Killer Lakers

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Most hotels are organized quite nicely. There is a nice big circular drive with a perfect little area to turn the engine off and check-in. Continue through the loop and have your choice with an abundance of parking spots scattered all the way around the hotel in a parking lot that is never full. I like those properties. We all like those properties.

My hotel is not one of those properties.

My hotel sits on the main drag in an extremely popular beach town. Like most beach towns, parking and space is at an absolute premium. There is no room for a nice big circular driveway or parking lot encompassing the hotel. As a matter of fact, there is no room for a parking lot at all. Instead, we have a garage with 10 less spots than we have rooms, and we have a driveway the size of your bedroom.

This causes problems. A lot of freaking problems, many of which I will highlight in future blog entries. The one that sticks out the most, however, has to do with a death threat and the Los Angeles Lakers basketball team.

My coworker (let's call him Bob) was working an evening shift by himself at the front desk. All of a sudden, he sees a car (driving much too fast) screech to a stop in our driveway, right outside our front doors. Instead of picking one of the narrow lanes to stop in, the gentleman decided to park perpendicular to the lanes, thus blocking all cars from entering or leaving our garage.

He (literally) jumps out of the car and starts racing through the lobby. Before rounding the corner to the elevators, Bob gets his attention.

Bob: "Excuse me sir, you can't park there like that. Are you even a guest here?"

Guy: "Hey sorry bro, I just want to watch the end of the Lakers game! I'll be right back down, the 4th quarter just started."

...in other words, at least 30 minutes...

Bob: "Sir I can't let you stay parked there, you're blocking the driveway and the garage. It'll just take a seco..."

Guy: "Look bro! I said I'll be right back!"

Bob: "If you leave the car there, I'm calling a tow truck."

...the guy reaches across the counter and grabs Bob by the collar...

Guy: "Dude I'll f***ing KILL YOU if you TOUCH my car!"

And just like that, the guy disappeared around the corner and up the elevator, leaving Bob in a state of shock. Bob, however is a trooper. Bob wouldn't surrender. Bob pushed on!

Bob noted the license plate, searched our database, found the room, and called the room. No answer. He called again. No answer. He called again. Hung up on. He called again, and this time the guy disconnects the phone.

Eventually the guy came back down, and perhaps the most intense staring contest since "The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly" ensued. Bob won. We always win.

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