Bonny Wee Scotland

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Well it has been a long time between drinks/trips but finally last week i got to put my backpack on again. And it felt goooood. No London for a week, only the bold and wild scottish landscape. Oh and a few fellow travellers. 10 aussies, 2 south koreans, 1 chinese and 1 token New Zealander to be exact. Poor lassie, she copped it. Oh and 2 scots tour guides, Jamie and Fiona.
So, on Saturday morning i set off with a spring in my step to meet Davina at the train station. However we had decided to take the bus up to Glasgow to save some cash and it was a 9 hour trip. Needless to say when i got off my step wasn't so springy anymore! On the way we got a first hand example of the passionate nature of scots, when much to our surprise 3 blokes walked past and spat on the window next to us! We then noticed that the window was a Celtics shop window, and they were fans of the opposition team in scotland the Rangers. Celtics being mostly catholic and the Rangers being mostly protestant. This we found out later...Not making much sense to us at the time we moseyed along to our hostel.
The next day we went and had a look at Pollok estate, a nice country Manor where by far the most exciting bit was finding genuine highland hairy coos! (cows said in a scottish way) Cute wee beasties. Well not so wee when you get up close, although the baby one was sooo cute!
On Tuesday we started our tour with Wild in Scotland tours, which i chose because they seemed a bit more relaxed and less touristy than say a Haggis tour. Tours over here are BIG business! It was a smallish tour with not that many people on it, and we had to cook for ourselves at night and make our own breakfast but that was part of the fun. Had some interesting meals thats for sure!
The first stop of the trip was Stirling. On the way we went to St Andrews, home of Golf and the famous University. Sad that I only know of it because Prince William went there... Also had the best fish (haddock) and chips ever. The streets were teaming with (rich and mostly british) students. Jamie and Fiona were quite derogatory about them although they claimed that they have nothing against english people just the british, so i guess just the establishment and the fact that they are still not a free country. Its a bit confusing... In Stirling we saw Stirling Castle, (not the inside unfortunately) and went to an irish pub... not a very authentic scottish experience but fun nonetheless.
After Stirling we moved on to Roslyn Chapel, made famous by the Da Vinci Code. The Chapel was really cool (do not see the movie, especially in french) all sorts of carvings and lots of pagan symbolism which was interesting to find in a church.
We then made another stop in this glen, which had celtic carvings in the rock hundreds of years old. Fascinating to think that hundreds of years ago women would come down to the glen and hang stuff from the trees the day before their wedding for good luck and that they still do it to this day. We also visited the castle featured in Monty Python (Doune Castle), clip clopping all the way....most entertaining.
The next day we went on a wee boat ride over the only lake in Scotland, The Lake of Menteith. Apparently it's named after the guy who betrayed William Wallace, thus rendering himself very unpopular among the scottish and so the english name for a loch was given. (or so the story goes from Jamie, i think he embellished history a bit to make it more interesting... but i didnt really mind what he was saying, just listening to that accent was enough!) We went to Inchmahome Priory where a 5 year old Mary Queen of Scots was hidden. Such beautiful scenery here, it was gorgeous.
We then drove to a place where we were told we had a bit of a walk. Mmm well a bit of a walk turned into a huge one but we were rewarded at the top with fantastic views and a slug of Glenmorangie whisky! Slainte varr! Which means cheers, and became our new favourite saying. Saw the gravesite of Rob Roy MacGregor and then arrived at our accomodation for the evening, a castle! albeit a renovated one but was still really cool.
Thursday the weather was very scottish when we visited Loch Lomond. It features in that very famous scottish song which i was actually singing in the lead up to my trip:

You take the high road and il take the low road
And il be in Scotland afore ye,
Me and my true love will never meet again,
on the bonny bonny banks of Loch Lomond.

I always thought it was a sort of happy song, but its actually rather tragic. Its about two brothers who had been given a choice by their english captors, they could choose which one of them must die. The younger of the two put his hand up because although he had a girlfriend back home, his older brother had a wife and young family. Very poignant, when sung in a sad and mournful way. Throughout the trip Fiona played us Scottish music and told stories about brunies (fairies), battles, massacres and all manner of things. It was awesome.
Next on the agenda was a very special place, Dun Add Fort. The birthplace of the Scottish nation. Legend has it that the first Scottish King was Kenneth McAlpine (yes im almost certain i have royal blood flowing through my veins) and that he became king by bringing the Picts, the Celts and the Scotti together under one ruler. And that is where the name Scotland comes from! Now all this happened around 850AD so you can appreciate that its all a bit of a mystery really but tradition usually has some grain of truth. About the site there is a faded carving of a boar, and a small shallow footprint carved out of rock. Legend has it that this place was used during inauguration ceremonies of kingship in pagan times and the King used to put his foot in this carving during the ceremony. So with my loyal subjects before me (we role played a little with the rest of the group laughing their heads off while i royally descended down the hill) I put my foot in the carving. And guess what? a perfect fit! Continuing on our prehistory bit we went and saw some standing stones. And no mum they didnt scream at me and im still here! but was pretty cool. That night we continued on to Oban, where yet again i found a quasi famous b/c grade Australian celebrity. Robert 'Millsy' Mills of australian idol fame, or shagging (supposedly) Paris Hilton fame. Apparently she is rubbish in the sack. So went accross the road to another irish pub and sand karaoke with Fiona and Millsy! He's better at karoke than at singing on idol..... Fell down the stairs the next morning, pack and all ending up at the bottom of the stairs like a turtle not being able to get up! some testament to the late night we had but had an awesome bruise to show for it.
Next it was on to Dunstaffnage Castle, Fiona making a special detour just for me as these were traditionally thought of as McAlpine lands. Its hard to really know the history of the McAlpine clan, as it was so long ago. It is said that the McAlpine clan is the oldest and most celtic in the highlands. Derivitives of the name (mac meaning son of and Alpin/Alpein) include McAlpin (me!), MacAlpin, Alpin and various others. The McAlpine war cry was "Cunich bas Alpan" which translates to "Remember the death of Alpan". The McAlpine motto is "E'en do baite" which translates to "Spare not". A bit harsh! It is said that Kenneth McAlpin may have obtained power by force! However, Dunstaffnage was a magical place again, i could almost feel the ghosts of my ancestors in the mist and cloud.

Glencoe was next, sight of the Glencoe massacre where to put a long story short english soldiers massacred a couple of hundred people who had clothed them, fed them and sheltered them for two weeks. Bastards.
Another day another castle this one featured in some James Bond or rather... Then saw another castle this one a dangerous falling apart one, and visited a brunie place where everyone fell on their bums on the way back down. Damn those brunies!!
The next significant place was Culloden Moor. Site of the end of the 1745 Jacobite uprising. Huge massacre and was basically the begginning of the end of the clan system and the scottish way of life. After winning that battle so convincingly and slaughtering so many scots, the english set out into the highlands and raped and pillaged and caused a great famine and lots of people died from that. Then the english gave a heap of land away to people who had done well in the war. So no people + no land=no clans. A significant spot indeed. Very moving and sad.
And how could i miss Loch Ness! Didnt spot anything unfortunately but i reckon she's in there somewhere. Did see a bunch of idiots on a Haggis tour doing the Loch Ness Haka. 'Come to me, come to me, Nessie Nessie.' They looked really stupid. Would've been funny if there were a couple of huge maoris on the tour.....
So if you are still reading by this stage congratulations, this has turned into a HUGE entry! I had an absolutely awesome time in Scotland, next on the agenda is the International Rules in Dublin so stay tuned.

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