Stream of Consciousness/Duno why fonts so small?

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Coastal people never really know what the ocean sybolizes to landlocked inland people-what a great distant
dream it is, present but unseen in the deepest levels of subconsciousness, and when they arrive at the ocean
and the conscious images are compared with the subconscious dream there is a sense of defeat at having
come so far to be so stopped by a mystery that can never be fathomed.
-Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance

I agree with how Bernadette and Caroline call this bloging I do a Stream of Consciousness maybe thats what
Ill call the book if there ever is one. There are many things that happen here that cannot be expressed
through writing or words and when people ask me what happened here like Ive stated before I may not even
bother to say anything more than 3 words "read my blog". Even though this is an amazing place some of the
sadness and poorness is starting to get to me in the most peculiar way. Even though alot of people here
are starving and homeless they can still fork up a smile. Are they really happy? John and I got into a
philosophical debate in a way where people literally have no other views than what their taught and its just
a matter of where one was raised in the world which forces their views upon them. But what if what everyone told
you was a lie? would you believe it because everyone told you? Makes me head spin and the questions tend
to build off of each other leading me deeper into the rabit hole which sometimes effects my sleep. I guess
its a part of culture shock like I learned today. Some days I am extremely tired and nap during the day like
Jeff stated after 8 hours of sleep and some nights I just lay there staring up at the ceiling. At this point
in my life I have no profession, have no girl friend, and have an odd lust for music. I will call it a sort
of lateral drift. Like instead of an arrow flying through the sky and comming down , it goes up and expands
in width and keeps expanding no destination yet made in stone or within reach. Searching for purpose like Ive been doing all these years and watching other peoples success brings a odd satisfaction knowing that they are probably lying to themselves and force themselves to enjoy what they probably secretly despise. expecially at my age or even probably until im around age 30 will I figure out maybe half of what Im trying to accomplish but I fear that it comes much later in life. No idea where this blogs going...thoughts are scattered

What has happened in the past few days is there anything worth trying to mention? I recall comming home after
playing vast amounts of starcraft after school to being greeting by Luis one day and Jose Luis is cousin the
next. Jose LUis is more company to me considering he probably isnt trying to get with danielle in the time
that Im probably messing it up and actually has advice for me. Couple of stories to note-I recall seeing
a baby at the fiesta de Urcupina fall on his face and normally would just start crying furiously but instead
just shook it off. NOW THATS A BOLIVIAN BABY! I thought and others who had witnessed agreed with me. ALso
at Kens party I recall sparring with the Korean pablo. We put our backside of our right feet together along
with our right hands and within seconds thought my arm was going to break and my head was rammed into the
wall. HAHA wonder what I was thinking but was fairly drunk and no longer challanged the Korean. Apparently
their familiar with pressure points too that Im not too fond of. I recall monday it being a holiday for
bolivians but We had school at 8am bummer and I actually for a while had forgotten how hard it is to wake up
that early. Bernedatte that day was the first one I talked to in english that day meeting her by the water
cups she said that everyone, Caroline, KEN, KEVIN, and whatnot tried to get a hold of me but couldnt call my
phone. THey all went on the walk from cochabamba to QUicollo as a part of the festival and from what Ive
heard there was a good amount of people ranging in the hundreds possibly thousands. From what Bern was telling
me they walked a great distance and followed some little kid up to the mountain top that overlooked the city?
Wish I was there for this view...Apparently from what she said they all gathered around some old shaman lady
who made them inhale some sort of smoke (wish i was there) and then like sprayed beer all over them as some
sort of ritual took place with chants and singing. Man I missed out...I recall even after class on monday
being so exhuasted I must have slept for a good 2 hours before heading back to school to play some craft with
John. WEll today woke up and had myself some Eggs and pan for breakfast not sure what to make of the day
went to school and arrived at about 10am way too early considering class was at 1140am. Played some starcraft
and argued with some woman who posted something saying Im sexest on my facebook wall? Um...ok haha sure.
I know ones crazy thats for sure but the other lives in texas now SHE DOESNT KNOW ME! DUnno why good friends
move to Texas lost 3 friends there...Got to the school and played some craft as john made an entrance. He
said he was at the girl school? NOt worth waking up early to go help some girl how to draw if you ask me
Id rather try and help build some houses for the homeless or something and actually make a difference and I
think im going to look into something like that tommorow. I also have to show the interpol how much money
I have in my account or something and needed my bank statement as proof so texted my paps and he tripped out
a little when I asked him for the password and username to our online statement. Im in a habit of eating a
mass amount of candies that are in the office on a daily basis. Im pretty sure this trip has increased my
overall salt and sugar intake along with alcoholic beverages as I had a few today which could be the result
of my vague blog post. AFter class I actually only after reading carolines post on my wall about something
about being crazy and wondering if I was going to go to the meeting decided to go to this meeting that I
thought John might be interested in but he was fairly tired all day considering he woke up and went to the
girl orphanage and he wanted to kill zerg more so I made my way upstairs and was greeted by Brooke, Caroline,
Bernedatte, and many others like Larry and JEff. Tom Brookes wife came in a little later. This topic of the
meeting we were going to have was about CULTURE SHOCK. THe presentation left my mind spinning and put me into
a philosphical debate with myself. Jeff and I pulled out the snacks of chips and pop corn, and odd drink of
corn. There were also some cheese and crackers and we all endulged without question. I asked John if he wanted
some who was in the student center but he was in the middle of a starcraft game. I asked him if we were still
going out to find some Mexican food and he agreed so I called my mom and told her what our plan was. John
and I were off first to Johns house to get his visa so he could get money out and Marta (his mom) told us
not to drink alcohol haha. HE actually got banned from drinking at his house or something after that one
day prepartying and going to solo mias last wednesday cant recall exactly. Pretty sure its wednesday.
WEll we were off and caught the 3v which packed up quickly. I notice people looking at me considering I might
be looking like a monkey with the beard I got going. Well we came to find after squeezing our way out of the
bus that the restaurant was closed. "What now? SOLO MIAS?" we couldnt decide and kept walking and came across
this place called DUMBOS. WOw comming to realize the only thing I ate was some Nachos that JOhn and I split.
We had some beers I had 2 Huaris and john had 2 Pacena and we each got a 3 american dollar shake mine with
Ron and Johns with wiskey. Dumbos is an amazing place lit up like stores youll never find in the states.
Even the quality of the shakes and everything was just something uncomparable to anything youll find in
California and a moment irreplaceable.



If you should go skating
on the thin ice Of modern life
Dragging behind you the silent reproach
of a million tear stained eyes
Dont be suprised when a crack in the ice
Appears beneath your feet
you go out of your depth and out of your mind
with your fear flowing out behind you
as you claw the thin ice
-Thin ice ---the wall(beats darkside of the moon if you ask me)
PINK FLOYD



4 facts of life
life is hard, you are not important, you do not have control, your going to die
-thanks jeff 4 your brilliant negativity

crazyness is normal, normal no longer has any standards

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