Minsk - Round One

---

So, the bus ride was pretty uneventful, and for once, there was an English-speaking attendant, so I didn't have the usual awkward sign-language crap when trying to decipher what was being said to me. The scenery was beautiful; striking green fields as far the eye could see, broken up by the odd little town or village.

Border control was pretty strict but disorganised, and other than the fact that I wasn't sweating like a whore in church, I could've sworn I was back in Asia. There was a lot of waiting around with my heavy-arse backpack on (not that I'm complaining - I'm glad to have it back!), and even though I could've put it down, leaving it on was better than lifting it every time we moved a few steps.

Note: anyone planning to visit Minsk should make sure they have travel insurance, as you will be asked to present a your documents at the border. I'm not sure what happens if you don't have it, mind.

When I arrived in Minsk, I opted for a taxi rather than the metro, since it was after 9pm and I didn't want to end up lost. I waited around outside the bus terminal for a while, before asking a kindly old woman where I can find a taxi rank. She sent me walking up the road, where I was eventually approached by a man offering taxi services. Remembering the phrase Mariya told me for "Do you speak English?" I asked him "Pan gliski?" and he laughed at me. After much confusion and discussion with other taxi drivers, we hopped in his taxi and off we went.

After about fifteen minutes, he stopped and climbed out to ask directions. While he was gone, I called the hostel, who subsequently gave him directions upon his return. He did a U-turn and headed down a little road next to the lake. We got out and he made like he was going to help me find the exact door. Suddenly, he said "money!", quite abruptly, and before I could say "No, show me where I'm going", he snatched the €10 from my hand and got back in the car, leaving me standing there. I sighed and started looking for the correct building. Unfortunately, the door numbers do not run consecutively, so I asked a few passers-by, who seemed unwilling to help. I started feeling very frustrated and called the hostel again. The only details they offered were the door sign and that the building has a red roof. It was dark, but from what I could tell, most buildings had red roofs. Eventually, I wandered down a few alleys and side streets until I found the place.

I went in and waited while the guy struggled to find my reservation. He took me to the dorm room that led off the kitchen, and I gave a friendly "hi!" to the other guests playing cards at the table. Their response was to mimic what I'd said ten times over, then fall about laughing. The room was a mess with other peoples' clothes and the wifi wasn't working. I went back out into the kitchen and asked the group where the bathroom is. They pointed me in the right direction and laughed at me again. By this point, I was feeling rather fragile and tired, and just wanted to sit and cry out of sheer loneliness. Back in my room, I made my top-bunk bed with the sheets I had been given, and set back out to find a shop and buy some water.

I called cousin Nicki, wanting to hear a familiar voice, which cost me nearly £17 (wasn't expecting that!) and walked alongside the lake for a bit. It helped, and I went back feeling a bit more optimistic. The arseholes had gone to their room, so I got myself ready for bed, and luckily, the wifi was working fine, so I messages Mariya to say I'd be heading to her a day earlier than planned. Then, around 1am, I fell asleep, and was only briefly woken up when my room mates came back in the early hours.

In the morning, the guy at reception called to reserve my train ticket to Vitebsk, and then I waited around until one of the three showers were free. After lounging around for a while and calling Mariya to confirm my plans, I set out for lunch. Pizza again.

I took a taxi to the train station, and stood in line for about an hour waiting to buy my ticket, all the while wondering just how much of a problem the language barrier would be. See, I sort of know the Cyrillic alphabet and could figure out Minsk (Минск) and Vitebsk (Витебск) on the boards, as well as a few other destinations, but explaining that I have a reservation might not be so simple.

I was right. Long story short: I ended up on a later train than had been reserved, and had to wait until 6:48pm to catch it. By the time I'd finished actually buying the ticket, it was only about 2pm. So, I found a quiet corner, plonked myself on the floor, and got down to some serious reading. The clerk made some hand gestures as she handed me my ticket, and I walked away thinking I'm on a sleeper train. On a top bunk, on a sleeper train, no less.

As the time started to draw near, I went in search of the bathroom. Squats. And there I was thinking I'd left them behind in Asia. Then I grabbed a flat pasty-type thing which I assumed would contain meat (given that every other item clearly did) and pulled it apart to find a meat patty type thing inside. I decided "sod it" and ate it anyway. It wasn't great, but it filled a hole.

Eventually seeing the platform number on the board, and confirming it twice with two different people (since it was showing from Brest to St Petersburg, I wanted to be absolutely sure), I made my way to platform 3. Difficult part over? Errr....no.

Finally boarding the correct carriage, my earlier assumption of being on a top bunk of a sleeper train was confirmed. Once again, I was baffled by the way in which the numbers were set out, although I'm sure they do make some sort of sense. Just not to me. Half the carriage (mostly kind-hearted elderly folk) helped me find my bunk, which was a pain in the arse because I don't know how to say '40' in Russian and the train attendant took my ticket. I do, however, know how to say 'thank you' (спасибо - spasibo) and used it profusely. Anyway, we found number 40, and then I had to stash my backpack under the bottom bed (disturbing the sleeping woman on it) before clambering up to my bunk. Another difficult task, due to the positioning of the step ladder. I have to stay laying down, because sitting up would entail hunching over beneath the overhead storage rack. And now I'm up here, I need to pee. Dammit!

My next holiday needs to be a five star all-inclusive resort with English-speaking staff and an air-conditioned coach taking me wherever I need to go. Just kidding - we all know I ain't about that life! Although, I really could do with some luxury and pampering after all this.

Oh well, I certainly provided my fellow passengers with their evening entertainment, and I'm sure they'll get a second dose when I make my way back down for the bathroom. Fun times!

---