Make Ordinary Moments Special

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Our friends, Justin Porter and Adri Vanbianchi, were wed on September 5. It was an extraordinary celebration!! A coming together of two people so in love, and of their vibrant and embracing families. Although the ceremony had the polish of being planned and rehearsed, it was not at all stiff or contrived. The genuine joy, love and sincerity of the couple and their families radiated as they interacted with warmth, ease and casualness before us all as witnesses. The ceremony was a remarkable combination of complimentary motifs and traditions Elements of Judaism, Hinduism and Buddhism combined to give meaning and richness. The gray concrete bunker of Fort Warden was transformed into a ritualistic and celebratory space with brightly colored prayer-flag banners as a backdrop on the semicircular bunker wall and explosive bursts of brightly colored flowers encircled the sacred space. The chairs completed the circle defining a contained and focused area in which to perform the wedding rites. Guests also perched upon walls surrounding the core area. Love emanated!

Each family member shared their thoughts. The message that has stuck with me is one about encouraging us to perceive ordinary moments and experiences as savored and special ones. To illustrate this concept Justin and Adri performed a tea ceremony during the wedding. They “specialized” their ordinary, daily tradition of sharing a cup of tea each morning. The ceremony was not the strictly choreographed, Japanese type, however. After the tea was ceremoniously poured the two sipped from the cup, casually passing it back and forth as the ceremony continued. In this way they made special, that which is ordinary in their lives, and I’m sure that awareness of specialness infuses each morning they now spend together.

This particular message is celebrated in a marvelous book Dave and I both enjoyed reading while staying in the author’s lovely home in Port Townsend during the wedding weekend. Wow was that sweet! Erica Bauermeister (Michael and Gloria’s sister-in-law) has written The School of Essential Ingredients, a novel about individuals in a cooking class. While getting to know the inner psyches of these characters one gains tremendous appreciation and specialness for the various everyday processes of cooking, the aromas and the visuals of ever-changing textures, shapes and colors. The book is rich with insight and reminds me that ordinary moments shall be appreciated and savored as they are indeed actually very special ones. I highly recommend reading this book. And it has lovely illustrations by Gloria, who never even mentioned she’d done them.

Adri and Justin wrote their wedding vows. Vows that can help give intention to any loving relationship. The words and thoughts are so beautiful. With their permission, I will share them here:

On this day, we have made the commitment to be equal partners, loving friends, and supportive companions throughout each other’s life. We promise to build a harmonious relationship of equality. We shall respect each other’s uniqueness and help on another grow to our fullest potential. As we share life’s experiences we promise to express our innermost thoughts and feelings, to be sensitive to each other’s needs, to share life’s joys, to comfort each other through life’s sorrows, to challenge each other, to achieve intellectual and physical fulfillment as well as spiritual and emotional tranquility. We will build a home together and fill it with laughter, empathy, movement, imagination, trust, friendship and companionship. May our love provide us with the freedom to be ourselves and the courage to follow our mutual and individual paths.

May we live each day as the first, the last, and the only day we will have with each other.

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Comments

[Janet]

You were there!!
Dave and Melisse, Small world...Fran and I walk together at 6 a.m. on Tuesdays. Over the summer we talked about Justin and Adri's wedding ...I shared stories from our daughter's Memorial Day wedding. Just last week, Fran emailed me wedding pictures. And now to realize that you were there. Connections. Janet

[mae]

Make Ordinary Moments Special
Making an ordinary moment special is to capture it, to savor it and to salvage the moment from the oblivion.