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November 4th 2012
Published: November 5th 2012
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Volubilis viewVolubilis viewVolubilis view

Entrance to the ancient ruins of Roman Volubilis. Capital of Roman Morocco
I am feeling alternately elated and unsure. Am I crazy (please do not chorus YES!!)? Who am I fooling, this is the most ridiculous idea ever segues seamlessly into wow aren't I fantastic going on this big adventure and living large...

The truth is that like almost all my decisions this was spur of the moment, reactionary, badly thought through etc etc etc but as I am too proud to admit error I chug along putting out the fires I started myself. And so i am commited to this trip by dint of my big mouth...Secret tip about big mouths...They act as goal setters...

6 more days to blast off and not only Houston is having a problem...How can I possibly get everything done...short answer: I won't. Can I live with that? Short answer: What's the alternative?

If I appear strong, insouciant, capable it is not completely untrue but a large part of it is...

I am already missing my family, my friends, my work and my familiar routine and I have not even left yet...

On that note I want to say something that might seem maudlin but that is important to me, thank you to everyone who has loved, supported and shored me up in the past months. You know who you are and it has meant a tremendous amount to me. To say that it healed and comforted is not going to far. The conversations, insights and sharing have made me a better person and with these new kernels in place I set forth to grow up and become a functioning adult. I know it is no excuse but I never realised how easy it was trust others and open up to them, I promise not to forget.

That's it for today..just a short note to mark my emotional state so that I am better able to keep track in the future...

xxx

r

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