for anything, stops and stands completely and utterly still.
There is no screaming, no annoyed yells of “Hayiti po!”
(I was here!), no cutting in the line, no person who just walked in off the street and completely and utterly disregards the entire line which has formed and been waiting for God knows how long and yet cuts in front of them....none of this.
Driving is one set of angry and tense set of people. Coming up to a stoplight, everyone collectively keeps their feet on the
Dr. Hotness
If my doctor looked like this at Clalit, I'd be sick a hell of a lot more.
Yum. gas and brake at the same time because when that light even begins to turn green- you better believe you better be halfway through the intersection before 3 seconds has passed or else you fear the blaring of the horn of the person behind you. Even people on motorcycles and scooters get in on the action. There is no concept of following in a line, instead it's weaving in and out of every car until finally making it to the front of the traffic and driving before every car does.
Back in the states, when I took my motorcycle
safety course (who knew?) we were taught that we were no better, if not more vulnerable than any other car on the road. We followed in the natural traffic flow pattern and when coming to a stoplight, waited our turn. Here in Israel - you would be called a sucker for doing that. Or...possibly even get a ticket (yes, I saw that happen once). Sheesh.
So its no surprise to me today when I went in to go get a blood test that I walked into a waiting room (boy is that the wrong name for rooms here in
Exactly.
I should go around handing out these buttons to my fellow waiting room cohorts.
Give me a break people. It's too early to deal with your crap. Israel) teeming with people - all way above my age mind you. Which is another point completely - wow, I don't want to get old and be carrying my pee around with me waiting to talk to the doctor about which organ was failing now. Eww.
I had an “appointment” at 8:45am which not only doesn't mean crap to other people who also have “appointments” - it's a very loose term here in this country - but also means that in reality, I won't actually get to see the doctor or nice nurse who sucks out my blood until about, let's say....9:15am.
You have the angry pushing old people who constantly stare at you and not so covertly try to push ahead of you (age before beauty?) or who constantly ask you to the point of annoyance “When is your appointment?” and then smugly say that theirs is before yours or roll their eyes at the resignation that yes, they truly were scheduled after you and just who in the world would do such a stupid thing? Because clearly, my needs and wants do not mean anything to these grandmas and grandpa's holding their own bodily fluids in
Are they Israeli?
Nowhere else have I seen so many crotchy, I'm right, you're wrong, mean spirited brutes of old people.
Nowhere. Until I came to Israel. Do you think these 2 are from here? a cup while waiting to also get blood taken.
So what do I do? I wait. Like the good American who has always been taught to wait in line with the rest of the others. But inside I stew....or like today because it was the butt crack of dawn (at least to me that is), I just put on my ipod and zoned out all the while smiling at these grouchy old people thinking “Go ahead. Make my day. I'm too tired to even care.” and then a miracle happened:
Jessica Nicole Edwards? Po? Ahh yoffi....boi.” (Jessica, are you here? Ahh great...come!)
Hah. Take that.
I'll be going in and having my blood taken now.....ON TIME.
They say this is the holy land....and I just witnessed a miracle.
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