what are you going to do about it? So you think it's a fantasy? Have you seen the cars that some African people drive? It is not only a white problem- it is a rich problem! Teach them to fend for themselves and although the world might think English is the way - what is their mother tongue and why can't they learn that? I dreamt of going to STellenbosch University but did not get that dream - my parents and my waitressing could not afford it!! I made a new and eventually better plan- at Home in Rural Zululand! Now here in Cape Town I'm teaching in my mother tongue children who don't speak it!?? Wake up and don't blame the past look to the future and what are you going to do about it? Drink more coffee because if you worked hard for your money then you deserve to drink the coffee without a guilty conscience. Birth control and going back to your cultural home is far better than living in squalor in a shack- if all else failed you'd go back home before living in cardboard!
Utter bullshit I live in Johannesburg not Stellenbosch, but I strongly disagree with this article. Just because you were there from your disgustingly priveledged background doesnt not mean you can smear all white people, especially those of a country you are not even a resident of, in the same colour. Every day I experience black against white racism. I have been unemployed for 7 fucking years. Every news headline is an attack on my people and my culture. While ignorant fly by night martyrs like you want to tell everyone how we must give more to blacks, poor whites like me with nothing are ever more burdened with your misplaced guilt. And truly undeserving lazy blacks rise ever higher and richer in all facets of society.
I think it's always easy to be idealistic when you are young, a student with limited responsibility. I guess seeing that you are studying you are aspiring to have some career, make some money and join the billions of consumers of the world.
The majority of people, white and black are struggling hard to make a living and provide for their families. Those who do better will provide better opportunities for their children (I guess as a foreign exchange student you have been given some of these opportunities as well).
How did you determine that some of those people in their BMWs are not philanthropists themselves helping where they can.
Finally Stellenbosch is a fantastic place with a fantastic diverse culture, I think it's great that you help out in the townships but I don't really believe this blog is of any use other than to ease your own conscience.
you're a nut babe, it scared the hell out of me when you told me about this experience over the phone back when i was in aplahoue. the next time you try to do something insane like that, YOU'D BETTER TAKE ME WITH YOU!
Really good Interesting. Sorry for adding to an 'old' article but as a Brit who was comtemplating coming to study here I wondered if it were a 'multiracial' environment clearly ready by what you've said, it's not. However, I would still like to come as I'm interested in the W. Cape. Cheers!
You're a trooper! Ok. I thought for sure i had already left a comment....hmmm. Try this again:
First of all your determination never ceases to amaze me. Secondly, your words and the way you capture your experience really makes me feel like i was right there with you!
Awesome.
sarah hailey, you're F-ing crazy!!!!!! i love this blog b/c it pretty much describes the table mountain experience for me (although i know, i know, that was baby food for you). but yes, sistah, i feel the fear. and i am proud to say that your blog made me once again appreciate, for the 100th time, that i'm in my comfortable chair on my laptop in my air-conditioned apartment....and not on the top of a mountain.
glad you found people to share your mountain-climbing adventures with!! LOVE YOU!!
wowsers i had no idea that you were in montana! what are you doing and for how long? glad you survived the trip up the mountain and back. have you heard from our friend in africa?
lis
so glad I stumbled upon your blog! Hey Sarah E. Hailey~ I'm so glad that I stumbled upon your blog at this relatively late hour! I can't wait to hear stories upon your return to M-vulle for J-term!! Take care of yourself. Peace- Em
hi hi. I live in Stellenbosch, too, I'm 19 years old and attend the local university. I hate to ruin your fantasies even more, but Stellenbosch sucks more than you know. I even feel sorry for you because I get the feeling you mingle with the "upper classes" of Stellenbosch ( the brainless little fashion victims who drink all their parents' money away at Mystic Boer and Bohemia while the country is starving with poor people, crime etc. ) Here is the deal: Few people give a damn about anyone but themselves in that town. Take away your cool clothes and your money and see if anyone is going to love you. Criminals run amock in that town. There have been 3 attempts at my life and I have done nothing wrong. The "white guilt" picture you have painted is beautiful and moral and all, but the country is dying and black people kill each other more often than they kill white people. It is easy to sit in the seats of the rich and condemn white people and past generations for all they have done but the truth is this: The Government Here Sucks. Ok? It is not my fault that people are still poor. The government promised its people free HOUSES AND A GOOD NON-CORRUPT LEGAL SYSTEM TEN YEARS AGO. The government won't even use the death penalty to protect the innocent little children IN TOWNSHIPS who are being raped at age 2 or whatever. WAKE UP. REALITY is a sick thing in this country. I suggest you enjoy what you have and stop feeling bad about your ruined fantasy right away, because you are in a fortunate position. And don't blame us whites when some criminal saws your head off. I've heard lots of black people say the country was better under Apartheid. Cuz, back then people were poor, but now they are not only still poor, they are being chopped up. Like I said, your fantasy will be doubly ruined if you realise that black and white in this country is on a filthy stinking quest for power, sex and destruction.
white american I am overwhelmed and grateful for this response, and I don't know if you'll read this, but I would like to give an account for my words. Injustice is everywhere, and my experience in Stellenbosch is just one place that I have encountered it. Could I think for one second that the entire American Dream, the food we eat, the petrol we fill our huge cars with, the land we live on, our consumerist lifestyles, and even most of our religion is all an appaling lie. This is my burden to bear and the struggle that I am responsible for as an American. I do recognize that my situation is a variation of the South African legacy. My ancestors murdered the native people of our land. We enslaved Africans. We upheld segregation until the 1960s. Today we discriminate against latinos and Mexicans and we expliot their labor, barring them from basic human dignity. The United States has been engaged in military endeavors every single day since Pearl Harbor and we now are responsible for the sensless death now taking place in Iraq. All these are not just mere facts, they are burdens that I bear responsibility for as a citizen of the United States.
The point of my record of South Africa is not to downplay any other injustice going on in the world, but simply to name the injustice I was confronted with there. I never claimed that my account was the full picture, because that simply is not possible. As I said in the blog, I put off writing it for so long because I recognized that my perspective as a foriegn exchange student was limited. But still it was something, and my conscience wouldn't let me sit in silence--posting only blogs of cute animals and smiling friends.
Some of the most amazing people I met were White South Africans, but that doesn't wipe out the privildge and selfish ignorance that was also a large part of my experience there.
As for your identity as a White African, I did have that talk with a friend of mine there. As the inheritance of colonization, we all who care about the present reprecussions of the past must struggle with how to turn guilt into positive change for our society. You are not alone on that, and just as I am an American, so you are an African. It is a part of our identity that must not be denied.
That's it. This world that we find ourselves in today is often an overwhelming web of injustice, and sometimes I get exhausted and hopeless struggling to free even myself from it. But I am learning to do what I must. The bottom line is that back home, nobody would ever know about these injustices if I didn't publish them, and I do have a responsibility to speak this truth.
And I thank you for doing the same.
Feel free to email me further at sarahehailey@hotmail.com
"Humane" Sarah~ reading about your eye-opening experience makes me once again question the existence of these injustices in the world. The contradiction of these and the assumed living god of love surge a deep anger and hatred in me as I fail even now without that veil...to understand and accept what I am so powerless over. All I can say is that I love you. I love your compassion for those who have to see the world through the lens of harsh reality. I love your ability to reach out and try to understand on the only level you are capable of. Your strength and your courage I can honestly say motivate me, but I fear that I do not have the strength to witness such dwindling hope without it destroying me in the end. You are so closeyou touch the sweet life that has found comfort in love yet existence in pain, and still you manage to uphold some sanity. I admire you because I know in so many ways it is destroying any hope you may have for humanity, any hope in finding an answer or even coming to a conclusion.
I sit here and read, and what I feel on this end, thousands of miles away from this immediate reality, I know you feel consume every part of who you are. Yet what I feel doesn’t even come close to what Zama has to live with for the rest of her life. We are devastated to meet the death of a single family member at this age and yet she watches as those who mean the world to her pass on every few years.
It destroys me to know that mankind has the ability to turn a blind eye.
“Human” should ever have been placed in “Humane.”
excruciating poetry Sarah, I admire how you express yourself, though the stories you tell are often heart breaking. I can not imagine the affect they have on you as you live and breath the stories. I encourage you to continue to find ways to share your experiences with others. I look forward to seeing you and hope your time in Ghana is a wonderful homecoming.
Serious thoughts Think you need to slow down on the coffee. Actually, I was moved by this last round of contemplations and sensations. I have been educated, entertained and enlightened by your blog. See you when you get back to Murvil.
freedom yes and amen. it sucks when i am let down by the fantasy that i bought into my whole life. and i am surrounded by its injustices daily when i pick up a dang history book. like who do we think we are? i guess that all depends on who we think they are... i love you sarey.
Sarah~~ Your words are so powerful and your heart is so strong. We spend our lives fighting the battles people call hopeless and in many senses we refuse to define hopelessness for ourselves. Our strength is in our love, it is in our cautious and ever watching eyes and in the attempt to expose reality and injustice for what it is in hopes to find some truth. As I have watched you grow and become so much more wise and understanding, it makes it that much more painful for me to not be there to experience this with you. I think we have learned through this past year in each other’s physical absence that we are strong on our own but also that the increasing love, compassion, and understanding of a true friend often makes many of the battles worth fighting. You have been this for me and I thank you now just get back here (and please no little surprise packages)!
Wow! Sarie- I just wanted to thank you for your words of truth. Your expression of the fairy tale is incredibly moving. You have a way with words that helps the mental picture of life. I respect the fact that you are there and that you see that truth. Oh my goodness, you are an incredibly awesome woman and writer. Do you have any idea what you could do with your words alone? Not to mension your passion and determination behind those words. You are such an inspiration and I am proud to be your sister. I love you and again I appreciate the awarness you are giving. -Val
Truth beyond the Tale Sarah - Thank you for continueing to look critically at the world in which we live and reflect on the the truth that is so often overlooked due to its common existence. What action will spring from knowing the truth?
This whole blog thing...
I have come to see the power in expression. But not just any expression, rather received expression, communcation. I see the amazing prospects for creating a space where the people I know and love can enter into these experiences with me--to learn and grow too. And to continue the dialogue I begin here. To challenge my own forms of expression and observations. And my words come to life when they can see a bit of what I see...
I owe this blog to Rebekah Luhrs. She has taken so many risks and through her experiences she has become a stronger, fuller person. And bec... full info
Jillian Nel
non-member comment
what are you going to do about it?
So you think it's a fantasy? Have you seen the cars that some African people drive? It is not only a white problem- it is a rich problem! Teach them to fend for themselves and although the world might think English is the way - what is their mother tongue and why can't they learn that? I dreamt of going to STellenbosch University but did not get that dream - my parents and my waitressing could not afford it!! I made a new and eventually better plan- at Home in Rural Zululand! Now here in Cape Town I'm teaching in my mother tongue children who don't speak it!?? Wake up and don't blame the past look to the future and what are you going to do about it? Drink more coffee because if you worked hard for your money then you deserve to drink the coffee without a guilty conscience. Birth control and going back to your cultural home is far better than living in squalor in a shack- if all else failed you'd go back home before living in cardboard!