Advertisement
Published: July 12th 2009
So........ I am writing this with a tear in my eye, as most of you now know Han and I are back in Blighty :o( Its an end of an era, no responsibilities and behaving wholly inappropriately on a daily basis. But lets not get too depressed as I need to fill you in on our last 2 weeks of the world tour ("yay!" I hear you cry!!)
Vegas, Vegas, Vegas. So after a gruelling 8 hour bus trip from SD we get to LV. The drive wasn’t particularly interesting, unless baron deserts, trailer parks and rocky hills are your thing. Again, the usual non-human, sub-society American dregs were on the Greyhound bus. One exclaiming "I didn't know the airport was right on the strip!?" What he was actually referring to was the Hotel Stratosphere Tower. Oh dear. And this nation is the most powerful in the world? Very worrying. Vegas is like a mirage that springs out from the middle of the Nevada desert, there is just miles of nothingness, then all of a sudden this sight like no other just springs up from obscurity. You have to see it to believe it. So we check into our hotel
(The Stratosphere) Which is on the far north end of The Strip. Its a little out of the way, but cheap as chips as a result (£15 a night each- cheaper than 90% of hostels outside of Asia as they expect you to lose so much money in their casinos and there's a lot of competition- 80,000 hotel rooms in Vegas!!) But after 5 months of slumming it in dorms the room was verging on palatial- 2 double queen size beds, a great view from 2nd to top floor, room service, big TV with on demand films, hanging space, a huge ensuite........ bliss! The Stratosphere is the tallest building in Vegas and on top of the tower are the 3 highest rollercoasters in the world- but anyone who knows me knows I would not set foot on one of those! I would rather chew glass.
The first day we decide to sun ourselves for the first time properly since Fiji. Vegas is baking (not surprising as it is in the middle of the Nevada desert!) but there's no humidity, it’s such a dry heat so you dont sweat, its lovely. We went to the 25 club pool, optional topless
sunbathing (illegal in California, which is weird as LA is the porn capital of the world.....) And once again men had to pay $10 for the privilege and we had to pay....... guess....... zilch! Thats correct! There were a few risqué games played in and around the pool; namely licking whipped cream and cherries off women's parts of anatomy, but Han and I as usual kept our cool English reserve and didn't partake, just got smashed on $9 Strawberry Daiquiri’s all day instead! Do any of you remember Samantha Mumba (Irish Black singer)? Well she was sunbathing right next to us. Dont you just love Z list celebrity spots!? Oh and she has substantial cellulite. Meeeeoooow. That night we went to watch one of the hotel shows "American Allstars" Which was a celebrity impersonation show, if you stay at the hotel you get half price tickets, and if you saw the show you'd understand the need for offers. We were about to demand our $20 back (I actually looked more like Britney Spears then the act) until "Michael Jackson" came out; bloody brilliant it- it was like we were watching the real thing (RIP Jacko)! Marvellous. After the show we
went to the hotel's buffet. You have never had buffet before until you have a Vegas buffet. They are off the scale. $12 buys you all you can eat buffet. On offer is virtually every dish from every cuisine under the sun. 2 tips: don't mix nationalities; separately great; together just plain weird (re: sushi avec Italian avec Mexican. Not OK). Oh and low on the carbs, else you wont get your money's worth! The food really is of an excellent standard, but we've found that across the whole of America really, and the service impeccable.
So the next day we were up bright and breezy as we had a dinner date with Joe's Aunts Jill and Lyn and uncle Pip (thanks again for treating us to lunch!) As Vegas veterans, they showed us around 2 of the most famous hotels; Bellagio, and The Venetian. If you have never been to Vegas it is impossible to describe these hotels. Their sheer size is incomprehensible and the workmanship that goes into them...... The Venetian has a full blown canal running through it with Gondolas the lot, The Bellagio has a 5 acre lake that hosts the magical fountains, New York
New York has a statue of Liberty, Empire State, Paris has the Eiffel Tower- all virtually to scale as well! Excalibur is a massive castle, The Luxor is a huge Egyptian pyramid, its unbelievable and dare I say............. slightly grotesque. There I said it! OK this is how I really feel about Vegas; if you regard yourself as sophisticated, cultured and not really a gambler...... dont fly thousands of miles to go to Vegas. If you're in the vicinity, pop along for a couple of days, but don't go out your way to visit. I'm of the school of thought where if you wanted to stay in a Venetian hotel..... go to Venice. If you want to stay at New York New York..... stay in NYC and so on and so forth.
The next day we were up at a brutal 5am for a bus trip to the Grand Canyon and Hoover Dam. We crossed the border to Arizona, and what lay before us was a 17 hour bus trip argh!! 2nd longest of the whole trip! If you have the money, take a helicopter, well worth it. A 17 hour bus trip for 10 mins at the Hoover
Dam and 2 hours at the Grand Canyon is not OK. Ok so the Hoover dam; well its a dam. Lots of concrete, water, the usual thing you'd expect........ but no, seriously it is bloody impressive and the sheer scale is awe-inspiring. Hoover Dam facts (I know you love my useless facts, dont deny it!) Completed in 1936, took 5 years to complete, 96 men died building the dam and the poor buggers had to work 363 days a year! So we leave the Hoover Dam and continue our mammoth journey to The Grand Canyon. After what seemed like a lifetime we eventually get there at 3pm. YOU CANNOT BELIEVE WHAT YOU ARE SEEING WITH YOUR OWN EYES. The Grand Canyon is the most visited natural wonder in the world, and if you've ever been you can see why. It's just breath taking, it doesn't look real, it's like you're looking at a painting or a postcard, the size of it is unreal, and the colours are just so vivid. The canyon was created by the Colorado (colour red en espagnol) River over a six million year period. The canyon is 277 miles (446 km) long, ranges in width from
4 to 18 miles (6.4 to 29 km) and attains a depth of over a mile (1.83 km) (6000 feet) and 5 million people visit it a year! 17 hours on a bus was definitely worth it. If you ever get the opportunity go see it, it won't disappoint!
Friday night was the only night we went out in Vegas. We got glammed up to the nines and headed out with our German friend Gina (aka Gina G- ooooh ah just a little bit!) Earlier in the day we had been approached by a club promoter who had given us free VIP passes to all the clubs. Once again if you are female and not horrifically ugly or overweight you get in everywhere for free. If you are male, doesnt matter what you look like, to get into a club you have to buy an expensive bottle of vodka or champagne and pay for a table. Not fair I'd admit but that the way the cookie crumbles. We go to Jet @ Mirage and Prive @ The Hardrock Cafe, get lots of drinks bought for us, party the night away....... end up back at the hotel at 4 and
end up ordering $60 of room service. Phones should ALWAYS have breathalysers on them!!
So Monday comes which signals the end of our week in Vegas. Everyone warned us a week is far too long to spend in Vegas, but to be honest we found it just right as there is so much to see and do! Oh and we gambled $1 in a slot machine and we made $1.10 so we can say we officially made money in Vegas! Vegas is all about indulging to your hearts desire. Whether that would be gambling, food, entertainment, cal girls, strippers..... whatever takes your fancy; Vegas will cater for it. Vegas represents society in its most gluttonous form, many many people I know would find the place fairly depraved and revolting, but if you are that way inclined; avoid it at all costs, Vegas is not for everyone, but if you have a spare few thousand dollars to waste and some outlandish fantasies you want to divulge in, there is no better place in the world to do so.
So back on the Greyhound and the start of one of the worst days on the trip. We get to the
Greyhound station and realise we have booked our tickets for 12am as opposed to 12pm (ooops! blonde moment) But very luckily there are spaces for us on the bus. Secondly we are informed our tickets are E-tickets only and we will not be let on the bus without them, so with 20 mins to spare I have to dash to the nearest casino, find a computer with internet, pay a ludicrous amount of money and eventually print off our tickets in the nick of time. We get on the bus and settle down. Have I informed you the bus drivers sit in bullet proof plastic cubicles? and that the driver informs you if you witness illegal activity/people taking drugs/if you are being abused not to hassle the drivers but to ring 911 immediately? Very reassuring! But this is the last trip on the Greyhound (thank god) so we relax and get on with the journey back to LA. 4 hours into the ride, the bus starts making some very peculiar noises. The gas then stops and we have to pull into some services in the middle of the Nevada Desert. We are then informed the bus has broken down and
there is a 4 HOUR WAIT for the next one. Brilliant. So we are surrounded by weirdos, in the middle of the desert with no mode of transport. Us non-American tourists huddle together for security- its so funny how we sniff each other out in times of peril! Whilst half of the bus go to the nearest offie and use the time to get more drunk then they already are. After what seems like a life time the rescue bus comes and we all pile on. We eventually get into LA at 10pm and start off loading the bus. Slight issue. 5 bags are missing. 2 of them being mine and Han's rucksacks- oh joy! Oh and the customer service at Greyhound is just marvellous. For a start none of them can barely speak English, they are mentally retarded, oh and to mention the fact they DONT GIVE A SHIT! So they had no clues where our bags were, no idea if someone was going to find out and no idea if/when we'd get them back. Yippee! So we check into a nearby hotel (with a nice Irish boy, also lost his luggage- we get a room to share and
he says he can't get over his luck! Easy tiger...) And then head down to the Greyhound station first thing. Luckily the next morning we found the one and only helpful Greyhound employee who got someone to open the end compartment of the broken down bus and remove our luggage, so we were reunited with our bags!! Yippee!!
We spend the next 2 days at a hostel by the beach in Santa Monica (still no sunbathing to be had in Cali WTF).... and on the 10th June, horrifically overhung, we fly to New York! The last time Han and I were in NYC was Aug '01 (on top of the World Trade Centre right before 9/11), so going back was going to be a bit strange for us as New York and subsequent events from 9/11 have changed the fabric of the world so much. New York is without a shadow of a doubt the most amazing city in the world. Fact. I would love to be patriotic and say London is my favourite city, but for me Manhattan has the edge. I know its a cliché, but the minute you're off the plane you immediately feel like you're
in a film set. The architecture is just so impressive. Its quite different from the rest of the US, its just so sophisticated, exciting, hip, impressive- everything you imagine from a big city and more. So the first 2 nights we are put in a horrific hostel by STA Travel the wrong side of central park on 103rd and nowhere. We go out to get some Thai food on Broadway and make a wrong turn down a street where we are accosted by some black guys, "Hey snowflake (white girl, I assume) can I suck those titties??" Nice! And my mammories weren't even hanging out for a change, it was cold! So after 2 nights we get out of there quick sharp and book into a nice, very reasonable hostel near Times Square. On Friday night we got out for a big night out in NYC, last time we were here we weren't old enough to drink, so we certainly made up for this this time round! We head to the nightclub Pacha, the meatpacking district (very hip bars and restaurants) and end up getting a lift home in a Bentley GT convertible. Only the best for the Harrild Twins!
On Sunday we had booked a Sex and The City tour, but getting to the bus was a little challenging, as the road they were supposed to pick us up on (5th Ave) HAS BEEN COMPLEELY SHUT DOWN due to Puerto Rica day! Great! So Han and I were trying to get through the thousand and thousands of semi-naked Puerto Rican carnival revellers (we didnt look out of place at all!) to this damn bus, luckily it didn't leave without us, and for the next 3 hours we were just in SATC girl bliss! There were 2 men who had been dragged along on the tour by their respective partners, and they had such a look of disgust on their faces it was hilarious! So we got to see all the major SATC landmarks- had a cosmopolitan at Aiden and Steves bar, had a cupcake from Magnolias, saw the infamous Carrie wedding steps (sorry all you men who are reading this!) It was just bloody marvellous, so good I almost peed my pants. Most of the filming was in and around Greenwich Village (AKA the West Village) and if I had the money I would move there in a
heartbeat its brilliant. The next day we went on an all day boat and bus pass round Manhattan. We had done the boat trip 8 years ago, and unfortunately to be honest its just not as impressive without the twin towers being there. Han and I went to Ground Zero and it was just harrowing. Really really upsetting and depressing. The site is still a building site, it looks like they havent done anything in the 8 years since 9/11. The 1 World Trade Center is currently under construction at the site and at 1,776 ft (541 m) upon completion in 2011, will become the one of the tallest buildings in North America, behind the Chicago Spire and the CN Tower in Toronto. So we leave Ground Zero and head up Wall Street way. All of a sudden the day changes from red hot sun, to a major clap of thunder and the heavens open. Not funny when you are on an open top double decker bus with no downstairs, raincoats, ponchos or umbrellas! When Han and I stepped off we looked like we'd just entered a wet T-shirt competition! I've never been so sodden in my entire life. We
go to China Town looking for fake designer handbags. We are approached by a Chinese woman who whispers "fake bags?" Yes please... "follow me" so we follow this lady to a well dodgy side street where 10 other Western girls are hanging around. We get shoved a lists of available fake bags by another very shifty Chinese woman, and when you place your order she disappears who knows where and re-appears with huge black bin liners, its so funny, obviously highly illegal, but $50 a pop, you can make a bloody fortune! We decide the quality was crap and head off empty handed to Little Italy for dinner.
So the 16th of June comes along and after 5 months spells the end of our adventure round the world :o( We fly BA home and it was so weird getting on the plane; hearing Classical music, listening to English accents, watching English TV..... weird but also somewhat reassuring. It never ceased to amaze me what influence our little country England has/had on the rest of the world. English is the international language and more people speak English then any other. The bloody queens head on nearly every note! And the
amount of countries with road names like 'Manchester Street' 'Pall Mall' etc. Also how well known our popular culture is; music, films, celebs, royal family- even in America too.
So all in all Han and I have had the biggest ball all around the world on this trip, I can't say we've changed fundamentally as people or 'found ourselves' but it really has been the time of our lives and opened our eyes to what the world has to offer. So in conclusion to my fabulously witty, charming and entertaining blog I am going to let you in on 50 facts I have discovered from my adventure:
1. Travelling the world is bloody easy if you stick to a well trodden route. If Han and I can do it, anyone can.
2. Guesstimate your spending budget, then double it and this is what you'll spend.
3. Dont do the route we did if you're over 30. You'll just look sad and old.
4. If you've never been before go to New York and New Zealand.
5. Swedish are by far the best looking nationality.
6. Dutch are the most fun.
7. Aussies don't like us Brits
8. Yanks
love us.
9. Cheapest country= Thailand.
10. Most expensive= Singapore.
11. Biggest surprise= New Zealand.
12. Biggest disappointment= Australia.
13. Most beautiful beach= Mission Beach, Queensland, Oz.
14. Best city= New York
15. Most fun= Fraser Island, Oz
16. Best town= Queenstown, NZ.
17. Best website for backpackers= Hostelbookers.com
18. Best food= America
19. Worst food= Singapore
20. No where does chip and pin, in the US sometimes you didnt have to sign your receipt!?
21. Never bring heavy books with you, book exchanges are everywhere.
22. Only if self drive or heading off beaten track do Lonely Planet books come in useful.
23. Most unsafe place= San Fran
24. Safest place= NZ
25. Best airline= Quantas
26. Worst= Jetstar
27. Best snorkelling= Thailand/Fiji (not Great Barrier Reef!)
28. Best nightlife= Surfers Paradise, Oz.
29. Most racially diverse place= U.S.
30. England in my opinion, is the most sophisticated country on earth (as is most of Europe).
31. Yanks and Aussies get super excited over 200 year old buildings. We have buildings 1000's of years old.
32. UK isn't so bad...... there are far worse places to live out there.
33. Yanks are obsessed with dogs. Oh and their cities
all smell of urine.
34. Wireless Internet is mostly free in Asia and US, not anywhere else, Fiji being by far the most expensive.
35. Never travel on a Greyhound bus in the US, book flights in advance.
36. Travel the Greyhound in Australia.
37. Do not do the Oz/Kiwi Experience if over 23 years of age, or have a mental age of above 23.
38. Do not start a travel blog, its a ballache to update.
39. Ideally dont go travelling with a partner at home.
40. Dont travel with a partner if it can be helped. Or twin sister named Hannah.
41. Hottest place= Cairns, Oz.
42. Coldest= San Fran.
43. Craziest experience= 10 hours in Mexico.
44. Ratio of backpackers: 70% British, 10% Scandinavian, 8% Canadian, 6% Irish, 3% Dutch, rest Germans, French, Orientals and Americans.
45. Be fairly flexible with your dates.
46. Only book air tickets through travel agencies, book all accomodation yourself.
47. Try the food! You're travelling! Don't spend your life in MacDonalds!
48. Be wary of people, but not standoffish, just keep your wits (and valuables!) about you and you'll be fine.
49. Dont take a backpack! Take a case with wheels.
50. Dont travel on a catamaran in choppy water if prone to seasickness!
Hope that helps!
Its been emotional............... I cant believe my blogs have been viewed 2627 times!!
Until our next adventure.......
Peace B and h XXXXXXXXX
Advertisement
Tot: 0.217s; Tpl: 0.017s; cc: 8; qc: 52; dbt: 0.0947s; 1; m:domysql w:travelblog (10.17.0.13); sld: 1;
; mem: 1.2mb
Clare & John
non-member comment
"What a long, strange trip it's been..."
.....and very tiring! Thanks for keeping us informed! Always highly entertaining.....congratulations on surviving all those hangovers.......you have to suffer for your art!