listen to your sister

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It's my brother's birthday today. He is turning 18, and I can't be more thrilled and excited about that. I also can't help to acknowledge the distance and it makes my heart ache a little to know that I can't celebrate yet another milestone in his life. I've missed a lot. He may never read this, but as 18 year old brothers go he is definitely in the tops:

He's funny, he's goofy, he's nice, he's smart, he's a good friend, he's good at putting things together, he's thoughtful, he's a guitar hero, he's got manners and uses them frequently, he is very handsome, he's clever, he's curious, he is spectacular at every sport he tries, he's outdoorsy, he treats women well and he is turning out to be an amazing man.

As I sit here drinking wine and listening to Eric Clapton 'groaning the blues' for the 10th time, I realize I certainly don't have my shit together in the conventional sense. I do, however, have something to offer in the tone 'life lessons I know thus far'. Also, I forgot to send a card, so this is your present.

To my brother Brian on your 18th birthday:

live. laugh. love. (ok, obvious). always say thank you, even if you don't mean it. remember to call your mother. wear your seatbelt. always own a plant - even if it's a cactus. don't drink cheap wine. respect your elders. have a favourite song that makes you lose your mind when you hear it. lose your mind often. enjoy the moment. don't stay inside when it's sunny out. don't stay inside when it's raining. love who ever you choose to love but never EVER settle for love. watch documentaries about the world as often as you watch an adam sandler movie. respect other's wishes. wear cologne sparingly. bring flowers. always get a good haircut. know you will break some hearts. learn how to make at least one good meal - spaghetti doesn't count. forgive. stay humble. remember how great you are and fake it when you forget (you'll always remember again). meet and befriend people from other countries - you won't regret this. remember that if a relationship has to be a secret, it's not worth it. read every book I buy you. wear pink - trust me it's hot. have a favourite bar where everybody knows your name. learn how to make wicked power point presentations. live somewhere new for 1 year. don't be a jerk. tip well. travel. never forget where you come from. save your money. pay off all debts fast. fail openly. have a favourite poet. memorize a poem from this favourite poet - "droning a drowsy syncopated tune..". have some hangovers you can tell your grandchildren about. have some heartbreaks to tell your grandchildren about. choose to be kind. give your money or better yet, your time to a charity at least once a year. never have dirty fingernails. be honest most of the time. listen to your sister. realize some friendships are meant to end. allow endings.

I'm proud of you and I love you always. Happy birthday!

Love,

Carly xo

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Photos

Brian
swim champ - i still need water wings

Dorks
we look retarded here

My Last night in Oregon
I always get sad saying goodbye to these babies.

Brian
one more for the ladies :)

Comments

[Dad]

Good advice
another great blog, Carly. I printed it and gave it to Brian at our b-day dinner. He loved it! I always check your blog first and last thing, every day....keep them coming. Take good care of yourself. We all miss you and love you so. See you in my dreams....

[Mum]

smiles and tears
Oh Carly that is sooo nice. I'm sure Brian knows how much you care about him and that was so heartfelt. There's something in there for every day of his life. I think that was so very nice of you to do. Make sure that he knows there's something special on your blog just for him. Made me all teary eyed. You're a good girl. Mum xxoo

[pam]

poignant and beautiful. you're a very smart lady.