French lessons

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iPod use #23: Light your way through a Paris apartment corridor by turning on your iPod screen.

It seems hallways and stairwells in the apartment buildings I've been in so far stay completely dark until you hit one of the many switches that turn on the flourescent lights throughout the building. It was a little annoying at first and I almost cracked my head open going down some stairs where the light refused to turn on, but I appreciate and admire the conservation effort so much that I'm living with it. Besides, in a pinch, I have my wonderful iPod to help me out.

I've been in Paris three whole days now. And I'm beginning to realize something... there are hardly any fat women here. It's like the fat gene has been selected out of the French gene pool and supplemented with some enzyme that efficiently metabolizes cheese, butter and wine. Even the immigrant population is thin! At immigration I imagine them saying, "I'm sorry your ass is more than .5 meters wide, you can't enter the country" or "We will have to detain you in quarantine until you weigh less than 75kg". The fact of the matter is, the men and the women look damn good despite all the bars and eateries and boulangeries and patisseries! And hence, there's a lot of kissing and hugging going on. Lots of groping in public. I saw a couple sucking face sitting on a park bench near Rue St. Germaine and I almost wanted to yell, "Hey, grandma, grandpa! Get a room will ya?!!!" Choukri has convinced me that Parisian tap water is very safe to drink and good. I'm bottling some of this stuff... "there must be something in the water" as it's been said.

In London, I almost got run over by cars 8 times. If I were a cat, that would have even been too close for comfort. I just couldn't get used to the cars coming from the right instead of the left, even with the reminders on the ground that said, "Look left" or "Look right". In Paris, if I get hit by a car, it won't be because I didn't see the car coming. It will be because they don't give a rats ass about pedestrians. I was crossing the Place de la Concorde to get to the Champs-Elysees last night, crossing when the little green man on the traffic light said I could, and I saw fast cars coming from my right. I thought, "This is it! I'm going to die in Paris on the road to Champs-Elysees. I'm going to die!" They were going that fast! They stopped just in time and ended up backing up from the light. Choukri warned me about Parisian drivers the first day I was here. He saved my life at least three times. "Attention! They don't stop here!" Parisians drive like they are keeping score on how many people they can hit in one day and here is no exception here to the type of driver who runs red lights. Man, woman, grandma... doesn't matter. I wonder how many points to hit an American tourist?

I visited inside Notre Dame the day before and the Sacre Coeur yesterday. Props out to the Catholic churches! They're one of the only places you don't have to pay an admission charge to in some cities. I did make my usual three votive candle donation though. The Sacre Coeur is so beautiful. It sits high on this hill and you get one of the best views of Paris from it. And just a few blocks down from the Sacre Coeur is the Moulin Rouge and the redlight district... neon lit parlors and venues and the Musee de l'Erotisme. I saw a tourist family staring at a window full of miniature figurines in various sexual positions. I wanted to take a picture of the display but they were in the way. Damn tourists. So many photo-ops ruined by damn tourists. (hehehehe)

I took the extra long way to the Champs. That's a euphemistic statement for "I was completely lost." I know the 8th district really well now. Not to mention dsitricts 1-4 and 9 and 10. But I feel really safe here even at night. Thank goodness for the map Choukri gave me from the phone book. Best portable map ever. The one I bought in the U.S., pop-out map, really doesn't have enough detail. Paris is a confusing maze of streets. Get a good map to Paris if you come. Also a compass. I usually have a great sense of direction. But not in Paris. Trust me on this one.

Did I mention that I used to hate the French? Ok, I just didn't understand them until now. Which is one of the main reasons for this trip actually... to break down some of my preconceptions. The people in Choukri's building and neighborhood are very polite and kind. They even make an effort to speak english when I look at them blankly and realize I don't understand them after I say "I'm sorry I don't understand French." And they seem to appreciate my weak attempts at French as well. So perhaps, it's just in the touristy areas where you get the rude French people who have to put up with obnoxious Americans all day. The French are very proud of their culture. They think America is a country with no history or at least a very very young country. In Paris, you are reminded of the city's history everyday. The names of streets are famous people in Parisian history. You know the year they were born and died and why they were important. Buildings and plazas have plaques describing their importance in history. It's a far cry from 'Petco' Park or 'Qualcomm' Stadium. I asked Sophie the other day if the French really hated Americans. To which she responded, "There are French people who hate French people." They just don't understand our government and how there can be people so rich and people so poor in America. And the fact that we pay into social security but it sucks. But it's the same all around the world really. There was a huge fire in the south-east of Paris late last night. Poor immigrant families living in rat-infested dilapidated buildings have been hit twice with huge fires. Same all around the world...

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Comments

[DT]

Ahhh, Paris
I loved Paris too. And I miss you. Where are you? What are you doing? No word in almost a month? Hope you are all right. Where's my postcard?