Joe the Chef
looking rather like that guy off Gimme Gimme Gimme - is it Richard Drafus or something?
I dont know if I explained, but apart from seeing me, the boyz actaully had another reason for coming down to Melly. Chris had found a website (www.standbycars.com), that holds information on all the major car and van hire companies that need vehicles returning to their base city, and they'd managed to get a HUGE 7m long, 6 person camper van, with plasma screen, DVD player and PlayStation for just $1 a day with a bit more for insurance! UNBELIEVEABLE !!
Chris had mentioned that I should come along, since they had a couple of spaces spare in the van, and the money that I'd save on rent would pay for the return flight to Melbourne - so how could a resist - A true Pricilla Queen Of The Desert gay road trip up the coast - fan-bloody-tastic!
We picked up the van late on Sunday, which was rather annoying cause the deal was we only got 3 days, and there are a hell of a lot of km's to travel between Melbourne and Sydney, something which we hadn't really planned on.
Chris started off driving the monster; if the X-Trail we'd hired a couple of days ago
was a tank, this was more like a ..... a.... well, a very big tank, (sorry, I can't think of something bigger than a tank). Still, we seemed to manage, and had a fantastic few days on the road.
Dan was elected the van-bitch, whose only purpose was to serve us 4 and was renamed 'Bud Bud', later, 'But But', then 'Captain Butt F*ck', all depending on our mood. Joseph was the head chef, managing to serve drinks and snacks whilst travelling at 100kph - believe me, it's really not an easy task! While Chris, Tim and I escaped the chores due to being the only drivers.
The days were spent on the road, (we were advised not to travel at night due to the risk of hitting kangaroos, although throughout the whole trip, speeding across the beautiful countryside, we only ever saw one kangaroo, and that was lying dead by the side of the road), the nights were spent eating Joe's fantastic Chillies, Spag Bols, drinking copious amounts of wine and vodka and playing pin the cock on the naked man - dont ask - brilliant trip.
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