Contemplating Kigali...

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So, I decided that I would give a little bit more information about my time in Kigali, as it is limited. WE have not done many like super interesting things this week so far because we have had some lectures and have done papers and research, etc which is interesting to me because duh, i'm studying that but, not really that interesting to hear about. Today was interesting though, we went to this organization Women for Women which is doing wonderful things for women in Rwanda, among other countries. I really believe in the empowerment of women and encouraging women in business. I think I am surrounded by such successful and intelligent women like my mom, my grandmothers and all of my aunts that it is really easy for me to see how women have the ability to change the world. I think you should all check out the website I think it is womenforwomen.org

So, I would like to tell about the more interesting part of this experience because it is very unique and different from Kampala and I am surprised at many things which I find every day. Anyways, so okay Kigali is much cleaner and more organized than Kampala was but, the people are a whole different story. I thought that people were a bit hostile in Kampala but that hostility here is transferred into something very different here. It is hostility but, also just sheer rudeness and disrespect. Especially towards women. It is very difficult being a mzungu woman here because it is basically like wearing a target on your shirt. I mean not that it isn't safe during the day it is just that women are not given the same respect here as they are in the states by any means. But, there are a lot of ways to view this hostility and I am trying to put it into context with everything that this country and these people have been through but, it is really difficult not to get frustrated or offended or just plain pissed off on a day to day basis dealing with some of the forms which the hostility and disrespect take. Anyways, that is just a little venting.

So, as you all know, I am blessed with great family and great friends and especially wonderful sisters. When I am away anywhere, I always miss my sisters the most regardless of where I am of who I am with because they are absolutely irreplaceable and also probably because they are not too great at the whole digital communication thing (jk). This is not to say that I do not miss my parents, cousins, grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends a lott too but, my heart just aches for my sisters sometimes and there is no way around it. And I have never ever missed them more than when I am in my homestay because I have a very difficult homestay sister. I like to call her my evil stepsister. I am staying with an elder gentleman and his niece, who I am referring to as my sister for simplicities sake. So, yeah, my evil stepsister is absolutely crazy and she kind of looks like a witch. She is 23 and probably the most judgmental person ever and she told me that she is "getting her PhD in dissing" ha. ha. so. funny. she told me i should brush my hair, and then she told me that i needed to get a pedicure because my nail polish was expired, she also told me to shower a bunch of times even though I had just showered or was going to shower like the next morning after I was dirty, she told me that one of my friends should be halted by the fashion police for wearing sandals with a nice outfit. There are so many more things that she has done that are just completely outrageous but, I thought I would just give you a few. I will update you all on her PhD work as time goes on. : )

So, yeah overall Rwanda is absolutely beautiful on the front but, the people have been through a lot, or more than a lot, and I get that. But, at the same time the people are very brusque and the homes and the people we are all staying with are fine but, can be sometimes hard to deal with. I think we all just got really lucky with our Kampala homestays. So, despite the dirt and potholes of Kampala and Uganda as a whole I would prefer it to Kigali. The worst part about the hostility here is that it is only relatively few people who express this hostility but, it makes it very difficult to trust and have faith in the rest of the people.

For example, we met a guy at the wedding he seemed pretty nice. Then, magically he appeared at a bar that we all went to after a football match on Sunday and so we all were talking to him then and he was sitting with us, etc. Then he asked to borrow my friends phone and my friend let him, and then my friend went to the restroom and the kid just walked away. Of course none of us who were just sitting there knew he had our friend's phone because we trusted him. And it is bad because it changes my viewpoint towards anyone else who is actually trying to be friendly. But, I am trying to understand that it is most definitely not a cultural thing that is inherent in all Rwandans whatsoever. It is the result of a culmination of factors that are difficult for anyone to understand.

So, anyways I do not mean to completely bash Rwanda because staying here has been amazing but, I am just looking to express some frustrations and difficulties that I have had. But, overall Rwanda is beautiful and a few of us are going to Gisenyi this weekend, which is on the lake and near a volcano. It is like kind of the little getaway for Kigalites. I am siked.

Much Peace and Love from Kigali
Nessa

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