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Published: December 14th 2013
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I am back! I put the blog aside for a bit there because I was back home, which is not to say I wasn't having adventures, but just that it's been more about internal journeys than external ones.
For those of you who are close to me, you know that the past year has brought tremendous changes to my life. And for those who may not know me that well, I can tell you that 2013 has not been the easiest year of my life. Yet I embraced every challenge, overcame each obstacle, tackled the emotions, and walked away from the uncontrollable. The result of this has been a personal transformation- in the way I view myself and the world around me.
In the words of Avicii, "all this time I was finding myself, and I didn't know I was lost..."
My whole definition of life has been reworked. So what is
life? According to dictionary.com, life is "the condition that distinguishes organisms from inorganic objects and dead organisms, being manifested by
growth...and the power of
adaptation to environment through changes originating internally." EXACTLY!
Let's look at that word
growth. You could take it literally
to mean height, weight, girth...but I am pretty content with my general body shape. Yet since I am a living being I should, by definition, keep growing. In order to grow I must nourish myself: intellectually, emotionally, spiritually. I'm talking about personal growth, about internal reflection, about mindfulness. I want to question, dream, feel, learn, see, explore. And what about
adaptation? As defined above, part of being alive is the ability to adapt to your environment through changes originating internally. I should be able to take my internal growth and apply it to the external world. I alone am responsible for my reactions to my surroundings. My thoughts, my words, my behaviors, and my choices, are all within my control. If I am living, I must also be growing, adapting, changing.
When I got home in August, I found myself in a very lost, unhappy place, so I hunkered down and got to work. Yes, personal growth and adaption takes work. I spent hours, days, weeks, talking to people, talking to myself, spending time alone, writing, drawing, singing, dancing, laughing, crying, thinking and over-thinking, analyzing and over-analyzing. It was exhausting. But I became my own project; I
took myself apart, kept the pieces I liked, tweaked the ones that needed improvement, left behind the ones I no longer had use for, then reassembled myself. While I am still far from perfect, I find that I have been unbelievably happy since I took the time to build the me I want to be. Even the traits that others may see as flaws make me smile, because they are my true being. The journey doesn't stop now though; everyday is a new day to make myself a better person.
As the end of the year approaches swiftly, I suggest that, if you took the time to read this blog, you take some time for inner reflection. Are you happy? Do you like yourself? What have you done recently for you: your body, your mind, your soul? I think that as a society we are so busy, charging onward from one day to the next, that we lose ourselves. Make at least one resolution for 2014 and post it somewhere you can see it. Once a month, once a week, once a day, check back in with yourself. Are you achieving your goals? Are you living out your true values? Are you growing, adapting, changing? I know it's hard- no one said life was going to be easy. But I would much rather be a living, breathing organism, with all its suffering and all its joy, than a rock. You only get one life, I hope you live it exactly the way you want!
More coming soon from me- I will let you know how all this growth has impacted my plans for the future 😊
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Virginia
non-member comment
Good to know
Good to know that you feel you have grown and that you are happy with knowing that you have. I am aware of change all the time but I don't know how I feel about most of it. Funny. Good luck in all you do. Know that I am always with you and here for you! Love, mom