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Published: November 26th 2010
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My archetype
A waterfall with a lagoon Salaam! I am in the southern part of Tunisia where life is much more different than the north. The culture is richer in this part of the country. People seem more genuine and so it is easier to make friends. In fact, I was lucky enough to have made a close friend in Sousse and was invited to his home to celebrate a Islamic holiday with his family. The holiday is called Adic Bill and its when all the Muslims sacrifice a sheep in Allah's honor. It was a pretty bloody celebration though, haha, and the poor sheep was still kicking even after they slit its throat! Eek! There was a 8 year old daughter who was braver than me and watched the whole thing without even flinching. The mom cooked a traditional lamb dish called Kamounia and it tasted so amazing. Lucky boy! Next stop: Morocco !
My Archetype I remember there was a question on a science exam that confused the hell out of me. Not because it was difficult but because it just didn’t make any sense. It was a “true or false” problem that went something like this:
Cells in our body are constantly breaking down and regenerating,
A.) True
B.) False
C.) All of the above
What, all of the above?! Excuse me teacher, are you high? How can you have “all the above” in a true or false problem? This statement is true AND false? Haha, I don’t think so... During my adolescent years, everything was so absolute for me. Everything had to be true or false, right or wrong, good or bad. It had to either be one way or the other but definitely not both ways. Because in my mind at that time, if I chose both ways, it meant I was indecisive and too weak to stand up for the side I chose. I had to choose a side and be absolute about it.
Thus, the constant struggle of identity was born inside of me. This absolute way of thinking did not create structure, it created chaos.
Observe this scenario of when I was younger: I am a man therefore I must act like a man. A man should do this, this and that. If I behave in some other way, then I am a woman or a gay. A
The valley
Looks like a scene fro, star wars big “absolute” for a man is that they should not enjoy shopping. Uh oh. Oh no… I love shopping! I like going to the shopping district and when I feel really sad, I’ll go shopping to feel better.
Holy shit, Vic, you’re a woman. This is not how a real man should act. You better hide this from all your friends otherwise they’ll think of you as less of a man. Even though it was something that made me happy, I suppressed it so that I could reinforce the idea that I was an absolute man. This created struggle in identity.
Observe yet another scenario. I am a Taiwanese with a heavy influence of American culture. Being absolute, I had to choose a side and so I chose to identify myself as a Taiwanese rather than an American. Although I proclaimed myself as a true Taiwanese, my Taiwanese cousins would keep calling me American. Even my parents were calling me American. It hurt that I chose a side and my own side could not embrace me. Because of this, I kept striving to be “more” Taiwanese. I bought a shirt that said, “I am Taiwanese.” I learned all about
Taiwan history and pretended to give a damn about Taiwanese politics. I forced myself to listen to Taiwanese pop music even though I hated it. I was so confused about who I was because I had an absolute mindset and neither side accepted me as their own. I longed to belong. Again, a constant struggle of identity.
But now, everything is different. Through this journey I have discovered something about myself that has unlocked my absolute mindset and freed me from my struggle of identity. I have discovered my archetype.
Carls Jung, the great grandfather of psychology, spoke in great lengths about something he called an archetype. It’s a deep and complex subject that was only made clear to me through reading it on Wikipedia:
“The archetypes… the foundation of which each individual builds his own experience of life, developing an unique array of psychological characteristics. Thus, archetypes may arise as innumerable images, symbols and patterns of behavior. Being unconscious, the existence of archetypes can only be deduced indirectly by examining behavior, images, art, myths, etc.
In a personal exploration of the Self, such archetypes play an important role in the process of A Dic Bill
Muslim festival where family are together to eat lamb: After they killed this poor sheep, they blew air into her so its easier to shave individuation: 'what we call "symbols of transcendence" are the symbols that represent man's striving to attain this goal'
This is the simplest explanation I could find but to make it more basic; an archetype is a symbol that represents me in the deepest sense. It is buried in my unconscious mind and a way to discover it is to have total self awareness or meditate. Luckily, I’ve been on a “personal exploration of the Self” for the past year and it has allowed me to go deep in my unconscious mind to discover this symbol. Everybody has their own unique archetype. My archetype is a waterfall with a lagoon beneath it.
For an unknown reason, I was always drawn to places that had a waterfall with a lagoon under it. There was a magnetic attraction to it that made me travel arduously through the most challenging roads to get there. When I reached it, there was a familiar sense of peace and excitement, which made me feel like I belonged there. It’s strange because peace and excitement are opposites of each other and yet, I was comfortable with it. I didn’t need a feeling of absolute peace
Family
I was the guest of honor to attend this festival! cool or absolute excitement. I was experiencing both at the same time and didn’t need to struggle to identify which part of it was me. I was happy with the contradiction.
But it isn’t just the feeling that a waterfall with a lagoon gives me that makes it my archetype, it’s the symbolism behind it. The waterfall represents the adventurous side of me while the lagoon represents the peaceful side to me. For those who know me, I am like a waterfall: I am constantly seeking for new excitements where I can jump off a cliff to get my adrenaline pumping. I keep moving and keep going with the flow. However, at the same time, I have a peaceful side to me that remains still like a lagoon at the bottom of a waterfall. The lagoon part of me can go on 10 day meditation retreats. I can sit on my surfboard and wait patiently for hours before a wave comes along. Two opposing sides of me and yet, they coexist as naturally as the waterfall with the lagoon. In the deepest sense, this is me.
I suffered in the past because I was going against who I
kamounia
traditional lamb, mmmm was; I was forcing myself to choose one side instead of embracing both sides. To realize my archetype is a waterfall with a lagoon is important because now I know I can be comfortable with my contradictions. I don’t need to keep struggling to identify which part of me is which for I am simply both. No more absolutely right or absolutely wrong. No more absolutely Taiwanese or absolutely American. I am Taiwanese American. I am a womanly man. I am a handsome Shrek. I have found peace in chaos. I can be me with no confusion or struggle and it feels so incredibly free. I am a waterfall with a lagoon under it and to know my archetype means I have taken a big step towards finding my true self. From now on, I choose to be C.: All of the above.
It is only possible to live the fullest life when we are in harmony with these symbols; wisdom is a return to them Carls Jung
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Jenny
non-member comment
Both
You have found your own Yang and Ying inside. I am sorry to have put you on the confusing growing environment. But whatever growing path we are through, there is always contradition and everyone is always looking for identity. Only when we can accept both Yang and Ying sides of ourself then we can have peace in mine. However it is no wending road. The only way we can go is try to be aware of bothsides and always keep in balance. I wish to be your lagoon, silently supporting you with softness, my dear son!