Machu Picchu and Cusco

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CUSCO/CUZCO

We may not know which was the right way to spell it but we were headed that way. After our rather depressing return to Puno we headed for the most touristed region in Peru. We read that 90%!o(MISSING)f all tourists to Peru go to see Machu Picchu, and two million tourists a year go to Peru. What is that? 4,000 people a day? We were ready to embrace the horde!
The guy at our hotel in Puno asked if we would like to buy the bus tickets to Cusco from him for 25 soles each (around $8). We were pretty beat from being thrown out of Bolivia so we said sure. It turns out that he bought the tickets for 13 soles. That is quite a mark up! Oh well, live and learn. The bus was a bus for locals so there were only a few tourists on it. Also like most long-haul buses it had 2 floors. Our seats were on the top floor. When we boarded we saw a few Peruvian women going back and forth caring boxes on the bus. The boxes were full of household goods—dishes, pots, toasters, etc. By the time they finished loading everything the back of the bus looked like the Peruvian version of Bed, Bath & Beyond. Another quirky thing was a family brought their dog with them. Are we the only ones that think bringing a dog on a 9 hour bus trip is a bad idea? Turns out that the the dog was better behaved than some of the passengers...go figure. All he did was sleep the whole trip under the family's bus seat.
Just outside of Cusco there was a Police stop. Now in Peru, police are EVERYWHERE but this was unusual. Sure it was normal to see police directing traffic or in a parade but we had never seen a police stop on the roads. They where stopping all the cars and checking all the buses. They obviously weren't interested in the tourists but they pulled off a woman from the housewares department on the back of the bus. They apparently didn't like something she had in the cargo compartment of the bus and confiscated it. She seemed rather unperturbed. We later learned found out what the police were looking for. The locally grown leftist terrorist organization called Shining Path had planted a bomb on a police convoy killing about 20 people. This was the first attack they have perpetrated in over a decade. We noticed an increase in the already formidable police presence. All that and not a single person had to take off their shoes. Eat your heart out Homeland Security. I thought it was interesting that Shining Path was not started by a religious nut or militant wacko, but by a philosophy teacher.
The scenery was nice as we neared Cuzco. Most of southern Peru is desert but the area around Cusco is near the jungle. It was great to see green for a change. There was a couple of little girls on the bus we made friends with. We started by playing hide and seek behind the bus seats but after we gave them some cookies the shyness disappeared. Emboldened by the sugar, the girls realized we would make the perfect English tutors, so the rest of the way to Cusco they would ask us words in Spanish and then laugh hysterically when we would tell them the word in English. The whole bus joined in, sometimes asking words in Spanish and sometimes sharing what they knew in English. It turned out to be a great way to pass the time and a lot more fun than the $30 tourist bus would have been!
About an hour outside of Cusco it started to rain. We had almost forgotten what it looked like! We had seen plenty of clouds and fog but this was the first time we had actually seen rain. It may have been the first time for the bus driver too because shortly after it started to rain he made a nearly catastrophic driving mistake. He took a turn to quickly and the bus reared up on two wheels. The two little girls went flying into my lap. The dog seemed uninterested as he slid across the isle back and forth. It didn't even raise its head Thankfully the driver was able to correct before sending a bus full of people plummeting off the side of a 300 ft cliff. The passengers weren't too forgiving—stomping on the floor and insulting the driver's intelligence and mama. But that is also how they ask him to let them off at their stop, so what do we know. Despite all that, we arrived safely in a very rainy Cusco.
The plan was to send a couple days in Cusco to orient ourselves and do some chores and then head off to Machu Picchu. First, let us say that Cusco is a beautiful city. Sadly it is a victim of its own popularity. The problem with going to where all the tourist go is that it is where all the tourist are and the locals act accordingly. Everywhere you walk people jump in front of you trying to get you to buy something. “Hey miss you want a massage-manicure-pedicure?” “You should buy a hat! Only 10 sole.” “Friends you hungry. Try my restaurant.” “Hey mister you want some weed?” NO, NO, NO and HELL NO! There must be a massage therapist school in Cusco cause every 5 minutes someone asks if we want a massage. In fact we plan to make our first million by selling shirts with a chihuahua on them that say, “¡No quiero masaje!” The beautiful thing is Taco Bell can't sue! There are three concepts that have no meaning in Peru, copyright protections, right of way, and I was in line first.
One thing Kevin wanted to see in Cusco was the famous 12-sided stone. You see before it was the vortex of all Peruvian tourism, Cusco was the capital of Inca civilization. Many of the buildings here still have their hefty hewn-stone foundations. In one of these foundations is a stone with 12 corners. After we found it, Kevin asked me to stand in front of it so he could take a picture. I leaned against the wall and a huge outcry arose from bystanders nearby. Apparently a while back someone tried to graffiti the scared stone so from then on no one is allowed to touch it. ¡Disculpe! A nice man stepped forward to explain this and point out all the security cameras. We've seen fewer security cameras at a casino in Vegas. He went on to tell us a little history about the stone. He also showed us a wall that was built by the Incas with huge stones, weighing at least a ton each, and a wall right next to it built by the Spaniards with smaller stones. “This is where the Spaniards thought the Incas were hiding gold, so they tore down this wall and, after discovering no gold, built it back up. We say this wall was built by the Incas and this wall was by the Incapables!” He laughed expecting us to laugh along with him. I felt like saying: 'Yeah, I saw the Motorcycle Diaries too. Good Movie.'
He told us he had some postcards for sell of pictures embedded in the wall that can only be seen during certain times of year. We thought they were pretty neat so we offered to buy some, he seemed like a nice guy after all. He told us he want to show us were they are taken. Sure. He told us some more information and then pulled out his postcards and asked which ones we would like. I found 3 nice ones and asked how much. He said, “20 soles for the postcards and the information.” I felt like Lauren Bacall in To Have and Have Not when I thought to myself “Have you ever been bit by a dead bee?” (If you have never seen this movie you need to go out—after you finish reading the blog of course—and rent this movie. It is a classic). So we had a choice, make a scene in the middle of the street or hand it over. We gave him the 20 soles but looking back I wish I had made a scene. I'm pretty sure that is what Lauren would have done. On the bright side I'm posting the pictures. No copyright remember? Take that postcard dude!

Aguas Calientes

So chores done and 20 soles lighter, we headed off to Machu Picchu. We had a few options on how we could do this. First there is the Inca Trail but we would have had to reserve months in advance and paid $400 dollars each. We talked to a few survivors of this ordeal and decided to take a pass. We'll leave the 10 hour forced marches through the jungle for John McCain's political advertisements. And for those that didn't like the previous statement: Yes we really said it...get over it. Option #2, take a train straight from Cusco to the nearest town to Machu Picchu, Aguas Calientes. Bear in mind this is a tourist train and therefore costs $80 dollars a person for a second-class seat. So with our usual budget-minded fervor we opted for the third choice: Take a bus from Cusco to Urubamba—7 soles, Take a taxi from Urubamba to Ollantaytambo—4 soles, Take the train from Ollantaytambo to Aguas Calientes—102 soles, Saving $42 a person by taking the most circuitous route through towns you can't even begin to pronounce—Priceless.
On the train to Aguas Calientes, we met some really nice guys who had an even bigger ax to grind with Bolivia. The four of them were working in the Peace Corps in Bolivia when all the craziness went down. When all the Americans got booted out of the country they were forced to leave, proving once again that no good deed goes unpunished. So choosing to take lemons and make lemonade they decided to tool around South America for a while. We ended up all staying in the same hotel as them in Aguas Calientes.
The train to Aguas Calientes is super scenic, traveling through lush jungle valleys with a twisting river and snow-capped mountains high above. It was interesting to notice the desert change to rain forest in the span of about 2 minutes. Even though the landscape was nothing more than a blur at times I was able to notice several amazing floral and fauna that I'd never seen before, including during my insomniac National Geographic sessions.
Because Machu Picchu is a tourist mecca, the closer you get to it more people harass you to buy crap. Sadly Aguas Calientes is an amazing place, surrounded by jungled covered mountains with a beautiful river flowing through it and all you can think about is punching the next guy who asks you to come into his restaurant. That's what we get for following the horde. On the plus side it is off season so we got to practice our bargaining skills. It's amazing how fast a hotel room goes from 50 soles to 30 soles as soon as you say you are not interested! We took it (30 soles is $10). To Kevin's dismay Aguas Calientes (lit. Hot Waters) failed to live up to the name. He got to shiver his way through a cold shower. We went out to buy our tickets for Machu Picchu and grab some dinner. When we got back we realized we were bleeding from everywhere! Apparently the aggressive restaurateurs aren't the only frustrating species inhabiting Aguas Calientes. It must also be home to the world's most ferocious species of mosquito. Well others of its breed are content to just take the blood, these ones take whole chunks of skin with it! It was all becoming clear now. We had seen throughout the course of our travels in Peru, tourists with horrible bites all over their bodies and now we finally discovered where they got them. Now every time we see someone with Aguas Calientes pox we ask ”How did you like Machu Picchu?”
So we hadn't been burned by our Lonely Planet Guidebook in almost a week so we figured we were due. We read that in order to get to Machu Picchu before the crowds, it's best to take the first bus up at 5:30 am. We got up at 4 am and made our way to the bus stop and it turned out to be very easy to find, it had 600 people in front of it. NOTE TO SELF: read whatever it says in the guidebook and do the opposite, then find the guy who wrote the guidebook and beat him upside the head with it.

Machu Picchu. La Ciudad de Piedra (The City of Stone)

Despite the longer than anticipated line we still got to Machu Picchu before sunrise. Once in the park we split off from the pack and decided to go exploring on our own. It really is a pretty amazing place. If you can get away from everyone else its like you are the only people there, discovering it for the first time. Also there was something magical about being there first thing in the morning. The air was cool. The mountains around it were still shrouded in their early morning clouds, hugging the mountain tops like spirits. Machu Picchu is one of those rare places that photography doesn't do justice. I felt like an astronaut in a spacesuit away from the shuttle, and for the first time realizing exactly what the word BIG meant and how small we are in comparison. Maybe the guidebook wasn't entirely wrong—we'll downgrade from a sound trashing to a couple of firm slaps across the face.
Machu Picchu was discovered by an American archaeologist in 1911 with the help of a local boy, and like most great white explorers mistakenly thought he found something else. Time had taken its toll on the site and was so overgrown with vegetation that it was virtually indistinguishable from any other hill top. It's interesting to point out that the majority of tourists pronounce it wrong. The often misquoted Machu Picchu in Quechua means “old penis.” The correct pronunciation is “Mahck-chu Peak-chu.” The interesting thing about the mountains surrounding Machu Picchu is that if you look at them from a certain point of view and at a certain time of day they form a face. Maybe that's why the Incas settled here, to be in the presence of their gods. It's also interesting to note that scientists have discovered that because of the number of tourists on the hill top every day, Machu Picchu is sinking at the rate of a centimeter a month. So maybe one day there will be too much moisture in the soil and the whole site along with whatever tourists are on top will slide down the hill in one big avalanche.
Marion, the friend we had met in Puno, suggested we hike up Whuaynapicchu, the highest of the mountains and the nose of the “face.” The admission to the trail is included in the entry ticket but the amount of people they let in is limited. Only 200 people at 7 am and another 200 people at 10 am. From the second we got into the park we had seen people racing to get in line. We decided we wanted to see the park first and if we miss out so be it. We saw what we wanted to see and headed over to the line. We asked the guy handing out numbers what number we were and he said 138-139. Well, I guess there was no need to hurry. We read the sign at the front gate. “1. This is a strenuous hike. 2 This hike is only for the fit and health. 3. This hike is ALL uphill. 4. If you die attempting this hike you will not be offered any assistance and/or a refund.” Ok I added the last one but I think you get the general gist. Well we thought it sounded like fun at least. Only one problem. The guidebook and the signs at the office in Aguas Calientes where we bought the tickets said we couldn't bring water into Machu Picchu and being the good law abiding citizens we are, we obeyed. All we brought was a small bottle for the bus ride up that we fully expected to throw away at the gate. Low and behold no one at the gate cared about our contraband water bottle and apparently we were the only ones that even listened to the rules. NOTE TO SELF: Stop stupidly following rules and shove the guidebook up the author's @%&*. So now we had to climb a mountain with 2 sips of water. Crap. Well not being overly endowed with common sense we were undetoured. It turned out that the sign sugarcoated it. The hike was so steep they had to put cables beside the stairs for people to literally pull themselves up with and on the way down them, the stairs would actually hit our backpack as we walked down them, But the we made it to the top. Though the whole time I could imagine the following disclaimer “The makers of this prosthesis do not encourage or endorse engaging in this activity and take no responsibility for negative consequences that can inevitably result from doing so. This crazy chic does weird stuff like this all the time and seems to get away with it but your experience may vary.” As for our water problem, I admit I guzzle water like G. W. Bush did beer at Yale. Yup...I did it again...so there. So in addition to spending the entire hike keeping me from having a permanent Inca stair scar on my forehead, Kevin also saved all the water we had for me. Thankfully people along the way, seeing we didn't have enough water gave us what they could including the guys from the Peace Corps. The view from the top was amazing. Well worth the 4 days it took for every muscle in body to stop screaming in agony every time I moved. Though Kev did admit that once my parents read the blog they may not think he is an adequate chaperon for me anymore. No worries, Ma, he did draw the line at sliding down a steep rock on the side of the cliff to get to some ruins I wanted to see. Although that didn't stop him from doing a hand-stand at the edge of a cliff just for a photo-op.
Once we got to Aguas Calientes, all hell broke loose on my thirst. I finished two bottles of water at the restaurant where we and lunch and Kevin had to leave to get me two more before we finished eating. We ate like sailors on shore leave and sat at the restaurant table with our shoes off. Everyone left but we never understood why.
Thanks for reading. We're planning on staying a week in Cusco to take some Spanish classes then we'll head down to Chile (to go around stupid Bolivia) and into Argentina.
Chao!

***TRAVELERS' TIPS***

-DO bring a water bottle to Machu Picchu. They say not to but they don't care when you get there. They do care about food though.

-Through the north side of the plaza is a small alley with a small Mexican restaurant with the best Chimichangas I've ever had.

-Continue through the alleyway, turn left, then right to come to a small Spanish language school that only charges $90/week.

-DO bring bug spray to Aguas Calientes

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Photos

Ammi and another baby sheep
I had sheep on my fleece for 5 days!

Parade celebrating losing the war against Chile
Go figure

Train to Aguas Calientes
I couldn´t read or anything else, just stare at the scenery

Incan Dude
I think they put this here to scare away the tourists. Not working very well though

Some local insects
That spider is about a foot long

The line into Machu Picchu
Boy, I´m glad we got up at five to be the first ones in!

Machu Picchu
You can kind of see ¨the Face.¨ The nose in the middle, chin and lips on the left, and forehead on the right. We hiked ¨The Nose.¨

Comments

[Sydney]

Lines and rules only exist in the US
Hey Guys, I'm so glad you are keeping this blog. You are doing so much that you will not remember all the little funny details when it is over and when people ask you, two years from now, how your trip was, you'll just be like "it was great!" As for no one standing in line, that seems to be an international thing. I am glad that it is not just Israelis. The Israelis, however, to their credit, have perfected the line cutting game. They creep stealthily forward, insert a foot or some other innocuous part of the body, shuffle a little so that the foot become a leg, then a leg and a butt cheek, and eventually, viola, you have just lost your place in line. I have become very good at fending of the professional line cutters. They are usually old, well weathered women and therefore pretty easy to spot. I think it's something socialogical, like they are standing in the bread line in the shtetl in Vilna and if they don't get in front of you, their twelve children will starve. I was at the grocery store the other day and an old, rather man-ish looking woman tried to cut me in line. When it was obvious that I wan't going to let her in, she proceeded to press her old lady breasts against my shoulder blades and follow me through the whole line in this manner. Oy Vey!!! As for rules, many languages don't even have a word for "rule", so just do whatever you want and act totally ignorant if you get caught. Fuck the guide book. Obama 2008!!! Yeah, bitches! I love you guys! --Syd