Poco y poco, my spanish is improving. Now, I can use about 25 verbs. But only in the present tense. The first three weeks of study, Amabilia taught me regular verbs. Those that are conjugated according to “the rules”. After 5 weeks of studying, I’ve progressed to “stem-changing” verbs. They are irregular. They are not conjugated by “by the rules”. Remarkably, as my mastery of the language has gone from “regular” to “irregular”, the opposite has happened to my sense of Antigua, and of myself. What, at first, seem [View Full Entry]

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Luke Skywalker may have defeated the Emperor of Darkness in his part of the universe, but in our world, evil still exists. Despite its beauty and the warmth of its people, Guatemala has been dominated by the forces of evil since the Spanish conquered the Mayan culture in 1524. The ruling Spanish government stripped this agricultural people of the best of its lands, dominating them physically and economically. Since then, political and economic freedom for more than 60% of the population, the Mayans, is virtually non-existent. During the cold war, guerilla groups in Guatemala sponsored [View Full Entry]

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As a kid, my brother teased me for every little mistake. This is the privilege of an older brother. But, I became very self-conscious. Because I am naturally brilliant, I started school when I was only four. And like most young geniuses, I was physically awkward, a ready target for dodge ball bullies. This made me more self-conscious. I learned to take teasing well. My ex-husband once picked me up for a date wearing a t-shirt that said “I’m with Stupid”. But I did not enjoy feeling self-conscious. So I stayed within the confines of those activities that I could [View Full Entry]

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You may be wondering, with all this soul searching are you having any fun, Cynthia? All right. I’ll blow my own cover. I am having a blast. I am lucky to have a full eight weeks this time to study and explore. Other students that live in mi casa have shorter time. I have become fast friends with many of them. There was the beautiful, young Debbie from Newport beach whose rubio (blonde) hair turned heads everywhere she went. She lit up the dinner table with stories of her adventures. And she spoke really good spanish. Joanne from Florida, was intelligent, [View Full Entry]

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The rhythm of my life here is deeply soothing. Like your breath moving in. And your breath moving out. Breakfast, class, lunch, afternoon in Antigua or volunteering, studying, dinner, bed. Everyday. The same gentle routine. Antigua and its strange sights are becoming usual to me. A walk in the open market on Saturday is a symphony of color and unique visual experiences: A man with blouses and skirts hanging all over him for sale. Another selling gold fish in plastic bags in front of a jeep. The bounty of fruit from the fields. Two young boys selling Bic shavers for [View Full Entry]

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My friend, Bob Long, worries that I am too gullible, too soft-hearted, too superstitious, too easily taken. I like to think of myself as having a big heart. Maybe Bob is wrong about me. Coincidences But, running off to Guatemala, sometimes I do question my wisdom. I long to ask the advice of my parents. Too bad they didn’t live long enough to hear me say that! They have both been gone now, many years. Yet, sometimes I know they are communicating with me. Bob would say the things I interpret as communications are just coincidences. Thursday, the school hosted a [View Full Entry]

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You know the feeling. You see the warm orange-yellow ball of the sun setting over the Pacific. You feel expansive. You get chills. Or you see your child sing in the school Christmas play for the first time and your heart is so full that your eyes brim with the the excess love. You get chills. You have an ah-ha moment and understand something that mystified you. You get chills. You see someone and feel really attracted to them and they smile back. You get chills. And maybe lightening. Or maybe, you answer a call deep within you, even though [View Full Entry]

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I’ll tell you a closely held secret. I frighten easily. Now, I know that may come as a surprise to some of you because I act so confident. And I’m trekking off to Guatemala alone. But those of you who know me well will be saying that’s not a secret, CB. Yes, sometimes the world scares me. And I worry. I worry I’ll get fat. I worry that I need to clean out my garage. I worry I’ll get in a car accident. (I don’t worry about that really, but I know some of you do!) I worry I can’t support [View Full Entry]

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My first week of spanish was really fun. I did better than I expected. I thought this would be a breeze, until we started to conjugate verbs. It has been so long since I studied any language I thought conjugation only happen on prison visits. My teacher, Amabilla, is tiny, jolly and patient. She does not correct my every mistake, as does my son. She speaks to me in spanish of her life. I understand about 4 in 10 words. She uses her arms and sometimes her whole body to explain things. Non-verbal communication has new meaning now. Each day [View Full Entry]

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I am sitting at a formica desk circa 1960. It is gray and has little pink and white boomerangs all over it. The lamp on my right has a white, ceramic base with a piece obviously glued back in. The mandarin orange walls have been that color since the 1500’s. They are not inspired by Martha Stewart’s trendy decorating schemes. There are nails from now absent pictures sticking out of them. They, too, are painted orange. Guatemala, like the lamp and the walls, is blatantly imperfect. The streets are bumpy. The sidewalks thin and crooked. The plumbing is weak. Toilet [View Full Entry]

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