Chiang Mai

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Whilst Sam slept well, I drifted in & out of an uncomfortable sleep, waking to either a stiff neck or dead wrist from leaning on it for too long. A subconscious reminder that I was supposed to do something before we left Sukhothai played on my thoughts & funnily, it was the pack of waiting taxi drivers that provoked the thought whilst unloading our bags from the bus, in the sweltering afternoon heat - the mobile phone. I was supposed to charge the mobile phone so we could call Dean to get picked up & taken to TK’s, eliminating the need to speak to, or deal with any of the taxi drivers. Luckily my memory served me well enough to remember how much Dean had paid for his taxi to TK’s & so knowing that it shouldn’t be anymore than 70 Baht, we approached the pack & began negotiations. Employing my finely tuned negotiation skills & calling upon Oscar-winning acting, I secured the taxi for 60, but little did the unsuspecting taxi driver know, that when I told him I was speaking to the owner of the TK’s guesthouse to confirm what the price of the taxi should be, I was in fact speaking into an uncharged mobile phone; that was off.
Sam & I were far too busy soaking up the fresh sights that Chiang Mai had to offer, to notice that we had turned down a small alley way, off the main road, & were now parked up outside TK’s. The taxi driver helped us sprawl our bags onto the open front office of ‘TK’s Guesthouse & Tour Services’, where we did notice, sat in the internet café just to the left of us was Dean. A grunt through the door was sufficient to catch Dean’s attention & he quickly joined us & made introductions to the man parked at the front desk - T. After the introductions & formalities were out of the way, we lumbered up the 4 flights of stairs to room 403 (next door to Barry & Elaine, who had arrived a day before us), flung our bags onto the spare double bed, washed the grime from our faces that had accumulated from 7 hours travelling & joined Dean downstairs in the internet room. As luck would have it, Dean was just on his way out hoping to find the “free” nearby waterfall to chill out by, which sounded just the trick after been cramped on a bus for 6 hours. The bike TK gave us was brand spanking new & not only rode well, but looked the part with the black & red optional Honda go-faster stickers, set off against the brilliant white outer shell. Oblivious to any roads or directions that we passed on the way in, Sam & I were totally reliant on Dean’s good sense of direction & his shabby map to navigate us to the waterfalls. We followed Dean through the crowded traffic around the first part of the moat that circles the centre, back down the way we had just come from, back up the way we had just come from, from coming from, before realising that we were now on course. No one actually knew where the waterfall we were heading for was, all that we knew was that it was the free one. By “free”, we anticipated that it would probably amass to nothing more than a small stream, however, after finding the ‘non-free’ waterfall i.e. National Park complete with an entrance fee, we finally found our waterfall back down the winding mountainous road. As we pulled up & parked in between the other messily parked bikes, we were met by 4 small playful dogs, & Sam being Sam, had to join in with them, before we were all lured up towards the entrance of the waterfall by the delicious aroma of barbequed fish & chicken that was being carried on the cool breeze. Reluctantly however, we gave into temptation, as we wanted to save ourselves for the ‘big reunion’ feast, so settled for a Chang which accompanied us on the way up to the waterfall. It wasn’t a long or difficult walk up to an open area where small families enjoyed an afternoon picnic & kids ran & splashed about in the mountain chilled water. The waterfall wasn’t as spectacular as Erawan falls by any means; but it had its own pleasant feel about it. Happy children running about enjoying the pools of crisp water, families enjoying each others company & an incredible view of the city - escaping the hustle & bustle of the lower grounds. Sam, Dean & I enjoyed the peacefulness & caught up on each others travel’s, staying at the falls for a couple of hours before a dusky light started to fall on the city below, so we made a move & headed back to TK’s.
Still with no bearings, we were totally reliant on Dean to lead the way back to TK’s, however it seemed that Dean’s sense of direction wasn’t in sync & so we ended up getting lost. Very lost. We roughly knew where we should be, but just couldn’t work out how to get there & only after riding further & further away from where we were staying; we turned around & by complete chance stumbled on the Boots store that was on the corner, signifying that we weren’t far. Just for safe measure, Dean called Kieran to clarify where we had to go from Boots. The actual turning we needed was just across the road, on the other side of the moat. Five minutes after calling Kieran, we were stood with him & Kate outside TK’s catching up with each other. Kieran & Kate had spent the day swinging through the tree canopies attached to zip wires with ‘Flight of the Gibbon’, one of the many excursions TK had on offer to book for you. Another excursion that had caught my eye when we arrived was the mountain biking with ‘Mountain Biking Chiang Mai’. Whether it was the action packed flyer with pictures of riders tackling the tough downhill terrain, or flying over fallen trees, I was drawn to it & had to do it. Kieran felt the same, & so did Dean, but unfortunately for Dean, whilst embarking on another thrill seeking activity the day before, he dislocated his shoulder whilst attempting to dive off the 3rd tier diving board, of an Olympic standard diving pool, thus ruling him out. As Kieran & I were free of any dislocated joints, we booked it for the following day.
New to Chiang Mai, Sam, Barry, Elaine & I were happy to take the others recommendation of where to eat, a place just down the road originally named John’s. John’s restaurant was split into 2 floors. We sat on the top, over looking the busy road below us & studied the menu. John’s menu was a miss-mash of Thai, Western & Indian dishes & after careful selection we all ordered. Sam & I played it safe & just went for an Indian type curry, whilst others like Kate opted for Cordon Bleu, or as it was spelt in the menu “Gordon Blue”. A mixture of Chang, Breezers, bad food, but better company paved way to the start of a good night, celebrating in the usual style when we were all together. After we finished up at John’s we went back to TK’s where we were picked up & taken to watch Mui Thai, better known outside of Thailand as Thai Boxing. Everyone wanted to see Mui Thai & T had assured us that the fights wouldn’t’ be fixed, would be good weights & our thirst for blood would be quenched.
We climbed up the wooden benches, high into the corner where we had a good view of the ring. The smell of deep heat lingered in the damp air & the band sat in the corner, just before the toilets started up the traditional Mui Thai music, prompting the fighters to exercise the traditional rituals before the dinging of the bell signaled the first round, of the first fight.

Four fights in it was apparent that T had just spun us what we wanted to hear, it was a load of rubbish, most of the fights turned out to be young boys, jumping around the ring sizing each other up, occasionally throwing a punch or kick in their opponents direction, welcomed with jeers from the mob of Thai men at ring side, betting on the fights. Sam, Dean & I hung around until the end of the 4th fight before deciding we’d had enough, I was conscious of the grueling day I had ahead of me & we were both tired from the travelling, so Sam & I went to bed leaving Barry, Kieran, Elaine & Kate to watch the final fight of the night, & Dean to bugger off to one of the bars at the end of our road on his own.

Kieran & I woke early, 08:30 am, & met at the front of TK’s where not long after, we were picked up by a pretty old & well worn 4x4 truck, that looked like it had had some rough & tumble in it’s prime. Wasting no time, we clambered into the back, where we joined another 4 or 5 people who were also participating. The old red 4x4 then steadily made it’s way around to 3 other resorts, picking up 5 more people, Helena, a lady from Norway, some fat western guy & his Thai chick ‘who love him long time’ - who was well dressed for a days mountain biking in her mini skirt & high heel shoes, & finally the 2 adrenaline junky Yanks, who actually could have just walked across the road to Mountain Biking Chiang Mai. We all shuffled up to accommodate the 2 additional bodies, before the 4x4 swung around & pulled up just across the road from the Yanks hotel. Signaled to get out, we climbed out one-by-one where we were greeted by a big American guy, who obviously ran the joint, however looked like he hadn’t been on a mountain bike for a while. First-things-first, we had to get our helmets & as the American paced around the group bellowing out how we should choose our helmet, as if there should be a natural, yet unexplainable bond to it, I had already sized up the red one, which after a few adjustments fit snug on my head. Kieran opted for the bright yellow one, which sat awkwardly on top of his head, hanging slightly to the left. Now that we had chosen our helmets, or they had chosen us, we all went inside to confirm our level of expertises, or not, & the course we would be riding. Kieran & I, naturally being intermediate mountain biker’s, who just hadn’t ridden a mountain bike for over 5 years, a part from around a car park, decided to opt for ‘The Old Smugglers Route’ - an intermediate route, not to be taken lightly. Set at 5400 (ft) elevation above Chiang Mai, the 35km smugglers route of mostly downhill, off road, cross-country biking, passed through pine forest, jungle & coffee plantations before finishing in Samoeng Valley, some 4 hours later. So, this course was well suited to our biking ability. And joining us was Helena, who had ridden the route a couple of days previous, & a guy from Australia who didn’t divulge his name, but did tell us in his dreary tones about how he had spent the last 13 days locked in his hotel room as the ATM had swallowed up his card & the credit card he had, he didn’t know the PIN number for & he had also been ill with food poising for the last 3 days. Once everyone had been checked off, signed the disclaimer & insurance form, we were split into 2 groups & then jumped into the 4x4 trucks, loaded with the bikes strapped to the roof.

We made one pit stop for petrol & high energy refreshments before ascending to the rendezvous point. The truck I was in pulled up first, so we started unloading the bikes from the roof, then about 5 minutes after, the second truck pulled up. It turned out that the second truck that Kieran was in, had to pull over as the Thai girl suffered motion sickness from the winding mountain roads. All of the bikes were unloaded whilst we kitted up with our helmet, knee, shin & elbow protectors & gloves, followed by the formal safety briefing on how to use the bikes safely & properly. Once that was out of the way, the only thing left to do was a quick exercise to demonstrate one’s ability to use the brakes effectively. Very simple, very easy. Well at least for some of us. It proved slightly more difficult for the Thai girl however, especially given that she had never ridden a mountain bike before, so watching her attempt to, was very amusing. Full of laughs, courtesy of the Thai girl, our group got under way. In the group, including Mechu our instructor/guide were 5 of us: Kieran, Helena, the boring Australian guy who for the sake of the story I’ll refer to as… Oswald, & me. With all formalities out of the way we started our high speed decent. Two minutes in, we found ourselves speeding down a dirt track, & it was only whilst following Mechu, jumping from the left, over a gaping split in the middle of the track, across to the right, that the advice ‘not to copy the guides’ dwelled on me, & no soon had the thought come & gone, reality hit, fairly abruptly & relatively hard. It wasn’t so much the jump, but the combination of going too fast & landing on the big rock on the right side of the track that led to me taking one tumble with the bike, before smashing into the bushes that gave camouflage to the anchored rocks which helped slow me down, as well as split my knee & finger open. As quickly as we had started, we had stopped. Kieran helped pull me up out of my mangled state, & passed me back my bike. After dusting myself off & checking for broken bones, we got straight back into it & fell into position again, trailing just behind Mechu. Ten minutes after my mishap we reached our first scheduled stop, the coffee plantation. The view was amazing, row after row of coffee plants cut into the mountain side, surrounded by hillside forest & bright blue skies. After taking a few pictures & soaking up the beautiful scenery, it was time to address my wounds, that weren’t causing too much gyp, but needed to be cleaned with medical alcohol. First was the knee, as the knee was the easiest to get to, second was the finger, which proved a little trickier as the blood & dirt had dried & in doing so, had bonded the glove to my finger.

Mean while in a distant world, far from the blood, sweat & gears Sam & Kate were planning a nice & relaxing girlies day. No boys & their Chang, just ‘chill-laxing’ by a poolside, catching some rays. The one problem they were faced with however was TK’s didn’t have the pool they so desired. And thus, the hunt was on to find a pool that would accommodate their every need at one of the 4 star hotels near by. Fortunately for the girls, that hotel just happened to be a stones throw away from TK’s. Siri Lana had all the traits of a luxury 4 star hotel, big plush rooms with hand carved four-poster beds, fancy dining, mini rolled up hand towels in the bathroom; stacked in a wicker basket next to a plant pot Orchid, but more importantly it had a swimming pool, & Jacuzzi, & comfortable sun loungers. In keeping with the 4 star luxury, it also had 4 star prices, so for any bum, or 2, to just wonder in off the street & use the pool, it would cost the best part of 200 Baht per person. So without a thought the money exchanged hands & quicker than the lady at the service desk could register it on the touch screen till, Sam & Kate had strategically positioned their loungers & were lay face up, towards the glaring morning sun.

It was only a few hours into the girl’s self indulgence & they were hardly half baked before things took a turn for the worst. Kate started to experience cramp & muscle spasms in both her hands & feet, which was promptly followed by vomiting & stomach cramps, similar symptoms to what Sam went through back in Kanchanaburi. And it was thanks to Sam’s first hand experience that she knew she needed to get Kate to rehydrate to get some fluids back into her body. However at this point Kate was starting to panic & started screaming bringing the attention of the hotel staff & the couple that had recently joined the pool side. Everyone was concerned & equally keen to offer their assistance, so whilst the staff, John & his wife lay around Kate massaging her arms and legs to help relax her muscles, another member of staff called for an ambulance. Sam & Kate were accompanied to the hospital by John who was a massive help & stayed with Sam & Kate through the consultation with the doctor, which confirmed Kate had food poisoning, with the likely culprit being the “Gordon Blue” from the night before, but because Kate was so dehydrated, she was required to spend the night in hospital for observation whilst she was treated.

Back in the mountains heading down towards Samoeng Valley, Kieran & I were oblivious to Kate’s & Sam’s situation, focused on tackling the down hill route through the pine forest which wasn’t the fast paced down hill action we had already experienced, this was slower, required good balance, constant squeezing of the brakes & the use of the technique we had been taught earlier i.e. to lean back, get the bum right passed the seat, push the toes into the peddles & loosen the arms to help absorb the bumps, which we completed with no instances of injury. Speeding off down a challenging track, we all lost sight of Mechu & stupidly, not having learnt from my earlier fall, I picked up my pace to try & catch him up, only slowing when I startled myself by nearly riding off the side of the mountain. Kieran followed close behind, leaving Helena & Oswald further up the hill. As we skidded to a stop where Mechu was sat waiting for us, we heard a cry for help from Helena. We quickly scrambled half way back up the hill to find Oswald sat on the floor, drained of any colour, clenching his hand whilst a steady stream of blood ran down his arm. Whilst Mechu addressed the wound, Kieran & I peered over the edge of the mountain & saw the bike 12 meters down in the dense bushes, he’d gone over the corner I nearly did & in doing so, had sustained a bad gash to his finger. After retrieving the bike from the mountain side, Mechu swapped over the brakes so the Oswald could use his other hand to brake & steadily make his way down the less challenging tracks whilst the rest of us went on, crossing paths at different stages of our decent where we encountered more fast paced down hill action, some up hill (which was a killer) & more nerve testing riding down near enough vertical hills, off the beaten track.
Not long after pulling up for another break, Kieran got a call from Sam regarding what had happened to Kate & where they both were, but being in the middle of nowhere, we were unable to do anything other than make it to the pick up point, in Samoeng valley. We weren’t riding for too much longer before we made it to the valley where we managed to get our breath back after a day of thrilling riding, have some lunch & a couple of much needed bottles of Chang before being picked up & heading straight for the nearest hospital to drop off, unbelievably, the only casualty of the day to have his finger stitched back together, & as fate would have it, to the same hospital where Kate was being treated & where Kieran would end up staying the night.

The next day Sam, Elaine, Barry & I went to chill out at Siri Lana’s pool side, lounging around, basking in sun & being the riffraff that we are, drinking & eating our own beer & food that we had smuggled in, which the hotel staff didn’t seem to mind, or if they did, it wasn’t made obvious. Nice & frazzled from a day of doing absolutely nothing but lying about in the sun, we took a short walk back to TK’s where we caught up with Kate & Kieran, who both looked shattered after Kate’s ordeal & understandably wanted to have an uneventful night on their own to get back on track. Sam & I decided that we would head for the famous Chiang Mai night bizarre which wasn’t too far from where we were staying, but seemed further thanks to getting lost around the moat. After helplessly riding about for half an hour looking for the night bizarre, we eventually stumbled on it after taking a wrong turn up a one way street. On either side of the busy main road, small stalls stretching as far as the eye could see lit up the night sky, with late night traffic adding to the ambiance. Hundred’s of people walked in single file, up & down the road, stopping to inspect the genuine quality of fake hang bags, t-shirts & watches or admire the handicraft of hand carved Buddha statues mixed in with cheap, mass produced tourist souvenir tat. Cutting through the dense traffic, we parked up at the bizarre entrance which served as a car park by day, & at night, was transformed into a vibrant, busy night market with tantalizing aromas of delicious food wafting through the air, from the many busy restaurants set to the east of the entrance. With nothing particular in mind to buy, Sam & I took a leisurely walk around the first part of the bizarre & then followed it back out onto the main road turning right & walking up the road, before crossing & heading back on ourselves down the other side. Most of the stalls sold exactly the same things, the only variation often being either the final asking price or the friendliness of the seller. As we browsed we came across some beautifully arranged Butterfly pictures, which were tempting enough to buy, if only the price to post them back home wasn’t double of what they cost. As we neared the end of the bizarre, we grabbed some food from one of the Chinese restaurants, before heading back to TK's for the evening.

Our last day in Chiang Mai was spent doing everything other than something. We chatted with other people from T’s who would afford us their time, played cards & generally just hung about with no cause. One guy we got speaking to was Pete. Pete was from Australia, but of Irish decent & liked to drink & swear a lot, but all in good jest. Pete had been on a 3 day bender & was just on his way back to T’s to try & get in touch with one of his mates, who he hoped would save him from himself, but unfortunately for Pete, his saviour couldn’t be reached, so he settled for the next best thing, our company, more drink, oh, & some fried Crickets. With relative ease, Pete persuaded us to join him at a local joint just around the corner, for drinks & a few games of pool. Like a drunken pied piper, Pete led us around in circles, until finally arriving at the bar. The bar was small & busy, mostly full of locals who were either seated around, or stood over the 2 pool tables. Pete wasted no time in introducing us to some of the local mafia & in the same breath advised that we didn’t mess about. Unobvious to Pete was that we weren’t in the game for messing about with mafia bosses, so we let Pete continue with his introductions, & then parked ourselves at the table just in the entrance. Sam & Elaine had some food before calling it a night & headed back to TK’s, whilst the lads & now a very drunk Pete watched the world cup draws before drawing an end to the night, satisfied in the fact that England had an easy group.

The early start had us all wishing that we’d had one less beer the night before, especially with the 4 hour bus ride we had ahead of us to Pai, our next destination.

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Comments

[Melanie]

At last!
Hi there guys,great to have things back on track and you have not disapointed with this blog, I dont like to laugh at peoples mis-fortunes but I new what would happen when you started on about the bikes,as I was reading, in my mind I was saying "no, dont do it!" but you did. More great pictures,and a very entertaining half an hours reading for me as Den and Max are watching the footy. Take care, speak soon, Seatons X X X X X.