A 5 day piss up in Singapore... can't go wrong!

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Spent a night in Omar's backpackers the night before going to Singapore where I met a Canadian lad called Rielly but when we tried to go out on the piss that night and realised that there were absolutely no bars whatsoever in the entire town we both decided that the next day we were gonna HAVE to get off to Singapore coz I can't deal with that!
Coach journey there was the first pleasant one I can remember so come 3:30pm we were sat in Little India Singapore looking for a hostel. LP bigged up The Inn Crowd up to fuck but they had no room but Fragrance Hostel 5 doors down did dorms for the same price so checked in there instead. The place is like a 4 star hotel so couldn't recommend it more but atmostphere at the Inn Crowd was far better so booked a dorm for next day once we were sorted. While at the Inn Crowd outside having a pint, Gareth the kiwi who I'd been out drinking with in on Pulau Tioman bumped into us at the bar and said hello - random as! From there we went drinking at Inn Crowd bar round the corner; Baa Bar Black Chic then headed off to some market where they had a beer shop selling all sorts of Asian beer such as Tsingtao and Chang so I was in my element - cushtie! Gareth had to be at work for 7am but me and Rielly were up for around 10ish to get our free breakfast of eggs on toast, can't complain really?!
Checked out for 11 and headed over to The Inn Crowd to check in but it wasn't until after I'd paid for 4 nights in one go that they told us we weren't in the main bit with free pool, internet and table footy but the scratty place round the corner with fuck all in it - bastards! Ah well, shit happens. Once we were sorted we got the MTR to Raffles Place and went to Raffles Hotel for a beer (coz you've just got to in Singapore really), the from there we got off to the Battle Box - an underground bunker used in WW2 and we were glad we did coz it was bang on. Our guide knew absolutely EVERYTHING about it so it was well informative, there was one point where he goes "if I touch on that then I'll still be going 3 days later", and I don't doubt for a second that he would be doing and all! There was a $5 all you can eat BBQ at Baa Bar that night so couldn't help but take advantage but it turned out to be shit in the end so decided to drown my sorrows in the pound a pop bourbon and coke and that definitely worked. Met 2 girls from Derby that were staying in our dorm tat night, Izzy and Tracy, so just got shitfaced with them like. When Baa Bar shut we wandered over to the next street to Mohican Bar which, although it only played rubbish Indian pop music - had a pool table, sold cheap beers and was open till 5am so couldn't complain.
Didn't wake up till 1pm next day (understandably), and since we were all in the same dorm it was easy enough to get back on it again. Got a few funny looks off people that morning so I'm guessing we were probably pretty loud when we got in last night (16 bed dorms aren't the best place for a pisshead eh?!), but this became a regular ocurrance over the time I was there but I do struggle to be quiet when I'm leathered I've gotta say. Reilly's flight to Bangkok was that afternoon so said our bye's then us 7 (Izzy, Tracy, Paul + Tom - 2 Essex lads we'd met the previous night, and 2 Swedes we met too), went off in search of a good fry up, every fucking place was shut though so the only other option was a curry (we were in Little India like), it was good shit and all for only 2 quid each served to you on a palm leaf - novel breakfast eh?! Paul and Tom fancied a trip to Raffles and I wanted to find the main bar and all since me and Reilly had only been for a drink in the courtyard the previous day so us 3 and the 2 Swedes set of in search of the place again. We eventually found the Long Bar but it was badly names in all honesty - I've worked on bars longer than that bastard ffs! Had to get a Singapore Sling just for the sake of it, as I walked across the place I could hear a crunching noise underfoot and when I looked down the entire floor was jsut littered with peanut shells - you scruffy twats! If you can't beat them join them though I say so us lot tanned 1 and half pots of them just to get our money's worth, check the pic for the proof! lol.
The hostel were organising a trip to the Night Safari back at the hostel so we pegged it back there to make it with seconds to spare, Izzy and Tracy were coming and all so all 5 of us crammed ourselves into the minibus and off we went. The entire journey was spent debating our accents, us northerners definitely came out on top though you'll be glad to hear coz there were more of us plus we just speak better full stop anyway so there... ;o) Night Safari was really good, we got grilled off some bint on the way round on the train for chatting so much though with her exact words being "don't make me feel ashamed of being British", but water off a duck's back I'm afraid luv. Got a Ben & Jerry's on the way out then got absolutely steaming once again in Mohican Bar. We tried to watch the Chelsea game but everywhere was shut except for one little cafe we went in but they were that engrossed in their soaps I think I woulda been lynched if I'd switched the channel over!
Surprisingly I had no hangover the next morning so the 5 of us were up and about for 10 to go and get our free eggs on toast and cups of tea in the main kitchen. Had a few games of pool with Paul, got bollocked off the people who ran the place about 4 times for putting my drink down in the wrong place (as good as that place was they didn't half get up their own arse on rules and that, talking me like a naughty a schoolkid's just gonna rub me up the wrong way and all luv so get down off your hjigh horse eh?!), then come 12 Paul and Tom were off getting their coach to KL. Went for a wander round the malls on Orchard Road with Izzy and Tracy but nowt took my fancy so by 4pm I was sat in yet another bar with a pint in me hand. Some random guy from the Bahamas came and introduced himself and jibbered on for 10mins but he had an appointment or summat so he was soon out the place so we went to get some scran down the road and when we got back them 2 had their plane to Cairns to catch - and then there was one...
I decided on a bit of retail therapy so wandered over to the main electronics market (Sim Lim Tower), and bought meself a slick as Sony Ericsson K750i mobile for 160 quid so couldn't complain. While I was sat in the communal area back home charging my phone I bumped into the 2 Swedes again who said they were off to see Placebo play on Orchard Road for free at some fashion show so I sorted myself out in 5 minutes flat and off we went! Got there with time to spare but the tent was absoltely rammed so they weren't letting any more people in, luckily there was a 7/11 right outside and a huge screen so we just sat on the pavement getting leathered so I've now heard Placebo play live but still never seen them - gutted! Dragged them two back to the Asian beer shop for another Tsingtao (loving that shit you know!), then it was on to the Prince of Wales for a few. Met a lad called Anthony who was from New Mills (jsut down the road from where I'm from), who had once worked for Links Audi and knew Jane my Dad's girlfriend then jsut to top it off his mate Dan when he heard I'd been living in Mac for the last couple of years and asked me my address could actually tell me what cars we had parked on our drive coz he lived 5 doors further down - how fucking mad is that?! "Ah yeah, your Dad's got the blue Audi TT hasn't he?" - fook me! lol. Met a sound cockney called Gary and all so us 4 and Malou (the fit Swedish lass), jibbed across the road to Mohican Bar again. The owner was absolutely loving me by now coz every time I went in I brought a group of people in who sll loved the beer so it was guaranteed cash in the till really seeing me. "Ah Mr Dan, you want bombay mix and Tiger?". Too right kid, you know the score fella! Only bad part, like I said, was the bangra music blaring out in there but considering we were the only Westerners in there we had to let it lie. After a couple of hours drinking in there we decided it was finally time we made an appearance in the world famous club Zouk only to discover that Gary, Dan and Anthony all couldn't get in coz they had shorts on, me and Malou wandered in regardless though coz we looked respectable and we had to say we'd been really eh since we were staying in Singapore?! They were just playing the last tune as we got in, just my bloody luck! Ah well, Malou was still up for drinking so we jumped in a taxi and told him to take us to any late night bars; cushtie! Dunno what the place was called like but we had a good laugh and didn't leave till 8am so can't complain really, when we got back to the dorm Malou had to get her coach to KL in only 30 minutes so she was staggering around packing her stuff up which was highly amusing to me but I thanked god I wasn't in the same position! lol.
Shite, rough as today, wonder how Malou's coach journey went?! When I eventually dragged myself out of my pit around 2:30pm I decided on a trip to the science museum to check out the Star Wars exhibition so I've now seen all the original in person except for Yoda who's my favourite but still glad I went though coz it was pretty good. That night I went for tea at The Prickly Bush (class name!), but hardly ate owt coz the hangover was still in full force so the only way to sort it was get back on the sauce really wasn't it? Met a sound Brummy lad who I found out I'd pissed off royally that morning coz he was staying in my dorm and I'd set my phone alarm but was too comatosed to switch it off so it'd been ringing for the best part of an hour (and there's me wondering why everyone in my dorm hated me), but he was alright so no worries, plus I met a Nottingham lad that was far too smug about having driven Ferrari's and Lambo's but apart from that was decent enough. An hour or after meeting them Gareth wandered in too so the three of us just got bladdered in there. I've gotta say, I'm not usually a fan of Sambuca but that night I had an iced Sambuca; you put a load of ice in a cocktail shaker, back the Sambuca in, shake it for a minute or so then pour it out. It comes out cloudy so I thought it was mixed plus it went down that easy but it was straight out the bottle so definitely gonna remember that one coz it was fit as! The Prickly Bush shut at 12 so when the closed their doors Gareth and the Nottingham lad jibbed to bed but us two were still up for a beer or three so once again it was back to the Mohican for a good 3 hours, for a big lad I was amazed that I drank better than him too - he was slurring his words all over the place! I suppose 4 months solid drinking's gonna get your tolerance up though eh? ;o) Can't wait for my 6am start tomorrow...
Surprisingly enough I did it piece of piss so by 6:20am I was flagging down a taxi out on the main road. Checked onto my flight (thankfully remembering to get my Aussie passport out of my bag before it went off down the conveyor belt), then it was off to claim my tax back on my phone (god knows how I remembered to do this!). Had a quick scan round duty free and got 400 Marlboro Lights for 18 quid even though you're only allowed 250 but I was willing to take the risk (paid off too!), then at 7am that morning I decided to have my last beer in Asia before getting on the plane, depressing eh?! 9:20am came round and I was off on my way to see my mate Gaz in Perth - mint!
And so ends my 4 month trip round Asia, bloody depressing how quick it's gone but it's been the best 4 months of my life to date so wouldn't change it for the world, start of a new life in Oz from here on in! I had a proper mint time in Singapore too even though it cost me a small fortune, you can probably guess it was good by the size of this essay I've written but had to get it all down here. Catch up with ya's in Oz peeps... ;o)

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Photos

The prickly bush...
Class name for a bar that innit? The owner's must be English. lol

Baa Bar Black Chic
Gareth, Tracey and Rielly on pound a drink night, can't go wrong! ;o)

Me and Malou
Hadn't got the hang of me phone by now but you get the idea ;o)

My last beer in Asia :o(
Sat in the airport at 6am waiting to fly to Perth - perfect time for a beer in my books! ;o)

Jabba the Hut
You fat bastard, you fat bastard - who ate all the pies?! lol

The closest we got to Placebo
Shocking eh, we go to see them and the closest we got was the pavement... (I know this wasn't them btw, they came on soon after though coz this was actually a fashion show)

Zouk - see I made it!
Not as if a DJ was playing at this point but like I care!

No good hiding behing that bottle luv
Not as if I was minding by this point but like I care!

R2-D2
Cushtie - seen the real life one now and all!

My peanut pile...
All them tanned in 30mins, gotta say though; I got me money's worth ya fuckers! Ha ha

Nicholas, some Aussie bloke and Malou
Don't think they were ready for that one eh? Least Malou looks fit though doesn't she? (as if she could look anything else?)lol

Inside the battle box
Not like they're moving but it was pretty good still

Fast & the Furious eat your heart out!
It was slick as, slag me off all you want but I was impressed....

Paul at Raffles
Keeping the English form up - poshest hotel in Singapore and we're riding round in a luggage trolley - game on!

Comments

[shelster]

a up dan the man
oh well dan hope ya ok mate just thought i'd saay hello

[jonny]

you stink of shit

[Are Kez]

Bastad ya'!
That guy in red is so hot, can I have jhis number please? Miss you Dan, the nigth we spent naked on top of that hotel in Singapore was brilliant. Keep sending me them stiff pictures. X x x