Kitten Club - By Sonnie

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Life in Australia with “those Irish people”….

What can we say, from the moment we picked up “those Irish people” from the airport - it has been a non-stop whirlwind of chatter, laughter and craic!

Firstly just trying to understand each others ‘lingos’ & accents has been hilarious, for example; “what is an udder”, and “how do you say ‘are‘ “ then realising disappointedly that they are said the same way!

Secondly trying to keep up with the late nights, the bar hopping and the talking has been exhausting! (for Sonnie, not for Steve!!).

For example Irene & Karoline invited Sonnie out to a quiet Friday night after work in the city whilst Steve was away back home in Eire. “we’ll just have a beer and some nachos” was the aim of the night. Off to the “Kitten Club” we go, (no, there aren’t nachos there!), but there is definitely champagne. About 6 champagnes later (this was only 7:15pm) we decided to go and find those damn nachos! As soon as we get out of the door at the Kitten Club we pass a group of 5 males and happily scream at them “do you know where we can get nachos”!…Well they didn’t know but they had a better suggestion - come back up into the Kitten Club.

Off we go merrily back up with these strangers - one of whom “Peter” (really named Steve) looks like a trendy Queer Eye for the Straight guy character & Irene asks him if he is gay and can he take her shopping! Anyway we get into the Kitten Club and what do we do - sing the Melbourne Demons theme song of-course! (doesn’t everyone do that?….) Many, many champagnes later, Irene informs Sonnie “I want to go home, take me home!” so Sonnie & Irene walk to get a train. Irene informs Sonnie that she wants to go to McDonalds which Sonnie proceeds to walk to, but oh no, Irene knows the way and according to her we were going the wrong way!

Then suddenly a nice young man named ‘Tim’ comes along and Irene invites him to dinner at McDonalds with us - to my horror he accepts! So after a Big Cheeseburger Meal (40mins later) with Tim, Irene gets up, tells Tim “it has been a pleasure”, shakes his hand and tells Sonnie “come on Sonnie we are going home now”. That would be fine, but the first taxi that comes along, pulls in to pick us up, then sees the state of Irene, puts his foot down, turns his steering wheel and zooms away!! “OK Irene stand up straight and act normal!!” - Next cab accepts us and Irene asks him how much he wants for the fare - 2 million or 6 million !! “ 6 million it is then” she exclaims - “but I have to tell you, you are bleeding me dry”!

Finally we get home and the real Peter calls (see above, Kitten Club!) - I am making tea and toast for Irene, then realise she has fallen asleep while Peter is still talking to her (poor Peter) - anyway I am still fairly chatty (ie drunk) and say hello to Peter (poor Peter again!), then wake Irene up and she argues with Peter regarding whether he should tell her what her upcoming birthday surprise is “tell me Peter, NO DON’T TELL ME PETER, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc,!!

Next day Irene & Karoline get out of bed with the ‘horrors’ and Sonnie exclaims “I am fine” (as the day went on I realised I wasn’t ).Eventually we were fine after, toast, home made nachos (yes we finally got those nachos), a meat-pie and a huge lamb kebab (oops Souvlaki)!

We want “those Irish people” to stay in Australia forever…..

Xx
Edit: Don’t forget “You are making me look like a lunatic!”]

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