Saturday 6th September Is a Norwegian hangover any worse than a London one? Well frankly when you get the bar bill - yes. At an eye watering £7/pint (well actually less than a pint - 0.4l) getting drunk here was never going to be cheap - and it wasn't. So this morning I have a sore head and an empty wallet. I don't get many hangovers these days, so maybe it is the altitude (about 5000ft), but I feel cack. The driving limit over here is 0.02mg/l which is ¼ of the UK limit. As I finished drinking about 2 am last night (this morning) this is the reason I am lagging behind this morning and updating yesterday's blog. I never made it to Gerainger yesterday. Went for a stunning 4 hour hike in the Jotunheim ... read more

Thursday 4th September There is another contender vying with Norwegian post card photographer for easiest job in the world. Norwegian weather forecaster. If you predicted rain every day you'd be wrong less than 10% of the time which is a far better ratio than the venerable Michael Fish. No wonder Munch painted the Scream. Jesus, did it p1ss down today. Most days it has rained (the memory of a sunny day in Bergen all but forgotten) but at least to date you got the odd break in the rain and occasionally even a bit of sun, but today it just hosed it down all day. Set off from Ulvik towards Voss and even though I knew it was right out of the hotel decided to trust the TomTom which was showing left. Initially I was glad ... read more

Tuesday 2nd September Remind me not to be smug about the weather in future - it absolutely chucked it down today. Anyway loaded up the bike and set off for Ulvik via the old fjord road after nambying my way out of Bergen. Cobblestones may look nice but they are f*cking slippery when wet and the Norwegians seem to have found a super slippy white paint for them - which is nice. Anyway once out of Bergen, what a stunning ride (called route 7 I recall). The road follows a river, which periodically erupted in magnificent waterfalls, for about 20-30 miles before settling in and following Hardanger fjord's shoreline. Check it out on Google Maps - but plot a route through Alvik not Voss. If you think, “hmm that looks like it would be a good ... read more

Sunday 31st August Slept like a baby on the ship last night - an apt analogy: the continual rocking of the ship akin to a rocking cradle. I like ships - you can poke flying and the misery of airports, boats are the way to go. Sea is quite calm this morning, no more than ½-1 metre swell and it is a fair day. Sunnies are a necessity on deck, which is where I am sat writing this. To be fair it wasn't too bad last night either, so I must have misheard the tannoy. Nothing like that crossing of the Bay of Biscay where even the staff said it was really bad, Shame in a way. I guess I am a sick mother, but watching people try and remain dignified while wobbling down the aisles ... read more

The Route As chaotic as my trip appears I do actually have a route planned - I just have not committed it to paper yet. A boring task, but I suppose it makes sense. Its just not interesting to write about. I will use the godawful map facility on the blog site. Given the power of google maps I would have expected better than a straight red line between points, but it will give an idea. One thing I am less clear on is timescales so maybe I'll learn something by doing this too. The current route plan in words then is as follows (although subject to change.) a 1.Ferry Newcastle to Bergen, Norway 2.Bergen 3.Bergen Hardanger fjord and Hardangervidda plateau areas (where I am now) 4.Up by road and ferry to the Sognefjellet road (in ... read more