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* Fish 'n chips: served literally with fried crisps. Someone need to tell the Yanks we mean Fish 'n Fries.
* Four-wheeled fashion statement?: Nobody drives red cars in Manhattan.
* Stealth Mosquitos: they attack without a hum. Completely silent bastards!
* Dogs: they don't 'poo' ... they 'poop'.
* MSG: it's a whole food group.
* Peanut Butter: there aint nothin' you can't get in this scrumptious flavor.
* Deep fried Oreos: Everyone has a deep-fryer in their home kitchen. I do, don't you?
* Chickpea obsession: what's the big deal with hummus? It comes in 35 different flavors and the local store stocks every one but your favorite. (Mmmm, 'supremely spicy' hummus).
* Free chocolate milk at Starbucks: The condiment counter boasts milk jugs, cappuccino chocolate shakers and empty water cups. Too easy.
* Doormen & Hostesses: award for the highest proportion of superfluous, boredom-steeped jobs in any city.
* Cat-sized rats: you haven't seen a rat till you've walked Downtown after dark.
* Memorial Day Mass Exodus: Us Aussies, (and French and German and Brits) were the only ones left in the city.
* Sausages on the street: have no beginning and no end. And they look like giant curls of poop. (See photo).

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