the wedding and chocolate!

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ok, ok, i won't keep you waiting any longer. here's another blog. 😊 - b

january 21, 2009

we're continuing to celebrate christmas here as christmas packages and mail are arriving in bursts when the plane lands. lately we've been spoiled by an assortment of traditional german christmas goodies, vacuum sealed and sent from the brulls. i love reading the christmas letters and feeling like we're still in the loop with everyone.

this past weekend was quite the adventure. funny how just when things seem to fall into place and make sense, we'll be introduced to another facet of life that tweeks our perception. the other volunteer on maewo, sandy, came down for a wedding in betarara. (some of you may be wondering about the fourth volunteer who was also originally on maewo from our group. she ended up terminating her service early and going home. however, we've heard through the coconut wireless that she maybe replaced by another volunteer, so the maewo gang may be back up to four sometime soon. we'll keep you posted). sandy's family came down a day before the wedding to make laplap. that day the road was full of people walking, from the north and from the south, carrying "ras ras" and taro. a ras ras is like a metal cheese grater, but here they make them by removing the top and bottom from a tin can and cutting it up the side. then they use a hammer and nail to punch holes in the tin. the side that has the raw metal edges pushing out is faced to the top ad the tin is nailed to a wooden frame. then roots like taro and marrioc, as well as, cooking bananas are rubbed across the jagged surface. the mush that results is kept for further preparation - like laplap or simboro.

since both the bride and groom were from maewo, (so all the guests were within walking distance), the wedding was big one. both families baked huge laplaps to present each the next day at the bride payment. huge meaning like the size of your dining room table. thursday night, sandy as well as justin's host parents crashed at our house. justin's parents woke up around 4 am to bake yet another laplap. this one was for all the guests after the ceremony.

after they baked, they came back for a few more moments of rest before the sun came up. around 7:30 friday morning we headed to the neighborhood of houses where the bride's family lived. the bride price ceremony was held out in the yard. three stacks of gifts were accumulating: one for the family of the groom, on for the family of the bride, and one for the couple. at the base of each was a laplap, baked and wrapped in banana leaves. the family of the bride's pile also had custom mats and 4 yard pieces of fabric rolled into large bundles. the price for a woman on maewo is 30,000 vatu (about $300) and then mats, a pig, and taro are exchanged between families as well. on efate, the island where we had our pre-service training and is also home to the country's capital, the bride price is 80,000 vatu (about $800). there is more access and probability of someone in the family having a job to be able to pay for a woman, as well as, the woman's family would have access to more stores and taxis and other needs for the money. but on maewo, since vatu is not necessary or usable for life here, the price is significantly lower.

the pile of gifts for the couple included things for their house like a mattress, dishes, pots, and pans. sandy and i wondered if the brides here ever register for their wedding gifts at the chinese shops in vila, selecting their dishes from the varieties of plastic plates with brightly colored designs. for this bride, she was at the mercy of whoever thought to bring a gift and no doubt she was grateful for everything, mismatched or not.

everyone gathered outside, sitting in the shade of their houses or under trees. there were a series of speeches made while the couple sat alongside the gifts. all of this ceremony was conducted in the local language, so many of the details were lost to me, but the men who spoke were the two fathers, a chief, and another elder. the whole time the couple sat there. they, along with everyone else, had a somber aura about them. their eyes gazed ahead and down, not making eye contact with anyone, let alone each other. after the speeches, the women came and portioned out the laplap to the respective families. justin and i received the laplap from both the bride and groom's side. somehow we are related to both (hopefully it's through marriage). we carried our laplap back to the house and then headed to the church for the ceremony.

for the ceremony, people changed from their t-shirts and shorts into island dresses and collared shirts. even though we took our time getting to the church, we were still among the first to arrive. we sat outside and waited for more people to show up. pretyy soon, the bride, grom, three bridesmaids, and three groomsmen showed up in a group. the bride wore an itchy looking white dress, which i think is passed around to whoever is getting married on the island, and heeled sandals with socks. her bridesmaids wore bright orange dresses. the guys had all secured suits, probably the same way the dress is passed around. they gathered outside the church and the post master hollered for everyone to come inside. to my surprise, there was hardly anyone there for the ceremony.

the entire bridal party sat on the front row of the church, all of them standing for the entire ceremony. the vows and message were pretty comparable to those in the states, though it was interesting to hear all of that translated into bislama. the same somber tone accompanied this ceremony as well. i haven't quite figured out why, possibly because all things custom are taken very seriously and this ceremony was considered something akin to that. we filed out of the church and shook hands with the bridal party on the way out the door. the next time i saw the bride (15 minutes later) she had changed from the dress back into a t-shirt and casual skirt.

changed out of their fancy clothes, the couple sat on the church step as people filed passed, laying gifts on a mat at their feet. lucky for them, there were more people there to present them gifts than showed up to witness the ceremony. the gifts were very practical; things like matches and soap. some people (like justin and i caught unaware) just put vatu on the mat. from there the line proceeded to the kitchen where we picked up our individually wrapped banana leaf parcels of food: laplap, rice, and beef! there was cake, but not enough to go around. i'll have to get in good with the cake deliverers next time.

we sat around and ate on the mats in the church yard. as their food started to settle, the men slipped away to get ready for a custom dance. the women and kids (and justin) sat around chatting until we heard the chanting and soft clicking of ankle jewelry approaching. we all ran around to the backside of the church where a clan of men were rhythmically coming up the road. this first group to dance was made up of the men of betarara village. their ages were from my older host brother - about 12 - to maybe fifty something. the custom on maewo is very strong and the men have ten "steps" in their system. my brother just completed his first step within the year, which is killing a pig during a ritual ceremony. the outfits that the men wear are made of specific leaves, the different leaves indicate their rank. just to keep it real, you could also see specks of modern civilization such as sunglasses and crocs peppered in the crowd.

the men progressed to an empty lot and huddled into the middle, much like you would see a football team do before a big game. they paused to regroup and started singing back again, this time running in place to the beat. women joined in; waving their arms and stomping in place. it was positively spectacular on so many levels. the next song's dance lined the men up and thread them through the crowd. now spectators could see up close the different reds, greens, and yellows in the leaves of their skirts. the older men were very focused but the younger let their eyes wander. i made eye contact with my brother ronald's electric gaze and could sense the energy he was working with.

after they left, the men of justin's family's village performed. their style and costumes were comparable, so i'm not sure why they danced in separate groups (maybe for convenience of practicing?). justin's host papa pulled him into the throng of men and just like that he was one of them. no one seemed to mind his white skin or abundance of clothes. not knowing the words to their songs, he assumed the same, serious facial expression as they had and did his best to dance along. sandy and i were just trying to get his picture when two women came and pulled us along as well. in the blistering heat of the afternoon, we ran a rhythmic circle around the huddle of men, exaggerating each heavy step with the beat. being that much closer flooded my overactive olfactory with whiffs of damp earth, sweat, and green leaves. we circled around and around, taking turns dousing the men with water from plastic bottles. between songs, we came to a complete stop to wait for the beat of the next one and determine the appropriate dance. sometimes we stayed in the same place stomping our feet. but my favorite were the songs we ran to. no matter how hot it was, the endorphins took over and made the experience surreal.

as the second group left, justin went with them. the guys made plans to outfit justin in a custom skirt next time they dance. he is all about it! sandy and i asked around and found out that women have custom dances that they lead as well. we're hopin to rekindle that fire and keep those custom dances in the forefront of the culture.

that evening, we headed home to a nice dinner of laplap and pork supplemented with popcorn. we followed sandy back to her village the next day, taking advantage of the possibility of a truck ride. justin had been asked to take a look at a generator that wasn't working. news has circulated all over the island that he is here to teach computers, and that seems to stretch to include tv's, generators, and lights as well. he tries his best and fixes the basic things advising the rest to check the warranty or send it in. but since sending it in could take months and is expensive, he is a pretty good first option. so we jostled south to navenvena and jumped out to find the generator woman. we wound up sitting in a kitchen eating fried taro that has been ras-rased first (tastes like hashbrowns) and chatting for a few hours first. then we went to church. then we ate lunch of taro and tin meat and then justin looked at the generator. he wound up connecting a few loose wires but chalked it up to an engine problem that he didn't feel comfortable looking into. the woman was grateful for his help and gave us a handful of string beans and two green coconuts as a thank you.

we were about to start the trek home (about an hour walking) when it started to rain again. so we bought some time by stepping into a store and chatting with the woman there. scoping out her store proved to be an extremely excellent idea because she is the only store keeper that i have found on the isand whose store sells chocolate! we bought four bars! i tried covering up the splurge by saying that i was going to bake something with the chocolate and she was all ears. a volunteer in the past had come to their village to do a baking workshop and it was a big hit. after hearing about my baking coconut cookies, she wondered if they could use the dry copra that is squeezed for oil to then make "biscuits," as they call cookies here. she was also interested in banana and papaya bread. so we may be taking a trip back to the chocolate store, giving a baking workshop, and coming back sometime in the future.

after all that chatting, the rain continued but we decided to press on. we made it home just fine, soaked to the bone but happy as could be with our chocolate find.

justin has also fixed up our solar panel! he got a box full of electronic goodies from uncle matt and has been tinkering away with invertors or convertors or whatever. now we can charge our camera battery and other electronics (hopefully a computer soon!) all by the energy of the sun. we're also taking advantage of the sun in other ways. a little trick i learned from the local women: on sunny afternoons drag your mats out into the yard in the full sun and lay out towels, pillows, and other hard to dry or potentially musty items on them. it keeps things fresh and mold free. so nice to have nature providing for us in new ways!

as always, thanks for following our blog and keeping us in the know about news from home! we love hearing your tidbits and hope our temporary absense is somewhat compensated for in our sharing this new country, culture, and lifestyle with you all back home!

-sher

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