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Published: September 18th 2007
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Shanghai Shanghai, the eighth largest city in the world, was recently voted as one of the most exciting by "Time Magazine" and "The Guardian" and we can easily see why. Shanghai today is like Hong Kong was in the 1980s - full of vibrancy and promise.
The two sides of Shanghai face each other across the murky Huangpu River, juxtaposing the past and future. On the west bank is The Bund, a sweeping esplanade of classical buildings, the former headquarters of foreign banks and institutions which sprang up during Shanghai's 1920s heyday. On the east side of the river is the brash face of the new Shanghai - Pudong - with its outlandish skyline of skyscrapers topped with spires, baubles, pyramids and soufflé flourishes. In the shadow of ubiquitous high-rise constructions, you can still stumble across narrow streets of old-style 'lane houses' where washing hangs from balconies and people go about their business in their pyjamas. As you stare in amazement at the phallic Oriental Pearl TV Tower (shaped like a demented concrete Christmas tree designed by a five-year-old boy with ADD), it's hard to believe that just 15 years ago, there was nothing here but fishermen's huts.
Pollution Surprisingly, given that it is an industrial city with more erections than a Ron Jeremy film, we didn’t really feel the effects of the air pollution in Guangzhou. However, the effects were palpable in Shanghai. Breathing became much akin to sucking a banana through a straw.
When we visited the Pearl Orient TV Tower, it was only when we stopped to take a picture that we realised we were sitting in front of the first flowers we had seen in China for more than two weeks.
The air and light pollution is so pronounced that the night sky is quite starless (which will make China’s space travel aspirations very challenging). The moon can be seen, but unlike the Melbourne moon, which is a shimmery silver with a clear and crisp definition, its Shanghai counterpart is a murky brownish colour, not unlike an underwear smear (only not as attractive). A clear moon can be seen so rarely in Shanghai that an infrequent occurrence is referred to as happening “once in a clear Chinese moon” (or “time for Caroline to have a shower moon”).
Traffic Traffic laws in Shanghai are not so much regulations as purely
suggestive guidelines. In actuality, the right-of-way is determined strictly by size. Trucks and buses are at the top of the vehicular food chain, followed by vans, cars, motor scooters, bicycles, and - very finally - pedestrians. Unlike in Australia, the auburn light does not indicate caution so much as a signal to give taxi drivers a running start at pedestrians and cyclists.
Shanghai is one of several major cities in China which have local ordinances absolving a driver from all responsibility for hitting a pedestrian if the pedestrian is violating a traffic law (e.g. not crossing at a designated walkway). Surprisingly, you see very few dents on Shanghai taxicabs (the same cannot be said for the pedestrians).
Construction Since the implementation of its reform policies, the Chinese Government has achieved remarkable progress in infrastructure construction. One power station is constructed somewhere in China every week. Four hundred high-rise commercial buildings are built just in Shanghai every year. The Chinese consume 54.7%!o(MISSING)f the concrete and 36.1%!o(MISSING)f the steel produced in the world. A visit to numerous construction sites around the city is as close as you get in the 21st century to seeing what it must
have been like to construct the Great Wall of China. They operate 24 hours a day (where is Norm Gallagher when you need him?).
In addition, the Chinese display an openness to audacious projects, which can be attributed to their lack of timidity and inhibition. Everyone is encouraged to propose their most extravagant designs, as the line between good taste and bad taste is far less substantial in China. Take a look at the Beijing Olympic stadium…
Chinglish names Some of the names of people we've met have been gorgeous.
Many Chinese people have their English names suggested to them by their English teachers, however, these teachers have never travelled outside China or had much interaction with native speakers, and this is the source of some of the oddest names, such as Snowball, Echo, Yo Yo, Charity Bin, Celery, Stormy, Nightingale, Windy and Magic Wang (maybe a “Harry Potter” fan?).
English Signs in China I couldn’t complete the blog without including a section on Chinglish signs. While Katrena, Nicky and I saw heaps, we rarely had the opportunity to photograph them, so I’ve attached some beauties from www.Engrish.com
Here are a few
snippets about us.
The Return of Zorba Maya is determined to make every meal go off with a bang. The litany of broken crockery that she leaves in her wake is legendary, from ceramic spoons to soup tureens. She’s clearly testing their physical properties to determine the point of breakage. Does nothing escape her analytical eye?
Free babysitting One thing I’ll really miss is the legions of women (and not a few men) who willingly babysat Maya at any time. When I say “willingly”, I don’t mean to imply that they graciously offered to take care of Maya for a few minutes. It was more like Maya was forcibly removed from my arms and I lost her for hours at a time while she was volubly adored by various throngs. In one instance, I almost had to run for a police officer to ensure Maya was returned.
Level 1 - Ladies’ Lingerie Nicky and I enjoyed two interesting experiences in a lingerie shop the other day:
(i) Nicky was brassiere browsing, as is her wont, and she held one up to her chest to see if the colour suited her. This caused an
older sales lady to come hurtling towards her faster than Abbott on the Papal ring. She pointed to the bra, shook her head vigorously and proceeded to latch her hands onto Nicky’s breasts like suction cups. She squeezed, tilted her head and then selected the same bra in a larger size. Needless to say, the bra fitted perfectly. 4M (measurement by manual mammary manipulation) has a lot going for it, not least of which is its popularity with both genders.
(ii) The second experience is more an answer to a riddle. What is the one thing Nicky and Caroline will never, ever have to purchase in their respective lifetimes? Check the photos for a clue.
Weeeee’re back!! Oh, by the way, we’re back! The Hotmail and travelblog websites were blocked in Shanghai (most likely due to Government censorship), so I wasn’t able to blog or respond to e-mail messages. Maya and I didn't sleep on the flight home, although we did contract tonsillitis, so we were both exhaustipated when we arrived home. We've just been sleeping almost non-stop ever since. This is Maya’s first sleep without me, so I have the chance to blog for a few
precious minutes. (Housework? What housework?) We can’t wait to see everyone when we’re finally up and running.
And before you ask, I'll shamelessly plagiarise John, Katrena's beloved: I’m about four times as happy as Mr Happy.
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Katrena
non-member comment
Does this mean no more blogs?
I know my family will be very dissapointed if this is the last blog and we are all of the opinion you must do some writing while you are on leave with Maya and get a book out of it becuase we have loved reading the blogs so much.