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Published: December 18th 2010
(P&L)
Hey guys - sorry were late on the blogging, its all been abit mad!! Bangkok is crazy!!
Picking up from where we left off, we had the best sleep EVER thursday night, we did however managed to drag our lazy behinds from the pit at 10am for breakfast.. when we got down to our utter disguist they were packing up! They werent supposed to start packing up til 11!! The bar manager asked us to sit down and he would bring coffee, thank god! well, we thought we were in for jam and toast, which to be honest we were pretty contempt with.. then came the fresh fruit, then the ham, eggs, sausage and salad, THEN french fries, then more ham and sausage..!! we made a smiley face out of the left overs and wobbled back up to the room. We discovered that we were out of money and desperately needed to change some travellers cheques, one of the young lads said theyd take paul so we could get some money for the taxi in to Bangkok, he asked Paulie to wait outside. We wondered why they just asked Paul but we waited outside anyway. Next I heard
a gasp and ''you have got to be sh*tting me'' .. the guy was sat there on a rickety old moped with a helmet smiling up and paul! Oh his face was a picture! I bonded with lenny outside and It seemed like they were gone for AGES. When they returned he looked extremely pale after nearly being taken out by a artic lorry! ha!
Packed and ready to go, the bright pink taxi pulls up for us. We pestered him till he turned on the meter, then he started to blast the cheesy tunes, im talking cascada mixed with take that - full pelt. Yeah, exactly. The 30 mile taxi journey cost us 6 quid! om the way in we notcied the locals putting up seating stalls facing the road, I was about to ask the taxi driver wat they were for.. then I realised it had to be for the Red Bull drivers coming to show off their new car! Paul nearly peed his pants in excitement! The taxi dropped us off at Khao San Road, it was an eye opener. Food and Clothes stalls littered with barterers everywhere!! We donned our rucksacks and set out to
find a hotel. I wanted to hit paul upside the head when he asked me if I wanted to stay in one of the dodgy upstairs rooms that can only be described as.. well MING. We came across a lovely funky hotel with an inside balcony chill out with bean bags and a gorgeous back terrace over the river. Lush, I love it.
We didnt waste a minute and decided to head straight out into bangkok city. There was yellow flags lining the streets and we wanted to find out what was going on as soon as poss! Just before hitting the main road, dopey arse here was too busy looking at something and went ar*e over t*t and pulled the thong bit out of my flip flop.. embarrasing isnt the word. The thais were splittng their sides watching me curse and drag my foot tripping every two feet. I figured id just go get some cheap sandles cause id only brought one other pair, but oh no.. had to be available in all other sizes but my own didnt they!! So I dragged paul back to the hotel to get my trainers (drama over) and we set back
Everyone
Swedes, English and south african enjoying a booze on Khao San Roadout.
We walked along the street in awe, full red kippers and bugs being fried up and bagged to be sold as little as 5 baht (10p). Its just so busy its crazy! We had a little walk around and a thai lady who spoke very good english explained that the flags were the sign of a special buddist holiday. ''today only standing budda free to see! and golden mountain. all free free free!'' .. cue phone call in thai.. cue rickshaw appear.. wed take you only 10baht! .. Christ, no such thing as a free lunch. We politely declined her and walked the other way, feeling slightly regretful but pleased that wed gone with our instints and said no. 20 minutes later ''hey! you guys!'', I heard paul mutter ''stalker'' and sure enough it was her again. She followed us down the road and we managed to lose her wandering back down the main road. We spotted a fresh sushi stall a decided we were going to taste one of each no matter how disguisting they looked. Bloody hell the wasbi (its like a green spicy paste that accompanies it) over here is like 5 times as hot!
even paul has tears welling up!
Onto the massage place.. Paul opted for a foot massage whilst I knew I needed a thai massage. They washed both our feet. I was guided upstairs and paul stayed down (the thought of paul giggling like a girl cause someone was tickling his feet ahd already set my shoulders off!) The tiny lady lay me down on the open top roof on a mattress and contorted me in the most unusual positions (oo err) and cracked things that definitely shouldnt crack! Just as I was getting into it the fat sweaty guy at the side of me let off the biggest fart and that was it I just couldnt stop laughing!!! I went back downstairs still giggling and poor paulie looked shocked, turns out mr unflexible was made to touch his toes hahahaha! It was brill if not a little painful but we both felt lots better!
After a little more wandering about we were in great need of a beer. We found a cool bar and sat with a couple of swedish guys, my god were they funny. Henrik was definitely the mess maker and his friend (who was so laid back we cant remember his name) was definitely the cleaner upper! Whilst lucky ladys were wafting things in his face he just stared and said ''you can waft all you like love, I aint buying anything!!'' We were joined by a rather annoying south african guy who kept grabbing himself and showing off his england tattoo and scouse dave whom we rescued from the annoying south african grabbing guy. Beers starting flowing and we nipped back - impressed with our sense of direction making it home and back within the hour. A little cheeky thai girl convinced paul that If he won her at rock, paper scissors he could have a free rose, if he lost he would have to buy one. He lost. And I have photo evidence of her grabbing his nipple screaming ''HAHA LADY-BOY LADY-BOY!!!'' ... Cut a long story short singapore slings started flowing and so did the purchase of deep fried bugs (grass hoppers, grubs etc) to be consumed by Paul & new Paul. I quote ''have a grass hopper lauren!! they taste like chicken!!''. They had to be confescated as he was enjoying picking the legs out of his teeth way too much... Chang beer, doesnt sneak up on you - just sits there and head butts you in the face, resulting in a rather drunken paulie. We also met an irish jim out of american pie (who really didnt like me calling him jim!!) and I stealth bummed some rather unsuspecting victims (take the girl out of bolton.. and all that!)
This morning we awoke with the mother of all hangovers. Paul went to the drugstore and got some wicked pain killers. We knew we needed to pull it together as today was a pretty big day. The new Redbull F1 car was coming to town and the sun was gleaming. People were everywhere, we swigged a coffee that should be illegal the caffine content was that strong, and squeezed through the crowds. At this point we were starving and although we had a pretty good view, we knew we couldnt stand there for hours. Plus we had no where to stay tonight and needed tgo book ourtrip south. We had every intention of jumping on the sleeper train but it turnes out the only one that wasnt fully booked was to leave at 5pm and arrive at 4 oclock in the morning.. fucccc.. I mean.. stuff that!! Plane it will have to be! After a couple of local travel agents tried to rip us off we wanted to look for ourselves. Internet caf proved us proud and we booked a flight, bus and ferry to Koh Samui for 50 quid each leaving at 6 in the mornin! woo were rockin! Only problem is its from the other airport thats an hour away in a taxi.. so were looking at a 3am get up! grim but definitely worth it!!
We were starving and found an AMAZING rice stall, fried rice with beef and 2 ice cold cokes in a glass bottle all for 70p!!! nom nom nom!!! We waded our way back through and the entire front road was PACKED. Poo 😞 we were convinced we were going to miss the car, there was no way we could see over the crowds! Kids were climbing up trees, standing on stalls, mopeds.. there was just no way. Pauls face was a picture of disappointment until we spotted a lady with a ladder ..
''how much to stand on the ladder???''
''300 baht!''
''ill take it!''
I almost elbowed a lad in the face trying to make her a better offer! Paul got up on the ladder and could see the road perfectly, the whole of the street were jealous, if looks could kill - hed be a dead man. Then the worst happened.
THE CAMERA DIED. No joke. we couldnt believe it. We figured it was the experience that mattered 😊 The new car was awesome, so loud!!! Think Mclaren may be in trouble.. hehe only joking Lewis all the way!!
We headed back through the bustle and down a dodgy back street. The locals are crazy, they have open tin shacks with top range TVs its so funny to see! We made it out in one piece and and back to hotel. We thought it was probably best t o stay in this hotel - not much point in lugging the sacks about when we have to be up so early! Onto the shop to purchase a bottle of 100 pipers whisky to chill on the terrace with the ipod speakers and a pack of cards. I cant believe I lost at my own game. Im great at blackjack but PJA seemed to be on form. SCORE PAUL 10 LAUREN 1. Moving onto pontoon paul dealt, gave me 2 cards and I bust.. im a dumbass. It was lovely watching a local guy fish with a spear for his tea and made us hungry so we went to buy ours. Jungle soup, deep fried fish cakes, red curry fried rice and thai green curry (again, I love it!) we had another wander and some how made it back again to the hotel without even trying. very proud.
Well its half 9 and we need to be up at 3 to head down south, so excited to get on the beach! Hope you guys are enjoying the snow! haha. we'll catch up again as soon as we can!! Missing you all loads already! Layla the acts will start in the south ok!
Adios Amigos!
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ruth
non-member comment
wow!
you seem to be having a brill time. really good updates guys. xxx