Platipussy Whipped

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I’ll admit it. I’ve been a bit of a whore. I’m in a new bed every night, a trail of cities in my wake. The list of places that I embraced and left is long and tragic. So many incredible towns have opened up their arms to me, only to be milked of what wanton enjoyment I can get before I mosey along. I’ve been fortunate enough to lie within some of the most desirable locales on the planet, but it happens just the same every time. At first, I’m intoxicated with the newness of every place. I lust after every inch a city has to offer. The thrill overwhelms me and I can think of nothing else that being right there in that moment in that town. Soon enough though (whether it’s two weeks, three days or overnight), that nagging voice begins to whisper once again. I can’t help but wonder what exotic new adventures lay down those roads out of town. All of a sudden, I’m at the bus station or airport, regretlessly chasing the next conquest. I get trade South American sex appeal for the sincerity of Africa then crave the sophistication of Europe only to escape to the exotic allure of Asia. Not even I know where my head will fall on a given night. But rest assured, come morning, I’ll be rambling on.
It’s important to understand that there is emotion involved. I have genuinely loved before. My little black book is peppered with places that have touched me deeply (Rio, Tokyo, Luang Prabang, BA), but I can’t get past the desire to see what other fish there are in the sea. Yes, there have been connections I’d like to change (La Paz, what was I thinking?) and even a one-night stand or two I’d take back (had to get tested after Bangkok)
I’m laying all this out there as an act of attrition. You see, I’ve come across a city that makes me consider giving up my vagabond ways. Sydney is the type of town that makes a man want to settle down.
It’s easy to understand why so many find Sydney so attractive. Her sex appeal is confronting and immediate: the sumptuous curves of the Opera House, the sparkle you see when you stare deep into those baby blue seas, her welcoming no-worries relaxed attitude, the way the supple line of her bridge lead all…the…way…downtown. (Not to mention her liberal immigration policies, hey-o)
Sydney is easy to lust over and I was enthralled from the very beginning. It was such a joy to wake up every day and see this smiling city looking back at me. This is a feeling I have felt all over the world, but this time it’s different. There’s a depth to my affection that I’ve never felt before. Rather than temper with time, my attraction grows each passing day. Sure this city is as sexy as any in the world, but there’s a depth and intelligence that is rare indeed. Never have I encountered a place with such density and variety of culture that speaks in a voice of such accessibility and warmth.
I’ve even gotten to the point where I’ve begun to love Sydney’s tiny imperfections. Idiosyncrasies that would normally be a huge turnoff are suddenly the things I love. I love the bats that fill the sky every night. I love Sydney’s over-obsession with fireworks. I find it adorable that her system of addresses is completely incomprehensible. A big part of me wants to be in for the long haul. I know that her skies may darken with pollution and she may pack on a little population. But my connection with Sydney is real. I even had her meet my parents.
Yes, family from both sides came to visit us in the way-too-long period since I last blogged. It started with a visit from Joni and Jon of the Childers clan. It’s an important element in every relationship that your special place sits right with your family (no one wants their mother thinking, “God, when is he going to break up with that bitch Paris?”) On this front, I can say Sydney charmed the hell out of the relatives. The Childri chose to come on that special holiday: Chirstmas (or as Jenny calls it: CHRISTMAS OH MY GOD CHRSITMAS. I have since learned that Jenny’s yuletide obsession is congenital.). We had our second-ever Christmas beach day in Manly, where chestnuts roast under extreme UV. Joni and Jon’s time was really a steady stream of spectacular dinners and conversation, broken up with occasional activities like wine-tasting and a cricket match (both of which I missed for work). We were sad to see the family depart, but steadied by the fact that the Bebernes gang would be joining in just a few days.
First up, though, was New Years, a day that every visitor to Sydney circles on the calendar (possibly because it’s so easy to find.) Sydney is legendary for its New Years celebration. The sight of fireworks filling the sky over the harbor is an iconic image recognizable worldwide. It seems the whole of Australia comes out for the event. The throngs pile into Darling Harbor and Circular Quay starting around 8am the day of. We chose a more relaxed, picturesque locale in Rushcutter’s Bay that only required staking out a spot nine hours in advance. Joined by Allan and Rebecca of Barrier Reef blog fame and eventually our besties Sophie and Max, we widdled the day away in a bayside park amidst heaps of joyful locals and one glittery man in a Speedo who danced inappropriately nonstop for hours. Finally, midnight arrived and the sky filled with color the likes of which I can’t accurately describe. Safe to say it was a spectacle. (It may not have surpassed our New Years in Rio, but the fact that it’s even in the conversation is a badge of honor indeed. One thing that may have hindered the event is our complete and utter sobriety. After one too many drunken sloberknockers on NYE, Sydney pulled the classic parental move saying, “OK, these few people can’t control themselves, now nobody gets to play.” Every major vantage point has a strictly enforced no alcohol policy. Viewing areas are blocked off with fences and each bag is searched by security upon entering. It does wonders for creating a safe and comfortable experience to be shared by all, but it tragically undermines one of the fundamental truths of mankind: it is more fun to watch things blow up when you are drunk.)
After a mere 24 hours of recuperation, in piled the Bebernes crew. This time my Mom, Dad, sister Jenna and brother Rod joined us. This was a big moment for me as my parents had never seen me in action on the road, an element that’s become a huge part of who I am, but they have been heretofore left time zones removed from (Mom got her first passport to come visit, now that’s a big life moment.) My family, being less inclined to extended dinner conversation and universally suffering from a genetic inability to sit still, were a bit more active than the Childri. Much of our time was spent on the sand in Bondi, satiating the sun-lust that my siblings and I share. We went surfing, hit the zoo, wandered the city and generally bounced all over the place at a breakneck pace (which is fine because that the way I like to do things.) It was a wonderfully hectic two weeks to have both our families visit. It will surely rank amongst the best period of our time here.
Once the relations had returned home, normalcy soon moved back into our lives. After months of patiently jumping through hurdles to get certified, Jenny finally got a proper teaching job (sight unseen, via text message. Such is the desperation for Special Ed talent here in Australia.) She’s got herself a great job at a school for profoundly disabled children in Bondi. It’s her first opportunity to build her own classroom and establish her own curriculum. After a tough first couple weeks, pulling together teaching strategies on 48 hours notice, she’s really hit her stride and is beginning to rediscover the love for this work that 15 months of hellish masters classes can take away. (Humble as ever, Jenny will tell you that she’s just scrambling to keep things from imploding. I, on the other hand, can report that she’s officially the best teacher ever. Her school has already offered for her to stay if we didn’t have to leave.) As I have been between semesters, I’ve been working a lot at the travel store. If anyone needs info of domestic carry-on luggage allotments, I am your man. The combination of our two jobs and the incredible gift of scholarship money for my studies from various organizations has allowed us to finally get out of the pits of brokedom and enjoy this city properly. We can go out to dinner, go to the movies, buy replacements for our tattered clothes. Life has improved drastically of recent and we’re in position to give this city a proper run-through for the first time.
We’ve also improved our living situation. Gone is our tiny, roach-infested studio and in is a fantastic apartment in the heart of the city that we’re sharing with Max and Sophie. Sadly, the clock in our heads has begun to tick. We are t-minus three months and change from having to leave this place. The next few months will fly by as I have returned to school, Jenny’s working voraciously and every free moment is spent trying to maximize our time with this city and the friends we’ve made in it.
After the whole big speech about settling down and finding what might be the one, I know that I will have to leave Sydney some day soon. I fear that Sydney may be the one that got away. I’ve already scheduled a rebound date with my good-time girl Bali to help me get over it.

P.S. You'll notice a serious shortage of photos. During these event, my camera was long-dead. All pics used here were taken with camera belonging to my family members. As for the Childers visit and New Years? You'll just have to take my word that these things happened as there is no photographic evidence to prove it.

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Photos

Free Arressted Development concert
most common crowd quote "Hey, Where's Gob"

Uncommon view of the bridge
thanks to Jenny's uncommon route to Circular Quay

Apparently Wallabees are scary
Little does she know there's a big, deadly turkey lurking

This Goat's rent must be astronomical
look at that view

Gay Bars with my girlfriend and sister
Not a sentence I commonly typed.

Jenna enjoying her first ever alcohal
that's her story and she's sticking to it.

Representin the Zoo
Taronga What!

Snow Leopard
This one does not come with itunes included