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Published: April 23rd 2009
It is 2 in the morning and I can't get back to sleep, so here I am, writing. My last entry, I was quite obviously freaked out about everything that has been going on here. I think it was a combination of everything really. All of the bad things just seemed to be piling up and weighing in my mind. But, the last week has been much better.
I am really looking forward to next week! We have a three day weekend because of Labour Day and I picked the spot we are going to. I chose Sambo Creek, a Garifuna Village just outside of La Cebia. They have Caribbean food, hot springs and the Ocean. Not to mention the part that I am totally excited about, the zip line. I cannot wait to be hanging from a cord flying through the trees, it's going to be awesome.
This weekend, most of us have decided that we aren't going to be drinking. Last weekend, that was all we did it seemed. Although quite fun, the weekend seems to just fly by that way. I would like to have a weekend that I can lounge and just enjoy fully. Today though, I was trying to think of things that we could do in Comayagua that didn't involve alcohol and I managed to come up with one thing. Katie and I are going to have a barbecue on Saturday night. Okay, so it doesn't actually count as not drinking, since we will more than likely be doing exactly that. But, it should count for something if we aren't at the bar.
Our house has become a sorority house. There are always people here, usually partying, if it is the weekend and sometimes if it's not. There has been a lone beer bottle on our front lawn for over a month that nobody has picked up. Both Katie and I know it's there, but for some reason it just jasn't made it's way to the garbage. That just added to the effect this past weekend. We had quite a few visitors this weekend. Laina is a German girl here volunteering for four months and Cendrick is a base girl we also met. It is hard to explain, but somehow it ends up being that I made everyone clap for her (it was actually for Katie, who was behind her) as she was leaving the bar. She thought we were crazy, of course, so I decided that she needed to come to another bar with us. So she ended up hanging out with us for the weekend. Also, there was some guy that Katie met and he came over on Sunday to bring fruit. It was strange and we have all decided that he is probably married. So we now refer to him as the mango, banana, married guy. Now to the part where the the beer bottle ornament starts looking like our mascot. A guy that was over here after the bar, ended up puking exactly right in front of our door. Not outside, no. Right in front of the door on the inside. I am sure just opening the door seemed too difficult at the time and so he puked right here. I was the first one to wake up and so I got to see that first thing in the morning. Surprisingly, I was able to clean it without getting ill. Maybe, I am getting a little too used to this whole sorority house thing, just maybe. I think we need a name.
We found out today that we have another new roommate. Again, nobody told us. They brought in another French Teacher. This time should be much different. She is Honduran, form Tegus and so I am guessing she will be here until the end of the year. It bothered both Katie and I that she was the one to tell us that she was coming to stay with us. The school didn't tell us anything, not even that there was a new French Teacher, not surprising. I am sure she will be great, but things here at the houses are perfect the way they are. Now we will have another new person, but only form Monday to Wednesday and then she goes back to Tegus. It's just a strange arrangement. Things are perfect at the houses, a nice mix and we all have our routines pretty much set. Of course we will make room for her, it is just weird ot be the house that has to take in every new person, for them just to leave. I think I am developing those same abandonment issues that I made fun of earlier this year. I have become one of them!
Now, the question that is on everyone's mind...will she stay or go? I feel as though I have come to a decision that I am happy with and one that I can definitely live with. I want to stay. There are of course a ton of reasons why I feel I should stay. I desperately want to improve my Spanish and I know that I can do that here. Also, I really feel like I am supposed to be here another year. I am not saying or even thinking that it will be easy and there may be days when I will think that I should've gone somewhere else, but I think those days will be few and far between. I am comfortable here, I love my students and would love to see them progress next year. When I hear people talking about next year, I get excited. I started part way through the year and I would really love to have a class for the whole year. Teaching has it's ups and downs, especially in a country as poor as this. there are days when I can't find what I need, but I have learned to be very, very resourceful and make stuff out of nothing. There are so many experiences that I have had here that have changed me as a person. I want to have many more of those and that is just one of the reasons that I have decided to stay.
I know that my last entry I seemed set on leaving, due to all of the issues around here. I was absolutely positive that I had to leave and move on with my life. It wasn't until I was set on leaving, that I started to feel really quite sad. My walks home, I would think about how much I would miss this place when I left. This place may not be the safest place, but what place is. Comayagua has managed to hold a piece of my heart and I am just not ready to leave.
The saddest part for me will be saying goodbye to my friends when they leave. I don't like the feeling of being left behind and that's already how I am feeling. These people have become a huge part of my life. We are together all of the time, laughing, joking, lounging, drinking and of course talking. We have become like a close knit family and I will be very, very sad when they leave. There are a couple people staying, which is great. But all of the people that I hang out with everyday, are the ones leaving. Katie is going back to school, Annie is talking about Europe, Leighanne is still thinking and Charles just wants out. So, that is my whole group of friends. I love the other teachers, we just don;t hang out that much. Morgan is married and so obviously, doesn't go out as much, although I wish she did because she is awesome. And the girls, Sadaf and Barahe rarely ever go out. Then there is Ryan and Brenda, but they are married and so again, same thing. I am sure the people next year will be great, or at least I hope. I just know I am going to miss the friends that I have come to know here.
So, no matter what next year holds, I think I am ready. I will be going home for sure this summer and then coming back to Comayagua in August to start the new school year. Now, I may go back in forth in my head a few more times because that's just the kind of person that I am. But, I know that in the end, I will come to the same decision. I did get a job offer in Bali, but that won't allow me the opportunity to work on my Spanish. So, Bali can wait until the next year. That's right, I am thinking that far ahead. I am staying here in Comayagua for another school year. That is my final answer haha.
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swills82
Sarah Willett
See ya then!
Congrats on a decision. I know it's tough. It's hard to explain to anyone how a place that is not your own country can feel so much like home. This is how I feel each time I visit Honduras. I realized it the most significantly after I spent 2 weeks backpacking by myself through Guat. When I crossed the border back into Hondo, I felt a huge relief. I then cried in the taxi on the way back to the houses. I was home. I suppose this means I'll actually get to meet you, assuming Walt and I get away from Tegus some weekends and make it out to Sangrias or Villa Real. See ya then!