Why did I do this

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So today we leave for Australia, I moped for the evening yesterday once I got back to Auckland. messaged all night confused as whether I shou go back. I was torn I want to travel I didn't come here for a relationship but now I want to be with this person. We spoke for ages in the end I decided to carry on. So we left early morning and waited for the plane I was already regretting the decision and by the time I was on the plane I wish I could have just gotten off.
We landed in Adelaide where I have family so my uncle came to pick us up from the airport and dropped us back so it's really nice to see them. Due to Laura having to go back we have now cancelled sydney for Christmas so it's a bit up in the air where I will be.
I'm still miserable it hasn't even sunk in that I'm in Oz. We went through the botanic gardens where they have a national wine centre... This can only end one way... It did... We got drunk... Made a great impression on the family.

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