New Zealand - One Big Adrenalin Rush!

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New Zealand didn’t start off the best way, I managed to take the longest possible route to get there from Aus. I flew from Melbourne to Brisbane, where I had to wait 12 hours in the airport for a flight to Christchurch and then from there another flight down to Queenstown - what could have been a 2hour direct flight took me 2 days, 3 flights and through 4 airports - all thanks to Qantas who messed up my tickets. Qantas said it was my fault for not checking the ticket but I politely explained to them that I did not check my ticket because their overly friendly and camp assistant had asked if ‘I usually prefer the window or aisle seat?’ and I thought this was gay air steward slang for if I give or receive so I just panicked, grabbed my tickets and left before I had the chance to find out what he meant or check the bloody tickets. It didn’t help!

Anyway the two day trip was all worthwhile when I finally landed in Queenstown, it was like stepping off the plane and into a postcard! Queenstown is a small town on Lake Wakatipu, surrounded by snow peaked mountains. I’m not sure but as far I can remember it was the first time I have ever seen mountains and I instantly knew I was going to love Queenstown. I was right! I really can’t emphasise how beautiful Queenstown is. As well as being beautiful and picturesque, Queenstown is the most adrenalin packed place in the world! Every possible extreme sport you can think of, and many you couldn’t even imagine, take place in Queenstown. As the cash is very tight these days I couldn’t afford to try them all so I had to pick a couple; I went for the Luge and the Canyon Swing.

The Luge is very similar to the one in the Winter Olympics, you basically sit in a tea-tray and hurtle down a course that snakes its way down the side of a mountain. The only difference being there was no snow so the tea-tray was on 3-wheels. I can honestly say I have never had so much fun with a tea-tray, I ended up paying to go down 5 times. I was flying down the mountain while taking corners at neck breaking speeds, the Japanese tourists (and there are lots in Queenstown) couldn’t snap fast enough to catch me on film, I was the tea-tray Luge version of Michael Schumacher - well it felt like I was!

The Canyon was a different story, I was shitting myself (sorry but it is the only way to describe it!). The Canyon Swing is like a bungee jump but after dropping 60 metres into a Canyon, you don’t bounce back, you swing at 100 mph along the face of the Canyon. It was a lot scarier than the sky dive I did in Aus, mainly because with the sky dive the man who ties the ropes jumps is with you so there is more of an incentive to do it right! Also with the Canyon Swing you have to physically jump off the edge yourself - believe me that is not easy. It was at this moment that I discovered that the Kiwi’s have the best, but sickest sense of humour! I’m standing right on the edge of the platform looking down at the drop to the river below and the two Kiwi blokes attach me to everything and say when ever your ready just jump. So I eventually just think f@#k it and jump…at this point they both shout ‘no no’, ‘wait it’s not attached’ but its too late! I then spend the freefall honestly thinking that I’m not attached and begin to except the fact that I’m just going to hit the bottom and it’s game over…then bang the rope kicks in, I begin to swing and all I can hear in the distance is the two Kiwi’s wetting themselves - sick bastards!! But I have to applaud them it was a cracking joke, I would be proud of that one.

I decided that was enough extreme sports for now so I headed north to Franz Josef to climb a glacier. I’m not normally a fan of the journeys between places because we have done some really bad ones while traveling - 26 hours on a train in China, 2 days on a boat in Vietnam and a few 12 hour bus journeys in Aus - but the journey from Queenstown to Franz Josef was spectacular. The bus left the beautiful Queenstown and Lake Wakatipu and headed into the Harris Mountain range, then along the length of Lake Wanaka and Lake Hawea. It continued along the mountain ranges into Mount Aspiring National Park, also known as the Southern Alps, where we joined the Haast River at its source and followed it from a stream down side of the mountains to its mouth, 800 metres across, at the Tasman Sea. We followed the Tasman Sea coastline until we reached Mount Cook and headed to the Franz Josef Glacier. It was all absolutely stunning.

Franz Josef Glacier is 11 kilometres long and can be up to 400 metres deep and it is constantly moving down hill at about a metre each day. While in Franz Josef I went ice climbing on the glacier, which involved picking our way half way up the glacier, across to the other side and back down again. It sounds very simple but as the glacier is constantly changing, there is no set path up the glacier. This means you rely on a guide to find a route up the ice, my guide was ‘Fit Nikki 2’ (Fit Nikki 1 is a nurse who works for my Mum) and she did a great job of cutting a path for us with her pickaxe - all while wearing a skimpy pair of shorts! Beautiful! I expected the glacier to be flat but I couldn’t have been more wrong, the climbing turned out to be very hard work. At times we were avoiding falling ice, walking along ledges, avoiding drops down ravens, climbing steep ice sheets, and sometimes we had to slide through gaps so narrow that you couldn’t even walk with your feet side by side so I was literally cuddling the ice. It was all well worth it. Around each corner the ice created new, amazing views, the best being a huge ice cave that appeared out of nowhere. I never would have imagined that I would ever get the chance to walk on a glacier, especially not on this trip, and I’m so lucky that I got the chance.

The next stop, again by bus journey with amazing views, was Christchurch. On route the bus stopped in Greymouth where I went to the driving range to pass the time and discovered in New Zealand they do them very different…instead of just distance markers and flags to aim at, they have TVs and old cars. I can’t think of a better way to get rid of stress than hitting golf balls at old Beetles. While in Christchurch I went to the International Antarctic Centre where they show you what life is like on Antarctica. Before I went there I believed that Antarctica would be freezing cold and very windy…now I know that Antarctica is freezing cold and very windy! Worth every penny to confirm that fact. To prove this to me they put us in a room and simulate Antarctic conditions so it gets darker then the wind howls around you and the temperature drops to about -25°c and I thought to myself - ‘Isn’t it cold in the Antarctic’ - it was rubbish, but they did have a penguin called Pingu.

Next I headed further up the east coast to Kaikora which is famous for its abundance of large mammals off the coast, Whales, Dolphins and Seals can be seen all year round. Whale watching was fully booked so I didn’t do that. I went on a bike ride to see Kaikoras seal colony and only found one, which was either asleep or dead not sure but it didn’t move once. I haven’t read my dictionary in a while but as far as I can remember one seal does not constitute a colony, especially if it’s dead! I did have more success with the dolphins…We headed out to Sea at about 5.30am and watched a stunning sunrise over the Pacific Ocean. Then suddenly all around the boat were fins and jumping dolphins, so we just jumped in. We ended up swimming with a pod of about 400 Dusky Dolphins, it was amazing to be able to play with wild dolphins but 400 of them was unbelievable. They told us beforehand that “the dolphins are not there to entertain you, you are there to entertain them” and they weren’t lying, if you didn’t keep them entertained they would swim away so we had to play games with them. My favourite way to keep them occupied was what I call the eye contact game. This is were you get eye contact with a dolphin as it swims near you and they will stay with you as long as you keep eye contact - sounds easy!? But the dolphin were swimming in a circle around me so I had to keep turning in the water, and they get faster and faster until they are too quick and I lost eye contact so they swam off. I ended up swimming round and round in circles, with different dolphins, for an hour. It was great and they are such amazing creatures!

After my Dolphin encounter I headed up to the North Island and briefly stopped in the Capital of New Zealand, Wellington. It was a bit of a dull city as there was nothing much to do, but I did meet a great bloke called Yarets. Yarets is a deaf mute Russian (so obviously we had a lot to talk about??) who has been traveling the world on a motorbike for 7 years and has a Guinness World Record - check out his website www.yarets.com - despite the problem with communication he was a really interesting bloke. It does however say a lot for Wellington, when the highlight was talking to a deaf mute!

My next stop in the North Island was Rotorua which I can best describe as Geologist Pornography (which I like to call Geo-ography!). Apparently there is volcanic activity under Rotorua which makes steam rise from the ground all over the city - it is a really amazing site. There is one major problem with all the steam, it contains sulphur...which smells like rotten eggs, so at random points throughout the first day I would uncontrollably gag - even worse with a hangover! Anyway I was just wondering round Rotorua and who should I bump into, none other than the Jackson 2 (also known as Ad and Rick) and Tommo, heading South after Fiji. We were later joined by Rob and Tash (his girlfriend visiting for a month) and then by an amazing coincidence my old flat mate from Uni - Richie Rich and his mate Paul were in Rotorua as well, so I went from being on my Tod to 8 of us from Nottingham. They had another Luge track in Rotorua so the first thing I had to do was introduce the boys to flying down a mountain on a tea-tray so me, Ad, Rick and Tomo went off and hurtled down the mountain at even faster speeds than in Queenstown. We also decided to try something I had never even heard of before…Zorbing! Basically it is an inflatable hamster’s ball and two people get inside it and try and run down a hill. That would be too straight forward for the Kiwi’s so they pump a load of water in with you so you end up falling down the hill in a giant washing machine. I couldn’t stop laughing all the way down, except when I was face down in the water - only a Kiwi could think up Zorbing!! To celebrate us all being reunited in New Zealand for one night only we went out for a few beers and then had a few more and my night ended with me searching the streets of Rotorua for my hostel for 2 hours - sign of a very good night. The next night it was just me Rich and Paul left so we decided to get drunk in the hot tub at their campsite and, again, I was too drunk to find home so the 3 of us slept in their tent, not very pretty sight in the morning.

I also went to a traditional Maori show where they performed Maori dances and cooked Maori food. When it came to doing, the infamous, ‘Haka’ they picked 4 people from the audience to perform with them. And I got picked by a big Maori monster so I wasn’t going to argue, seriously look at the picture, this guy is not human! He is massive! Normally I would hate being chosen but the music takes over (and the wine) and I couldn’t help jumping around, sticking my tongue out and pretending I knew the words. I actually ended up with bruises on my thighs from slapping them so hard, so I am now an honorary All Black. I finished my time in Rotorua with another New Zealand tradition - White Water Rafting. I dived straight in at the deep end and went for the Kaitana River which has grade 5 rapids - if you don’t know grade 1 is a little stream, and grade 5 is a raging river! We paddled our way down the rapids, with the guide shouting out things like ‘hard left’ and ‘hard right’; I couldn’t remember what they meant so I just kept paddling the whole time. I did remember what he meant when he shouted ‘paddles in, get down’ that meant we were going over a waterfall so hide in the boat. The biggest waterfall we went over was 7 meters which is very big! The whole raft and 6 crew disappeared under water when we landed and there was that much water that I wasn't sure if I was still in the raft or in the river, but eventually I worked out which way was up and realized we were still floating and we carried on. It was a lot of fun but a lot easier than I thought it would be, I had visions of paddling for my life but that never happened but can't complain.

After leaving Rich and Paul behind I headed further North to the Bay of Islands. I did a few dives on Poor Knights Island off Tutukaka which is meant to be ‘the best sub-tropical diving in the world’. Which I would agree with but I didn’t realize sub-tropical is a nice way of saying bloody freezing! It did have an amazing underwater cave that is like a mosaic of different coloured Algae, very beautiful. I also stayed in Paihia which is a really nice and relaxed place with lots of picturesque beaches. I went on a trip to the Northern most point of New Zealand, Cape Reinga which is an impressive sight because it is where the Tasman Sea meets the Pacific Ocean. You can actually see where the two different coloured waters meet in huge crashing waves heading out to sea. Then I headed back along 90 mile Beach, which is only 64 miles long and they just guessed when they named it!? But the best part of the trip, and the reason I went, was because we got to do ‘Sand Dune Boogie Boarding’ which is just flying down a sand dune at 100mph on a body board - lots of fun! But what is even more fun is watching people crash on the way down and ending up with a mouthful of sand (it was along day)!?

My final stop in New Zealand was Auckland which is a lovely city but much like any other city, full of skyscrapers and McDonalds. There was only one way that I could end my time in New Zealand…go to the top of the tallest building in the Southern Hemisphere and do the highest jump in the world! No parachute and no bungee cord and I wasn’t suicidal! It was a sort of Base jump off the top and I fell nearly 200 metres in 20 seconds to the street below, where two cables slowed me down just enough so that I didn’t end up a smudge on the pavement…that is New Zealand!!

I am going to be very sad to leave New Zealand, it currently sits top of my favourite countries and it will be hard to beat (although I have said that about everywhere but I mean it this time!). I have managed to visit 9 places in a month which is good going but not even close to what New Zealand has to offer. That means one thing...I will have to come back! I've actually been offered a job so I may put off the real world and come back next year?? I will see what happens but I really have enjoyed it that much! Kiwis are the nicest and craziest people I have ever met, New Zealand is so beautiful and there is so much to do here (must of it involves jumping off something). I even love the politics in New Zealand - I have heard this a few times so it must be true - the result of their General Election is usually based on how the All Blacks do in the Rugby World Cup, so when England won the last one it cost the Prime Minister his job! That's so much easier than having election campaigns! Although in England nobody would ever do more than one term. See, what is there not to love about New Zealand!?!? I will definitely be back.

Next up is a flight back in time to South America. Starting in Chile and heading across from the West to the East coast.

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Photos

Here today...
Canyon Swing, Queenstown

...gone tomorrow!!!
Canyon Swing, Queenstown

Fit Nikki on the glacier
see what I mean about a beautiful women yeilding an axe

Now you see us...
Going over the 7 meter waterfall

...now you don't
The whole raft ended up under water!

Poor Knights Island
These are the caves I dived in

!@#$%!!!
That's all that needs saying here!
Sunrise over the Pacific Ocean

Dusky Dolphin...
...too quick for me

Concentration!!
or is it fear??

Comments

[Zorbster]

Not funny
Interesting blog but can you hold back on the unfunny homophobic comments please?