The End of the Safari and Gangstas Paradise

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Well I think I have officially developed carpel tunnel syndrome from typing these entries with such speed. Also, I want to complain about a few 'corporate issues' that we have been having. First, Verizon wireless sucks in SA. It has service like 5% of the time, except when being hundreds of miles from the nearest town - then the service is perfect. Sure - that makes total sense. Second, Bank of America is really being annoying - Heathers debit and credit cards are both not working. This caused Heather to experience what can only be described as a breakdown. It. Was. Awkward. But understandable. So until tomorrow, I will be funding her trip on a temporary basis. And yes, I will be charging interest.

On to the matters at hand. We awoke at 530 AM for another early morning for our final game drive. However, during the final night, Heather got up in the middle of the night to use the facilities and I didn't realize it. I heard noises and whispered her way that an animal or worse yet, a person was trying to get in the back window. I grabbed the flashlight and planned to punch whatever it was in the face with it (like I was taught to in my travel briefings), but luckily it was just Heather. It was relatively tense, but in the end, all it amounted to was a high heart-rate.
Mugabe, our ranger for the last 2 days was 'on' and we saw a ton of elephants, giraffes and other animals on the final sunrise drive. We were tracking a leopard and a group of lions, but were sadly not lucky enough to find them before we ran out of time. We said our goodbyes to Pearl (the camp mom) and the guides. I have to say you really feel like you make a personal connection with those people and the other people who were on the trip with you - so it was definitely sad to leave. I will definitely never forget my time in the bush. Its easy to see why Kruger is so famous. We saw lions, leopards (at the rehab center), elephants, buffaloes, rhinos, cheetahs, giraffes, hippos, impalas, zebras, kudus, wildebeests (sorry for butchering the spelling in earlier posts), waterbucks, baboons, vervet monkeys, tons of birds, and a lot of snakes, scorpions, and spiders. That may sound like, or even be, a list from a tourist book - but we saw it all. The area has 147 mammal species, over 500 bird species (which go totally un-noticed because of the other animals), 114 reptile species and 335 species of trees. We really couldn't ask for a better safari lodge, guides, or group to do it with. They are passionate and extremely knowledgeable about all things regarding the bush and its culture and animals. Seeing the culture of the area - the good and bad - was amazing. I have never seen an area like this, nor one with more obvious racial tensions. Its hard to describe, and its not in a bad way - its just evident. I would totally recommend it to any of you, and I got other ideas for future safaris in other areas of the world. But first things first, before my next safari elsewhere, I cannot wait to go back for ranger school 😊

On the way back, we drove through the Blyde River Canyon, a view that is up there with the Grand Canyon. Along the way we stopped at the Three Rondawels - a series of hut-shaped rock formations that overlook the canyon. They are touted as some of the most amazing natural landmarks in SA, and I would tend to agree. We also got to do a little shopping from the local arts and crafts dealers. I got a bunch of good stuff through my intense bartering skills - but I can't say what since they are gifts for some of you reading this. After the stop at the overlook and the canyon, we continued through the diverse towns of Belfast (a POOR shanty town) and less than two miles away, the town of Dullstrom where we stopped for lunch. That was a huge mistake. You have to realize that along with a lot of other places in the world, quick service is not an expectation here. We also quickly learned that when locals say "now now" or "plus or minus __ minutes" - that does NOT mean anytime soon. Lunch, a chicken sandwich, lasted almost 2 hours before finishing the trip to Jo-burg.

As with all of our car trips, we tailgated other cars constantly. I'm not talking US style tailgating, I am talking within inches. Given their reputation for keying on road safety, its a little nerve-racking. Its all part of the experience remember?

We arrived in Johannesburg around 6 PM to the lovely City Lodge Airport. This hotel was better than the Town Lodge in Pretoria, and this is me officially giving a huge shout-out to the City Lodge hotel chain. These are far beyond the Motel 6's of SA as originally sold, they are a slight step up. Apparently our hotel is a media hotel for the World Cup and is filled with media and the Budweiser Hospitality Center. The hotel guys we talked to were explaining that getting Bud in SA is next to impossible and told us that everyone here hates it. Seems like a good idea to have a Bud hospitality area then right?

Anyways, we had a good dinner and off to bed for a full day of tourism. You have already heard me trash Jo-burg for being extremely dangerous and trashy - so... We decided we needed to see for ourselves. When in Rome...

Jo-burg was founded in the late 1880s when gold was found here. It does NOT seem like an African city at all, but instead, reminds me of NYC. The larger Jo-burg area has 11 million people and a lot of traffic. We decided to take a Jo-burg city tour, Soweto tour, and a trip to the Apartheid Museum in the one full day we have in the city for the entire trip. One other funny note - when people figure out we are American, they tell us all about how they heard Obama will be here for our first game. I hadn't heard that at home, but here, I am telling you - people are buzzing. Don't they know most people in America don't care about soccer? Guess not...

Speaking of Presidents - you should Google the president of SA - he is a real gem. He has like 13 kids with 8 wives, has like 6 rape charges against him, and when asked if he is afraid of HIV/AIDS, this role model answered by saying "no, I shower after I engage in this stuff". It really makes you appreciate how while our politicians are dumb - its all relative.

We got another intro to SA from our guide. 42% unemployment across the country (and we think 10 is bad) and much of the nation can be considered almost third world. Downtown had a ton of culture and was full of skyscrapers. It looked worn down and dangerous and as everyone said... It didn't warrant a lot of time to see. We then headed to Soweto, the biggest Township in SA. A township was historically a place where non-whites lived during Apartheid since 95% of all land in SA went to whites. Jo-burg overall has 11 million people - probably in a 100 square mile area - while Soweto, within that area, has 4.5 million in 100 acres. Soweto is the place where Mandela and Desmond Tutu (the only Nobel Peace Prize winners to ever live on the same street) are from, and the place where the Apartheid government was brought down in a series of events that would change SA forever. For those of you, like me, who don't know Apartheid - it was a political system set up in the 1940s to believe it or not... The 1990s that excludes all races, except whites, from pretty much living a normal life. I'd say its on par with Nazism (minus the concentration camps) - yet you have never heard about it.

We were swamped by the most amazing kids when we walked around the township and were totally humbled by what we saw. We finished the day with visits to the Soweto museum and the Apartheid museum. I can officially admit that until today, I knew little about SA and its culture - most of which I learned on this trip - but after today, I can proudly say I am informed and shocked by what happened here and how it was stopped by normal people, and someone I never knew much about - Nelson Mandela.

Our final final stop was Soccer City, the scene of all the big games of the tourney. Security is out of control and the stadium itself was massive (holds up to 100k) and an architectural masterpiece. You will see for yourself.

We had another good dinner, including Castle Beer (the national beer of SA). Ironically, we have also been seeing a sweet MC Hammer commercial for Castle. I thought he was dead - but guess what, he is BACK and still wearing those pants. We also had vinegar covered popcorn as an appetizer. Just saying... You should probably try it.

I guess my only piece of real humor from a pretty intense and serious day would be in regards to the one and only... R Kelly. Yes, that R Kelly. You may remember him from the 1990s, before he was charged with assaulting a child and "other" acts. Tonight is the World Cup kickoff concert and guess who is one of the acts? You guessed it. When I stated "I thought R Kelly was in prison and stopped singing like 10 years ago," one of our Brazilian friends told the whole tour group about seeing R Kelly yesterday. He interrupted me and said "oh no, he is definitely around - but boy has he fallen. I saw him at a McDonalds in Edenvale yesterday." So there you have it... R Kelly is back. I predict a comeback soon, so be on the lookout at your local McDonalds. Ill try not to say I told you so.

Sorry for the long and somewhat serious post, but we are already almost 10 days into the trip which is unbelievable. I knew it would fly by once I got here, but its always a surprise nonetheless.

But the big change around here is that World Cup fever is officially in full effect. Its bringing everyone together with one common bound - soccer. The US vs UK is only 2 days away and everyone has been talking about it. My heart rate is definitely up and I cannot wait for games to start. I hope everyone back home will be supporting the team - because we have the rest of the world (Brazilians, UK, Spanish, Germans - just to name a few that we have talked to) on edge. They're scared of our team's potential, and to tell you the truth - I like it.

Look for me on TV, Ill have a Bocanegra Jersey and an American flag - I should be fairly easy to spot. Hope everyone at home is doing well, and Ill talk to you after the weekend (and hopefully a win). Let's go USA!

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Photos

Pearl, Our Camp Mom
No, not the landlord. This woman is partially responsible for me living through a week in the bush. Ill never forget that.

Soweto
In front of the world famous cooling towers. What an amazing place.