Kiwi Christmas

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Firstly apologies for the gaps in my blog - but I don't always get time to give you all the attention you deserve. As I attempt to catch up it seemed odd to be writing about Australia when I am now in New Zealand, so I thought I would get up to speed on NZ and then backtrack to Melbourne and my trip from Sydney to Melbourne. I have uploaded the photos - and my written diary is up to date so at some stage my drivel will find its way to the keyboard. In the meantime - here is now.

NEW ZEALAND

Auckland

My flight to Auckland was unadventurous - although the man in front of me was so heavy that when he tilted the seat back the tray slammed into me so hard that I still have the bruise a week later - a pox upon heavy people! The film was lousy as well - You, Me and Dupree - dreadful, dreadful film and why oh why would Kate Hudson want Owen Wilson when there is a Luke Wilson on the planet? Yes I have no purpose in life and I am obsessed with triviality - it's a gift. Sharlene was at the airport to meet me. This is the first and possibly the only time I will be met during my travels - and it was luxury. It was lovely to see Sharlene again - we worked together about 5 years ago. Obviously as you will see from the photos one of us looks haggard and slightly chubby - but I've given Shar some beauty tips.

At the airport they were very vigilant about ensuring nobody brought fruit or veg into the country. They have food sniffer dogs and a little beagle went leaping around everyone's luggage sniffing out miscreants. I later met a German lady who got fined $200 (about 70 pounds) for forgetting she had an apple in her rucksack, so I'm very glad I declared my earl grey teabags. I have a theory on sniffer dogs - the bigger the airport the bigger the dog. Rodez airport in France (which is teeny) has a sniffer miniature poodle, Auckland which is slightly larger had a beagle and LHR has alsatians. Of course maybe I am completely wrong and they are just trying to use smaller dogs to stop scaring the crap out of old ladies and small children.

That night we went out with Sharlene's flatmate - Jodi and another friend of theirs. We went to the Viaduct which is on the waterfront and where everyone goes after work for a drink by the looks of it. Lots of trendy bars and trendy people and even some gorgeous waiters - although Sharlene and Jodi are in their 20's so they called the waiters 'hot' not gorgeous. Then we went for a Thai meal. I asked for green chicken curry but pointed to something which was obviously completely different on the menu because I got something completely different. Jodi said to send it back - but then we could see that the waitress was getting into trouble because of it, so I walked over and said it was my mistake and I would eat it. The manager was quite intimidating to his staff - and I felt even worse when the poor waitress came and thanked me profusely. Imagine needing a job so badly you live in fear of making a mistake - every time I forget on this trip just how lucky I am, I get a bit of reminder. This time my reminder was a curry so hot it made my eyes water and my nose run - luckily none of the waiters in the Thai place were 'hot' because I wasn't a pretty sight.

The next morning Shar and Jodi had to go into work and I had to go ... absolutely nowhere, but I dragged myself out of bed and decided to go swimming. One of the things I love about Oz and NZ is that all large towns have public swimming baths - in fact Auckland has about 5, it is great, and only costs $5.50 which is two quid. Bargain - particularly as the verandah surrounding the pool is a gym and you get to ogle quite attractive men (I feel stupid calling them 'hot). After that I wandered around the city and then went back to the house to slump in front of Kiwi TV - which is American and British TV with loads of adverts and the odd Australian soap opera chucked in for good measure. Their flat is really near the city centre, has a great view from the balcony and it was just great not to be sharing kitchens and bathrooms with 30 other people. In the evening Sharlene cooked dinner for us and I went out to buy some wine and some pineapple lumps - as requested by Sharlene. They didn't have pineapple lumps so I got a tin of pineapple rings instead. Sharlene was a bit perplexed - pineapple lumps are apparently an NZ delicacy - disgusting tasting sticky yellow stuff encased in lousy chocolate - how was I to know she meant lollies and not tinned fruit (lollies is their word for sweets). I thought she might have made me a celebratory pavlova or something and needed fruit. The trials and tribulations of speaking a foreign language just never end.

Friday I went swimming again - I just feel like I should be doing more exercise and I like swimming - obviously it has nothing to do with watching the men who use that gym. In the afternoon I went up the Skytower - you get out of the lift (glass lift) at the 54th and 60th floors - so not really stomach churningly high at all. However you do get amazing views of Auckland, it has such a beautiful setting - you can see for miles from the Skytower. After this I took the ferry to Devonport - and went for a 5km walk. Devonport is a very pretty little suburb of Auckland, to live there you have to be loaded, but it only costs $7 to pop across by ferry and pretend you're loaded so that is good. The beaches are really pretty - also even though some of the houses are right in front of the beach, the beach is still public access, none of this Malibu private beach malarkey in NZ thank you very much.

Saturday Sharlene was recovering from her work's Christmas party so we went out for breakfast and later we went to the supermarket. It wasn't terribly different from at home - disappointingly. I love visiting foreign supermarkets, other people want museums, couture shopping - me I just love food halls. I always expect loads of really different exciting foods = but thanks to globalisation we can all eat everything from every country all of the time. Mind you thanks to globalisation I can trot around the world without a care or a job, so maybe I'll just shut up about it for now. Because we were hungry we bought loads of food but not much of substance - and we bought far too many sweets. Then we went home and ate ourselves sick whilst slouching in front of the TV.

Sunday was much of the same - without the trip to the supermarket. Out for breakfast to Muriwai beach, a tour of the Auckland Domain which is a park. Whilst we sat at breakfast overlooking the bay we watched all the people go by and tried to each pick 5 decent men. We didn't manage one between us - I nearly found one but didn't like the way he walked. How can you object to the way someone walks, this I feel has reached a whole new level of shallowness. I'm so proud. I was still avoiding deciding where I was going to be for Christmas and New Year - as if it would suddenly take care of itself. Since Sydney I have been quite spoilt and not had the bother of booking ahead or thinking where I was going to go, now I was back on the road again and decisions were required. Big decisions such as chucking my job in and deciding to bugger off around the world - that is the work of a second for me. Small everyday decisions - that is when I wish I was happily married and had someone to do all the tricky stuff for me like decide where to go tomorrow and, of course, earn the money to take us there. I busied myself laying on the couch reading the Sunday newspapers whilst I avoided making plans. Sharlene actually thought I might be bored but you have no idea what a luxury a lazy Sunday reading the papers is until you haven't done it for 5 months. You can't in hostels - it would just seem wrong. Even when we were suffering from terrible hangovers in Melbourne and it was 42 degrees outside we still felt obliged to drag ourselves out - little martyrs that we were. The lack of air-conditioning in the hostel helped motivate us though, it has to be admitted.

Monday I spent all day dithering about where I would go until I finally remembered WWOOFING - willing workers on organic farms. My cousin Steven suggested I do this because his brother runs an organic farm in Ireland, and I had completely forgotten about it. Sadly by the time I got my brain into gear the travel shops were shut - so I got to procrastinate for yet another day. Every evening Sharlene and Jodi were badgering me to book something - I like to think they were concerned I would spend my whole trip dithering rather than merely wanting rid of me. Tuesday - I toddled off to buy the WWOOF book (couldn't someone have thought up a better name?). On the way a kiwi bloke, who seemed somewhat vague in a Keith Richards way, asked me if I knew how to use the cut-rate phone cards. I explained it all to him. About 10 minutes later I bumped into him again - however it wasn't as creepy as the Greek guy in Melbourne because Keith was clearly too vague to stalk anyone. I asked him how he got on - and suddenly I got his lifestory - how he is travelling around NZ, but the bus to Auckland left a gas station without him and he lost all his hand luggage - which meant he also lost all his study books because he is studying to be a builder blah blah blah. I could only sympathise because I am a dab hand at losing hand luggage myself, but have to admit to amazement at the fact that builder's study - who'd have thought. Well apart from builders obviously.

Now I had made a half a decision I decided to throw caution and inertia to the wind and, as a backup plan, actually booked 3 days in Coromandel and 3 days in Whitianga. To celebrate Shar and Jodi took me to the mall. It was exciting - dozens of shops I can't afford. I really wanted to buy something new to go out in on Weds, but settled for three very average t-shirts - at least they are different from the t-shirts I already have. You get so bored of the same clothes week in, week out. Poor, poor workshy little me!

On Wednesday I had actually received quite a few requests from people for me to go and work on their farms - even though I emphasised the fact that I know absolutely nothing about farming, organics, land, but some people wanted help with the internet, some with looking after their children and some just wanted a spare pair of hands. It is quite exciting. You don't get paid when you work on these farms. You work for 4 - 6 hours per day (5 days a week in most places, 7 in some) for free food and accommodation. But you get to travel for longer, meet local people and learn about organic farms. For those of you who are thinking I'm mad .... they have lots of organic vineyards here. The book alone was well worth the $40 I paid for it (14 pounds). I can't put it down, it is literally hours of entertainment. I would love to meet all of them just to see what they are really like. Each farmer writes their own blurb, so you get a good idea of what they are like just from that. For example - the man who states 'workers MUST be enthusiastic and be able to accept gentle criticism' is very likely a nitpicking get. Many of them give their children's names and ages as well - lots of Gideons, Ludos and Aramintas - it's like reading a list of Guardian subscribers. There are dozens and dozens of farms to choose from, so I used a simple method to narrow it down - any farms which say vegans only are to be avoided, I am sure they are very worthy people, but there is nothing wrong with a nice steak every now and again. All farms which emphasise "no drugs, smoking or alcohol on the premises' are definitely to be avoided. If I am working for free I at least expect the odd vat of wine in the evening. And from Thursday 28th I will be working (for free - materialistic little me!) at a horse trekking farm in the Bay of Islands.

Wednesday in the evening we hit the town. It being the week before Christmas it was heaving. This time we didn't go to the Viaduct we went to Ponsonby which is just round the corner from the flat. At one point there was a gorgeous maori bloke sitting next to me and so I struck up a conversation with him. Despite his looks and physique he was quite dull - and, even worse, an estate agent. I was apparently very disappointed. Yes I do worry that I am turning shallowness into an art form, but there is just something about being an estate agent.

Thursday I actually left Auckland. I nearly chickened out - just getting on the bus was chaotic. Also on the way to the bus station I got soaked to the skin in about 3 seconds of rain. It was like a bucket had been poured over me. No wonder NZ is so green if that is normal rainfall. It took forever to get out of the city - everyone was obviously heading home for Christmas. For me it just doesn't seem Christmassy, the weather, despite the rain, is just too mild. It stays light until about 9 p.m. and you never hear Christmas records on the radio.

Coromandel

After a change in Thames to a tiny little bus which whizzed round the tiny, bendy roads so fast I was really really travelsick, I arrived in Coromandel town. It is a really quaint little village with lots of little delis, funky shops and cafes. We had a lovely view from the YHA as well. One thing I have noticed however about NZ women is that a lot of them have mullet hairdos and there were a lot of long shaggy grey mullet styles in Coromandel . The lady who ran the hostel seemed really cross to see me a day early - and I assumed they place must be full, but it was practically empty, I think that was just her manner because she was really helpful, she just said it all as if she was about to convict you. The next day, however, when a backpacker sneaked in and used the showers and the kitchen she was about to convict them. I have only seen people do this once or twice in Oz, but have never seen it dealt with quite so scarily. Strangely enough the trespasser paid up. I wonder how the three of them (two had paid, one was sneaked in) fared after that because she sent their names and their vehicle details to every tourist hostel and campsite in both islands.

I pottered about the little town. I keep on taking photos of the pohutukawa tree - which is the New Zealand "Christmas tree". It is about the same size as an oak tree so they don't cut it down and shove it in front of the TV for three weeks, it is just that it blooms with the most amazing red flowers at Christmas time. Annie telephoned me and we had a good natter. Annie is from NZ so she was instructing me on what to see and what I must not miss out on (hokey pokey ice cream) and it was lovely to hear her news too. Then I walked up to Driving Creek Railway which is narrow-gauge mountain railway built in the 70's by Barry Brickell. To think that I struggle to keep my blog updated when one man can build a railway on his own - I need to be more creative. He didn't even start charging people to use it until the 90's, so maybe in 20 years time I can charge people to read my drivel? Even though it was a weekday the bus was packed with tourists. I was the only person who wasn't either Japanese or accompanying a small child. That evening the hostel was a little less quiet and a group of us sat chatting and drinking wine until midnight. An american bloke was asking me about kumara (sweet potato) and I said I thought they were nice, but different from the ones you buy in the UK. At that a very jolly hockey sticks British lady launched herself into the kitchen to inform us that you get those EXACT kumara in the UK, they are ABSOLUTELY LOVELY and VERY MUCH the same. I stared at her in surprise trying to work out how a conversation about something as dull as yams could be so offensive to her. She asked me where I lived in the UK, and when I said Kent, declared 'well of course that explains it, I live in London'. Yes ... of course, foolish, hicky little me. Thank you for your wisdom. Before we went to bed a few of us stood around outside trying to identify the Southern Cross - it was cloudy and we were a little pissed so we didn't. Jolly Hockey Sticks lady wasn't with us - she'd have known, they are bound to sell the Southern Cross in Fulham's Waitrose. She also sneered very loudly when we were talking about the cinema. "Evenings aren't about going to the cinema, they are about drinking good wine with good conversation" in other words she couldn't cope for two hours without the sound of her own voice. I am sure that if she has a child stashed away at home it will be called Gideon - even it the poor child should be female.

Saturday it was a bit rainy so the American bloke asked if I'd like to go for a driving tour in his car - so off we went to Whitianga (even though I was spending Christmas there), Cathedral Cove, Hot Water beach and Cooks Beach. Whitianga is pronounced Fitianga, which is a little confusing. Hot Water beach was really disappointing - I had imagined you just picked your spot anywhere on the beach and dug a deep hole to get your own personal spa pool. But the hot water spring is only in one tiny corner of the beach, and, this being the busiest week of the year, it was packed with locals and tourists vying for a hotspot. We didn't bother - just because I am a tourist, I still avoid other tourists like the plague. We went on a long walk which fulfilled my need to do some kind of exercise. The American bloke is on leave from the Antartic Research place - despite having not been near a woman in months he showed no interest in me. I wasn't offended, the antipathy was mutual - his legs were virtually hairless - it just seemed wrong. In fact at one point whilst I was plodding along behind him observing just how hairless they were I couldn't help but wonder if he'd been a sex change person - but he was getting a bald patch. Even for authenticity's sake that would be too much - I want a penis, a beard and no boobs please - and oh yes, can you just rip out a circle of my hair.

Cathedral Cove is very beautiful, so is Hahei Beach. Again there were houses all along the beach - and some of them were fantastic, but again anyone can have access to the beach. It was an overcast day with light drizzle but not at all cold and a lovely walk. In the evening I was going for a pizza with the American - but virtually everywhere was closed apart from the Peppertree restaurant so we ate there. It was a weird feeling - it is meant to be a very romantic restaurant, but we were very obviously not a couple. Quite awkward really. I insisted on paying half - even though I had only had one course to his two and couldn't really afford it, just in case he got the wrong idea and thought paying for me was ... well paying for me. He accepted my offer with alarming alacrity - hairless legs and no gentleman either. Ah well, that will teach me to liaise with men with facial hair.

Whitianga

Christmas Eve I got the bus to Whitianga - where I had toured the day before, but I had accommodation booked so I had to go and on Christmas Day there wouldn't be any public transport or tours so I at least I had got the Cathedral Cove and Hot Water beach bit out of the way. The YHA was much busier than the one in Coromandel and overlooked Mercury Bay so it had a beautiful setting. The dorm was an 8-bed dorm, but it never seemed like it because there were loads of divisions. Each dorm also had amazing window seats where you could sit and read and watch the sun go down if it was too breezy to brave the beach. I was in backpacker heaven - beautiful setting, a book to read, good company - what more could you want?

Everyone in the dorm was really nice - there was a German lady spending a few months in NZ, two girls, one English and one Swiss, who had been working on a farm and had taken a holiday for Christmas, some Japanese tourists working and other Japanese tourists touring. Whilst the shops were still open I decided I should shop for Christmas. Nobody seemed interested in doing a combined thing, so I just bought fillet steak for my dinner. In the evening Doris, the german lady, decorated the table with candles and cards and we sat around chatting and drinking wine - it was lovely. Very sociable and welcoming. I had sat at the window seat reading for a couple of hours dithering about going and joining everyone - which was just ridiculous. Sometimes my nerve just goes, but every time I make an effort everyone is really friendly.

Christmas Day was really warm - although slightly overcast. I was up early and I wished I had bought Nigella's recipe for Christmas buns and made them for everyone - I just wanted to do something Christmassy. This is obviously a hangover from living with Shar and Jodi - Jodi was always mixing cakes and stuff, so much so that I nicknamed her Jodelia, but it would have been a nice thing to do on Christmas morning. I turned the TV channel to carols - but they were 'modern' carols, i.e. new-age claptrap nobody has ever heard of, and didn't instil the spirit of christmas at all. Actually it did upset Sandra who was only 22 and missing her family at Christmas, so we went back to the hideous cartoons. Then I went for a long walk along the beach in the morning, although I kept on having 30 minute rests because I couldn't put my book down. It was a lovely day. Everyone you passed said hello, but nobody said 'happy christmas'. I just don't think they go in for it here. At lunchtime everyone was cooking their Christmas meal. The japanese put us all to shame - a huge turkey, veg, rice balls, salad, soup - they had really gone to town. They don't even celebrate Christmas in Japan, but they had got recipes for cooking turkey and Christmas Cake. We all sat outside at one long table with party poppers and wine and it was really sociable and friendly. Despite meeting so many Japanese tourists along the way this was about the first time I have actually socialised with them. Normally they are on mammoth tours and sleep in the bus as it whizzes them between each tourist spot, which you can understand if you have limited holiday time. But it was great to just get to know them and chat away. Their English was very impressive. As so many of them work there and are semi-permanent residents I thought the owners could have made a bit more effort and done them a Christmas dinner, but they did a great job by themselves.

In the afternoon I went kayaking with Chrissie and Sandra from my room. We kayaked way out without really concentrating on where we should be. Sandra kept on insisting we had to go back to the line of the buoys and she had a point. But we had great fun just mucking around in the water and a lovely way to spend the afternoon.

In the evening everyone cooked separately, but we all ate together again. Two young dutch girls sat at the table and sneered at everyone who wasn't young, male and 'hot' - in other words us. We just ignored them after a while - everyone else was really friendly. Strange how when we all suggested vacating the table and eating our second dessert at the window seat so the large group preparing their meal could sit at the table, the dutch girls wouldn't move. However give them a couple of young attractive men in the sitting room and they were out from that table so fast I was amazed the whole table didn't go over. We were happy - we had the window seat and Chrissie's mince pies to wash down the Christmas Pudding which one of the Japanese girls had provided. We sat there for hours chatting, then a group of us went and sat on the beach and looked at the stars. We had run out of alcohol, but it was such a beautiful setting it just didn't matter. The night sky in the southern hemisphere is amazing - although I have no idea which star is which.

Boxing Day - I am not sure they even bother with that here. The shops were all open and everything seemed normal. Chrissie, Sandra and I went kayaking in the morning. We were going to kayak up the coast to see if there were any dolphins, but the tide was coming in and where the tide and the bay collide you get stuck in the backwash - you have to wait for the tide to go out apparently, so we just mooched around the bay for a couple of hours, revelling in the sun and the sea and the exercise. The tide was coming in so fast when we neared our starting point that we had decided to get out of the kayaks and walk them back along the beach in the shallows rather than battle against the tide. We must have looked a bit strange, but my arms were killing me. Anyway aqua-jogging is all the rage here. I think I got a bit too much sun, so in the afternoon I just lazed around in the window seat and read my book so I could leave it there. I did venture out to the beach later in the afternoon to write 'Happy New Year' with shells so I could photo it and send it to you. It isn't an original idea, but I just wanted to do it. A tiny maori girl came to help me - by rearranging all my shells and collecting others for me. I was going to photo her with the message, but she ran away too fast.

And now here I am back in Auckland. Today I go up to the Bay of Islands to try working on organic farms (and without a salary, it could just kill me).

I hope you all have a lovely New Year and Best wishes for 2007

Viv xx

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Photos

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Happy New Year from NZ

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Vivienne English and Sharlenie Beanie

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Auckland skyline

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Auckland from the Sky Tower

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Devonport = some kind of gremlin thing

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Skytower reflected in a building - another dismal attempt at being arty

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Shar on Muriwai beach

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Devonport, Auckland

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The view from Coromandel YHA.

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Driving Creek Railway and the pottery tunnel

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Hahei Beach, Coromandel Peninsula

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Hot Water Beach, Coromandel Peninsula, NZ

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Puhotekawa - the New Zealand Christmas Tree

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Cathedral cove, Coromandel Peninsula.

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View of the bay at Cathedral Cove - the sun did shine that day ... sometimes.

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View from the Cormandel Pa (lookout)

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Christmas Day in the hostel - and the Japanese made an amazing effort, unlike the lazy brits.

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Christmas Evening in the hostel.

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Christmas day on the beach

Comments

[Mandie]

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
A Late Merry Christmas Viv and an early Happy New Year to you. Glad you're having such a fab time with all those "hot" men, but girl you need to stop being so fussy if you're gonna find one that you want to keep! Love from Mandie, Alan, Alex and Arun

[Steve Gallagher]

Turkey is over rated
Happy New Year Viv, just drank a beer for you, while reading your blog. Loved the photos, but could have done with some more 'beach' shots. FYI the City is wet and dark, and the trains were delayed yesterday. I bet you're missing all this crap. Keep well and safe travels. Steve x